Courteney Cox and David Arquette Split

Further solidifying my theory that Jennifer Aniston is relationship cancer, Courteney Cox and David Arquette have separated, according to TMZ. The two met on the set of Scream and, oddly enough, are currently wrapping the fourth chapter which has to be some sort of clever metaphor for their marriage that I’m going to completely miss because I write penis jokes on the Internet.

“Dragged on for way too long?” — Too blunt.

“A stab to the heart?” — Overdramatic.

“I wonder if Hayden Panettiere gets naked.” — SWISH.

Photos: Splash News