Chris Brown Takes It to The Hole

November 19th, 2010 // 44 Comments

Chris Brown was practically fellated by a judge yesterday during his probation hearing for beating the shit out of Rihanna before the 2009 Grammys. RadarOnline reports:

Judge Patricia Schnegg said to Brown, “Of all the probationers I have had, no one has done a better job, or been more consistent than you. You are working diligently.”

I know a lot of people are going to ask, “what more do I want from Chris Brown?” Yes, he’s obviously sticking to his probation and atoning for what he did – in theory – but nothing will change the fact if he wasn’t Chris Brown, he would’ve been in jail. This spoiled brat beat a woman’s head into a car door and bit her in the ear and neck because she dared to get mad about him cheating on her. It’s the ultimate sense of entitlement and what did he learn from it? He’ll get a slap on the wrist and have to pick up some trash along the highway. Except now he knows not to release an album only nine months after his next victim. You gotta wait a least a full year on that shit, and not a second before you moonwalk like Michael. Not a second before.

Photos: Splash News

superficial

  1. jamaican

    1st

  2. jamaican

    3rd

  3. chris brown can suck my balls

    what a fucker

  4. Ksurfiws

    Don’t worry fish. He will do it again. The vindication will feel sweet. But the punches he lands on the poor dumb bitch he beats the shit out of won’t

  5. JD

    “takes it to the hole.”? That’s a hell of a way to talk about Rhianna, Fish.

  6. Cock Dr

    Nice commentary Mr. Blogger.

  7. Black Guy

    As a black man in America, I am thoroughly disgusted by these actions of Mr. Brown and find them completely unforgivable. What he has done tarnishes the reputations and accomplishments of all black men. He should raise the goal up to 10 feet as even a white guy can dunk on an eight foot goal.

  8. I wonder if she count him chucking deuces as community service.

  9. Domestic violence is no small matter but im with the judge on this one. Chris did what he was told to and then some. Sure rihannas face had some cuts, but lets not eggagerate the extent of her injuries. She wasnt outright pummelled. Ive run a good share of domesic violence calls as an emt and rihanna could have looked a lot worse. Her eyes werent swollen shut like many victims. No broken bones. No black rings that would signify brain trauma. The timing with an award show helped blow this out of proportion. If he does it again then fine lock his ass up for a year or two. If not then assume some of it was her too. Way it read initially she threw the first punch. That makes her guilty of assault and battery too.

    • jc

      you should have stopped your comment at “small matter”.

    • molly

      it doesn’t matter if she was outright pummelled or not.. the fact remains that he beat the crap out of a chick in anger. whether she just has cuts and bruises or she ends up in a coma, dudes still a fuckin psycho. normal people don’t do that shit.

      • He heat her yes. He didnt beat the crap outa her tho. Theres a difference. I dont like taking devils advocate here on a sensitive issue but be fair on both sides. She comes off as a thug too.

      • loler

        dude seriously wtf so ur saying if u kidnap someone and torture them consistently for 3 weeks causing agonising pain that will fuck you up forever, its ok as long as while youre torturing them you dont go all out and actually damage their skin, thats taking it too far. you are one fucked up gimp, no domestic violence is ok. so you would you beat a kid, but only if u didnt break any ribs? sick muthafucka

      • Wtf is right. Youre reducing this to an absurdity. He didnt kidnap her and torture her for 3 weeks. He hit her back when she started hitting him im a car. Not premeditated. Not grevious bodily harm. Its a misdemeanor battery in most states. All i was getting at. Meawhile most reports make it sound like he pinned her down and went medieval on her. Well he didnt.

    • umm

      Are you conveniently forgetting that he choked her until she almnost passed out? That’s pretty fucking bad. However, I agree that if she attacked him, she too is guilty. I don’t agree with this bs that women should just have some sort of free pass to hit and scratch a man, and not get called on it. But on the other other hand, if she just busted the douchebag cheating on her, than her actions, however guilty, are understandable. In sum, there are no innocent parties in the equation

  10. Really

    I will never understand the people who defend douche bags like this by saying they did their time. Since when does getting caught committing a vicious crime and being forced to do manual labor or jail time magically make them better people? If Michael Vick or Paris Hilton or Lindsay Lohan or any of the other celebrity scumbags hadn’t been caught, they’d most likely still be doing what they were doing.

    oh, and to dudeatdude:

    ““Robyn F turned to face Brown and punched her in the left eye with right hand. He then drove away in the vehicle and continued to punch her in the face with his right hand while steering the vehicle with his left hand. The assault caused Robyn F Osmouth to fill with blood and blood to splatter all over her clothing and the interior of the vehicle. Brown looked at Robyn F and stated “I am going to beat the s–t out of you when we get home! You wait and see!?”

    “She then bent over at the waist placing her elbows and face near her lap and in attempt to protect her face and head from the barrage of punches being levied by Brown. Brown continued to punch Robyn F on her left arm and hands, causing her to suffer a contusion on her left triceps that was approx 2 inches in diameter and numerous contusions on her left hand.”

