Christina Aguilera isn’t pregnant

February 21st, 2007 // 194 Comments








  1. kencarlo

    oh, good.

  2. MissRandom

    Aww…. I was looking to forward to her parenting skills!

  3. kioh


  4. GluttonySpears

    That’s great news.

    Woodhorse should be put on the next truck to Alpo.

  5. Shit, of course she’s not pregnant! You can’t get pregnant from swallowing. Oh, maybe if somebody had told ANS that there wouldn’t be so many paternity questions…

  6. RussianMafia

    How many implant alterations has she had? At least Britney is raw, which is more human, albeit twisted. I like Britney better!

  7. MrSemprini

    Ten years ago, I would have put good money on Christina doing the rehab circuit and Britney being a sweet little pop princess. Wow, was I wrong. I mean, not just wrong but really wrong.

  8. MrSemprini

    BTW, when did she get the monkey?

  9. kamihi

    I think she’ll be like Madonna with her career she ain’t going down the Britney path, I don’t like her but thats how I see it.

  10. TheLegend68


  11. tomdeleteseverypageimake

    britney will get pregnant and leave rehab about 2387469823746 more times before christina has a kid. there’s a right time and place in someone’s life to start a family and christina seems like she has other priorities right now. yay for her

  12. jFp

    I know Christina is not preggers yet becos’ she is still requesting I fedx large amounts of my goo to her everyday. Of course she could be bathing in it but I think she is using a turkey baster shaped like my johnny.

  13. KimberWolf

    At least we know she’s not into looks!

    He must be able to handle a bullwhip like a matador.

  14. D'oh Eyes

    @10 Simma down there, psycho. How would her getting pregnant make her a whore? She’s married, isn’t she? And if she did keep her legs shut, she’d be a pretty crappy wife.

  15. TheLegend68

    #14 What the fuck has being married got to do with it??? Is it ok for married women to produce sprogs???? People like you are contributing to the end of this planet.

  16. kathleen170

    She has so much make-up caked on that it’s disgusting. Her looks are significantly over-rated.

  17. woodhorse

    ah, Wally, you had me with the poem, OXOXOXOX

  18. sk8trgurl69

    I think it’s funny, that a couple years ago:

    Everybody(well most everybody) was Britney-obsessed, she had everything, hbo promos, her own doll, a movie, the works.

    At the same time everyone thought “xTina” was a total slut bag. Which she probably was, and still is(come on, look at her hubby).

    Now look at the two. Wow, how much difference a couple of years makes!

    Goodbye, Britney. Your welcome to stay Christina…

  19. Thank God.

    I can’t afford to pay that woman child support.

  20. woodhorse

    #14 – a good guess is that TheLegend(in his own mind)68(actual age) is in real life a man (formally known as Wiseman) who pulls the heads off kittens to put his meat puppet into….He’s been kicked off at least once. Go complain to Fish.

  21. These days all the big celebs are doing work for charity or to help out humanity or shit like that. Apparently somebody lied to Christina and told her that being seen in public with a guy that looks that bad qualifies. And I don’t see her getting pregnant. She’ll leave this doofis and adopt a black baby from some foreign country.

  22. D'oh Eyes

    @15 I’m going to assume that you’re just playing around being psychotic.

    So it’s wrong for women to have children? I think it was wrong for your mother to have you since you turned out to be a psychopath. I don’t know how having children within a loving marriage is contributing to the end of the planet, particularly in the light of the fact that the birth rate in Western civilization is dropping below the replenish rate. But I’m going to guess that logic is lost on you. I imagine that you have the aesthetic qualities and mental capabilities of a hermaphrodite troll with a bad case of dysentery. Tootles!

  23. With an ugly husband like that, I wouldn’t be pregnant either …

  24. BarbadoSlim

    Ratboy here is the luckiest mofo on the planet. About 60 years ago he would have been roasting at a steady 475 degrees somewhere near Bavaria.

    Tap that ass

  25. TheLegend68


  26. This reminds me of the time I spent 3 months in Attica and when I got out I swore I was pregnant until my butcher told me that I just have a huge ass!

    Get it? My ass grew and I thought I was pregnant from all the anal sex I had in prison. Come on Rich you know that ‘cracked’ you up. Holy shit ‘cracked’ you up. Get it? I’m too much. There’s no stopping me baby.

    Now it’s time to smile to myself as I hit: Post Your Comment.

  27. wetpanties

    She looks like a blow up doll. Do those come in “hollywood crackwhore” style?

  28. RichPort

    You can tell it’s the real RichPort because I’m FUNNY!!!

  29. supafreak

    I’ve seent this guy a few times but never looking this pathetic. I have a feeling there’s two cocks in this marriage.

  30. danielle

    Okay, she is gorgeous, and he’s an ugly Jew.

    I can’t believe Jew married that guy, Christina! He must have big junk in the garage.

  31. TheLegend68

    #22……….This planet is overpopulated. How the fuck will the human race end if these sluts keep on producing ugly little sprogs?

  32. TheLegend68

    #20……..Go and suck on dog dick you sick freak. You need to piss off from here you loser.

  33. magickal

    He really is one fugly Jew.

    As an aside, does anyone think that Christina is LOVING what’s going on in Shitney’s world right now? I’ll bet she had no idea when whe was sticking those little pins in those dolls all those years ago just how damaging the outcome would be.

  34. D'oh Eyes

    Am I correct that the term sprog is used predominantly by the British? So that would make you a hermaphrodite troll with a bad case of dysentery AND bad teeth. Carry on.

  35. -Stormy.

    Her upper arms are too thick. Otherwise she’s looking good.

  36. laura79

    He is a little bit Shane MacGowan looking.

  37. D'oh Eyes

    Christina, do your hubby a favor and take him into the Mystic tan booth with you next time you go. Boy needs some color.

  38. ponk

    legend, just because your mom didn’t have any children that lived, doesn’t mean that other women shouldn’t be allowed to bear offspring.

  39. shakeitout

    go fuck yourself, danielle.

  40. sumnersgal

    Wah?!?! 40!

  41. biatcho

    whoa, woodhorse you have to be seriously fucked up for Legendary WiseMan to call you a “sick freak”, man that’s hilarious!

    When did Christina whatever her spanish last name is start dating Dave Gahan from Depressed Mode?

  42. JungleRed

    She looks smokin’ hot. She’s really working that dress. And poor Jordan looks like he’s hanging on for dear life. Can you blame him?

  43. woodhorse

    Hey Wally – you know those baskets of free peanuts they leave at the bar? And you know when the bar is really really crowded it is like wall-to-wall people? And then you throw a peanut over your shoulder into the crowd and, taking a sip of your drink, you spin around on your barstool to face the crowd with this look on your face like you’re trying to see if you know anyone but really you’re looking at the person who is holding their scalp and looking at the ceiling? Nah, me neither.

  44. woodhorse

    thanks #41, I do try

  45. RichPort

    She makes my boxers feel pregnant.

  46. TheLegend68

    #34……….Am I correct you’re a dumbshit obese yank?? Typical fattie have shit flowing through their brain.

  47. TheLegend68

    #38……….Please kill yourself. You are beyong saving.

  48. TheLegend68

    #38……Please kill yourself. You are beyond saving.

  49. meee

    i always wonder…just how insecure does one have to be to get a boob job? seriously.

  50. GooniesNeverSayDie

    An X-tina Haiku

    More hair than Brit
    Her husband is butt ugly
    Every Sunday nude

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