Guess Who’s Out of Rehab

August 24th, 2010 // 44 Comments
Lindsay Lohan

Lindsay Lohan has officially been released from rehab and walks freely among us now, according to sources for RadarOnline. Based on UCLA’s diagnosis that she’s not a drug-addicted alcoholic, it’s more than likely she’s also free of the SCRAM bracelet, so it’s literally more than a matter of minutes until she’s falling face-first into a gutter outside Marmont as Samantha Ronson sprouts leathery wings to fly them to Abusive Lesbian Land. God, it’s a great day to be alive unless you live in LA.

Photo: Pacific Coast News


  1. The Return of Cokefoot.

  2. Bowman

    This will end in fire…

  3. gogo

    and guess who’s back from vacation? :P

  4. RaraAvis

    There – are you all happy now? Let the paparazzi stalking begin…

  5. nick


  6. I’m calling it. She’ll be dead within a month. Coke overdose or car accident… something of that nature.

  7. Vito

    I don’t know about her dying so soon, but she’ll very likely be in some trouble of some sort — in a hospital, a jail, another fucked up destructive relationship, or…well, yeah, maybe dead.

    Of course her mother will blame it on someone else…What a fucked up crew!

  8. The MAN

    I would like to give her a messy cream pie!

  9. Overtsexed

    I would destroy that pussy.

  10. LJ

    I wonder who is going to run the pool taking bets on when Lindsay Lohan will fall on her face in front of the paparazzi with coke traces still on her nostrils?

    My bet would be six months from today.

  11. Shocked

    I hate celebrities. No regular person would get let off the way they do. I’ve gotten in soooo much trouble over a little bit of nothing and so does everyone else so why the hell shouldn’t they have to also? Lameeee.

  12. uguys rsad

    I know what ur thinking… I would too

  13. Katie

    Are her feet smoking?????

  14. eman

    she looks like the fat kardashian here.

  15. Taz

    Let’s hang her!

  16. herbiefrog

    hoorah : ))

  17. What a moron

    The countdown to her doing something REALLY stupid has begun again. Since she’s learned absolutely nothing from her experience (she’s taken no responsibility for her actions, and is demanding an apology from the court for putting her stupid slutty ass in jail in the first place), and is blaming everyone else but herself for what has happened, she will do the exact same stupid things over again. She’ll start drinking & drugging, she’ll drive drunk, she’ll steal things again, she’ll start lying again, she’ll be out until 5am going to parties & bars (great place for an alcoholic to hang out, btw), she’ll end up in more photos acting like a cokewhore. And, everything that’s documented in photographs will be “setups” from unnamed people who are out to get her.

    I hope she either gets her shit together right away or just disappears. Dying is acceptable, but just going away is preferrable…

  18. Ilikeyp


  19. Any Guy

    ok, so apparently I’m the only one who has NO fucking clue why her feet are in a cloud of white dust. what the fuck IS that? photoshopped? Tony Montana just tripped at her feet? WHAT?

    • egypt22

      Yeah, I saw that, too. And my first thought was, “Oh, she must have stepped in a puddle of water and is melting a la the Wicked Witch of the West”.

  20. I, for one, could not be happier that she’s on the loose again. It just means that I still have a shot at some major points if she croaks before year end. YAY!!!

  21. Woohoo! Red Bull and eightballs for everyone!


  22. UY

    This will all turn out incredibly well. For the paps, pundits and bloggers.

    Just like releasing a fox for the hunt. (Using the word “fox” in the most literal mammalian sense, or course.)

  23. Gando

    Well,I guess she’ll be busy the coming time doing her talk show/interview rounds.

  24. Milo

    I think she’s learned her lesson from her short stint in prison and rehab. I think she realizes that her fans are pulling for her to straighten up and fly right. I think she knows that her family is behind her. I think she’ll once again prove that she’s a pretty good actress. Basically, I think she’ll take advantage of her “second chance” a la Robert Downey Jr. and will be one of Hollywood’s top talents again.

    Just kidding. I think she’ll do a lot of coke and probably OD.

  25. Because that’s not crack, it’s chalk dust, because she keeps chalk in her purse…just in case she needs to give an impromptu lesson to orphans in India on the hardships of stardom…followed by a quick instructional on the chemistry of cutting narcotics

    • Okay…sooooooo…has anyone wiki-ed Cocaine? Jesus, there’s more research there than on Parkinson’s or HIV. Oh…and a pic of a lady lighting up…for good measure. Shit, I bet you if we told Lilo (and everyone else who contributed to the Cocaine page) that she could take a swan dive into a pool of coke if she figured out a way to clean up the Guly, that shit would be done in a week. Albeit, the method would involve Dina piloting a fishing boat with Lilo acting as a human skimmer, but…just think.

  26. captain america


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