Courtney Love Apologizes To Frances Bean For Saying She Banged Dave Grohl

“Lousy gummint always tryin’ to steal my baby. Stop touchin’ me, Obama!”

Last week, heroin told Courtney Love it’d be an awesome idea to go on Twitter and accuse Dave Grohl of banging Frances Bean because he’s always been “sexually obsessed” with Kurt Cobain. Except here comes the amazing part of this story. Courtney Love actually had the mental wherewithal to realize she probably shouldn’t have done that (and will need money in the future), so just assume this “apology” happened during that brief 10-15 seconds before she stumbled into another opium den i.e. her bathroom. Via Twitter

Bean, sorry I believed the gossip.. Mommy loves you

And by gossip, Courtney Love of course means drugs. “Bean, sorry I believed the drugs.” And maybe reminding Frances Bean that Courtney is her biological mother wasn’t the best move either. In fact, she should just tweet this instead:

Bean, I stole you from a hospital nursery and mailed you the address of your real birth parents so you never have to directly interact with my crazy ever again. But just to be safe I also purchased this shotgun. Mostly to get Dave Grohl to try and fuck me like your father. I mean, that guy we lived with for a while who in no way impregnated me with you. Be cool XOXO

(You’re welcome.)

Photos: Pacific Coast News, Splash News