    “Brown did not know what she did with the key and began punching her in the face and arms. Brown began applying pressure to Robyn F left and right carotid arteries causing her to be unable to breath. She began to lose consciousness. She reached up with her left hand and began to attempting to gauge his eyes in attempt to flee herself. Brown bit her left ring and middle fingers and released her. While brown continued to punch her she turned around a place her back to against the passenger door.”

    …that’s what I would call beating the shit out of someone. He even directly threatens to “beat the shit” out of her when they get home. Great career choice, by the way. It’s good to know that an EMT is sticking up for a proven woman beater, and even blaming the victim. It doesn’t matter how she “comes off”, it matters that he beat her as thoroughly as he could while still driving, and clearly planned to continue to do so once they got home. The fact that he didn’t injure her as severely as he could have means nothing more than that he even sucks at being an abusive asshole.

    • mud butt

      @Really Nice job. But don’t expect a re from dudescatdude. He runs from fact and reason faster than roaches after switching on the light.

      • mud butt

        Or should I say: don’t expect a *coherent* re…

      • hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…………………

        If its a recent post i respond when (1) its on topic (2) not a sixth rerun since monday of the same point about the fuckin falcons. they’re up a game on the giants midseason. whoopdefuckin do. id sign this in mongoloid too now if i knew how, but– get over it. that’s how ny felt about dallas a week ago. what if those rams tie u back up with ny. or someone a week or two from now.

        but back to brown..

        let me repeat i’m not sticking up for his behaviour, nor blaming her. what i said was the wounds were relatively superficial. and that she allowed them to be played up in the spotlight.

        and unless this becomes some pattern mo on brown’s part then fuckin move on. he seems contrite. call it the christian thing to do.

        now fuck off and have a nice weekend

    • teal

      When you a lion up, expect to get bitten.

      I love reading people complain about Chris Brown. The kid’s reputation is tarnished enough as it is. Truthfully, I feel terrible for the guy. I feel even worse when he tries to pull off some corny stunt to try to show how he’s “changed.” Chris Brown deserves a second chance because, in life, we all deserve second chances.

      A man should never put his hands on a woman, but the same goes for women as well. Allot of people seem to disregard the fact that Rhianna actually initiated the physical contact with Brown by slapping and striking him. That, in my opinion, is complete and utter bullshit. I do not respect a man who hits a woman, but I cannot respect a woman who hits a man either. The reality is that Rhianna kinda got what was coming to her. And to blame all of this on Chris Brown is ridiculous.

      And before all of you crazy lunnies goes of on me about how I “support” abuse towards women, I don’t. My wife is my everything and I would kill myself before I ever put my hands on her and the same goes for my daughters.

      • teal

        When you wake a lion up*

      • absinthe

        “The reality is that Rhianna kinda got what was coming to her. ”

        Yeah ok, when a man beats you, come back and tell us how much you got what was coming to you and how much he should be given a second chance. Brown got what was coming to him after he chose to give her those two black eyes – to lose his career and be shut out by most of society, which is how it should stay.

      • teal

        You see, absinthe, that’s the problem. There should have NEVER BEEN any physical abuse coming from either side. When Rhianna hit him, it doesn’t matter if he was a man, a woman or an animal. The fact of the matter is that she hit him and that opened a can of crap that was unfortunately headed her way. No one, and I mean no one, has the right to put their hands on another person in a relationship.

        Absinthe you fail to take into account the details before the beating. That’s just as important, if not more important, than the actual event itself. Again, they are both at fault, not just Chris Brown.

  11. AZrock

    I have always felt as if there was more to this story than told. They are both suck-azz half-azz performers, but the mental makeup of any woman that would support this human-ass munch is beyond me. Forgiveness is a virtue so for what he did he should be forgiven, but he still does not get it. If his monkey-azz was one shade darker he would be in the joint also. Why the fuck do I care, oh that’s right, dissertation material…

    • N)crooklyn

      Wow. His monkey-ass? Well be sure to include racist CockSucker under “your name”on your dissertation. You fuck! Stay in Arizona, boy.
      And Chris Brown is still a girl abusing piece of shit who should be in prison! Its his $$$ not color!

    • N)crooklyn

      Wow. His monkey-ass? Well be sure to include racist CockSucker under ” name”on your dissertation. You fuck! Stay in Arizona, boy.
      And Chris Brown is still a girl abusing piece of shit who should be in prison! Its his $$$ not color!

      • AZrock

        Ha Ha, actually Canadian “now” doing research on the ignorance of American culture. Monkey-AZZ – a term we used in the south when referring to anyone regardless of race, therefore it fits an ignorant, self-promoting, professional A-hole like C Brown. I won’t stoop to your level, but as a “brutha” I can call C-Brown, Russell Simmons, Tyler Perry or any of the other Negro-ocity whatever I fell like, but thanks for responding.
        Peace.
        P.S. yes he is a cocksucker, so we are in agreement…

  12. He’s NOT A cocksucker. If he was, he’d have beaten up Jake Gyllenhall or Ricky Martin or something like that LOL.

    He’s an idiot. