Eva Longoria Parker launches clandestine assault on cheaters

December 30th, 2008 // 37 Comments

Eva Longoria Parker hates cheaters and has no qualms about going private eye on their asses, according to NY Daily News:

If she discovered a pal’s man was unfaithful, “(I’d) tell her,” the Desperate Housewife declares in Glamour magazine’s February Man issue, adding that she’d even resort to sneaky tactics to expose the guy.
“I would probably take a picture with my camera phone first,” she says. “It’s tough, because sometimes people kill the messenger. But I think the truth always comes out, regardless of who tells us.”

Real smooth, Eva. Now every cheater in America knows to watch out for a garden gnome with a camera phone when they’re out with their mistress. “Is that a pointy red hat?! Shit, act like you’re my sister. So, hey, remember that dad guy? He was great. Wait, it’s a traffic cone. Phew. Now I don’t have to explain why I’ve been fondling your breasts this whole time.”

Photos: WENN
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Eva Longoria
Eva Longoria
Eva Longoria
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Comments (37)

  1. Jens | December 30, 2008 at 3:31 pm

    rat face!

    Reply
  2. Tim | December 30, 2008 at 3:32 pm

    meh, she’s alright

    Reply
  3. EverybodylovesROUGHers | December 30, 2008 at 3:33 pm

    wooooh eva got a booty going on there….

    Reply
  4. nastyjay | December 30, 2008 at 3:34 pm

    mm boring…

    Reply
  5. idk | December 30, 2008 at 3:35 pm

    3:35

    Reply
  6. aero | December 30, 2008 at 3:39 pm

    …that bitch better be purrrrrr-fect.

    Reply
  7. fot | December 30, 2008 at 3:43 pm

    She’s wearing the spanx again.

    Boy, she’s no prize.

    Reply
  8. b | December 30, 2008 at 3:44 pm

    who cares what a plain 5 foot tall monkey lovin spic thinks?

    Reply
  9. lola | December 30, 2008 at 3:47 pm

    Hey now.. I am that height and all the guys love it. A tall girl can be a turn off to a short man. I love men and women of all sizes so the haters on this site are just grasping at straws.

    Reply
  10. lisa | December 30, 2008 at 3:50 pm

    shes so pretty and smart!

    Reply
  11. kitten | December 30, 2008 at 3:59 pm

    Yeah lola, but you’re also easy to slap around and throw around. I’m 5’8 and lovin it!!!

    Reply
  12. Deacon Jones | December 30, 2008 at 4:03 pm

    @11

    Agreed. But she’s tighter…

    Eva’s a cunt

    Reply
  13. Jimmy Jim | December 30, 2008 at 4:12 pm

    she’s pulling a wynona with whatever she’s smuggling in the rear of that dress.

    but seriously, she’s a good looking normal woman. Good looking normal women are a dime a dozen, good looking celebrities seem to be much rarer, as they are typically just plain unhealthy or doctored.

    Reply
  14. Gina | December 30, 2008 at 4:23 pm

    WTF happened to her ?
    She looks like a pregnant illegel who just crossed the river to drop anchor

    Reply
  15. Fat Lady | December 30, 2008 at 4:27 pm

    Wait, I think this boring day of wanabe posts is done…. LA LA LA LA LA LA LA

    Reply
  16. Fat Lady | December 30, 2008 at 4:27 pm

    Wait, I think this boring day of wanabe posts is done…. LA LA LA LA LA LA LA

    Reply
  17. Fat Lady | December 30, 2008 at 4:27 pm

    Wait, I think this boring day of wanabe posts is done…. LA LA LA LA LA LA LA

    Reply
  18. Parker | December 30, 2008 at 4:27 pm

    Look how her butt can’t help revealing itself beneath her dress. I would bend her over and wedge my cock into her tight little ass then pick her up off the floor and buttfuck her in the air.

    Reply
  19. p0nk | December 30, 2008 at 4:34 pm

    how’d she get famous again? oh yeah, playing a cheating housewife on TV.

    18. I’m sure i speak for all the men here when i express how grateful i am for your daily sex tips.

    Reply
  20. Deacon Jones | December 30, 2008 at 5:03 pm

    @19

    Hahaha, that is a pretty funny visual though.

    Reply
  21. Boris M | December 30, 2008 at 5:23 pm

    Who give a shit what that UGLY, DWARFISH, VILE, ZERO-INTEGRITY WHORE has to say. Fucking ape-woman must have sucked a tractor-trailer of dicks to get where she is.

    Reply
  22. tp | December 30, 2008 at 5:27 pm

    This bitch thinks she’s all that and she’s fucking UGLY!!!

    Reply
  23. Sway | December 30, 2008 at 5:34 pm

    @18

    Couldnt agree with you more and couldnt help but actually laugh out loud to the thought of that

    Reply
  24. woodhorse | December 30, 2008 at 5:51 pm

    She must have got that way after her LAP BAND because she cheats all the time.

    Reply
  25. Sheva | December 30, 2008 at 7:17 pm

    She’s looking more the boring bitchy soccer mom with each passing day.
    And she sucks monkey balls. And sometimes Tony Parker’s.

    What the hell was that guy thinking. Oh yeah, wow, I like anal and she lets me.
    Idiot.

    Look at that rat face and tell me she ain’t nuthing but trouble. And misery day after day when she’s spending all your money and looking more and more like her true crap self.

    Reply
  26. bogman | December 30, 2008 at 10:11 pm
  27. coffee fiend | December 31, 2008 at 12:23 am

    simply amazing, this lady

    Reply
  28. gerard Vandenberg | December 31, 2008 at 12:35 am

    The “almost famous” syndrom has arrived here, folks!!
    ……………………………THE SUNGLASSES!!

    Reply
  29. friendlyfires | December 31, 2008 at 1:19 am

    Hypocrite!
    Known fact that now women cheat more than men (ratio 3:2).
    Can’t wait for someone to turn her ass her in when they find out she’s been fooling around with both the Frito Bandito and the Keebler Elf. She got tired of climbing up regular guy’s legs just to hump their kneecaps. Occassionally , she has to get wild with her own kind. Imaginary television imps.

    Reply
  30. Yank and wank they rhyme for a reason | December 31, 2008 at 2:13 pm

    Known fact to who asswipe? cheating men who want to justify it with lying stats? Bullshit you moronic probably American prick. However American = Moron which the world accepts as fact :)

    Reply
  31. Parker | December 31, 2008 at 3:25 pm

    Brits = boorish prigs which the world accepts as fact :)

    Reply
  32. Miss | December 31, 2008 at 3:28 pm

    #9 your wrong, most men like tall women. but what’s up with all the short comments, she’s the same height as Reese, Jessica Simpon and she’s taller then many celebs like Kylie M who is 5 foot tall and Christina Augliara who is 5’1.

    Reply
  33. devilsrain | January 1, 2009 at 12:27 am

    what makes this idiot think her husband isnt cheating on her 24/7. Another dumb old woman blinded by her obsessive thoughts. “NOT MY MAN” fucking moron

    Reply
  34. George W Bush | January 1, 2009 at 4:16 pm

    Her ass looks like two bowling balls in a garbage bag! If this photo was taken in a sporting goods store I think the picture could be used as evidence.

    Reply
  35. Typical | January 1, 2009 at 10:13 pm

    Typical Hispanic chick mentality.. I used to teach in a predominantly hispanic high school and trust me all the “ritas are bitches and snitches. This sounds like a warning to Tony P. if you ask me.

    Reply
  36. bayan iç giyim | October 20, 2009 at 9:16 am

    She’s wearing the spanx again

    Reply
  37. Tim | January 22, 2010 at 12:13 am

    hahahaha what a pair of racitst wankers you are! Slagging her off because she’s a petite Mexican? you only wish you could have such a stunning lady in your bed.
    Lola, I totally agree, I’m 6′ 4” and my wife is 5′ 1”. Just perfect!

    Reply

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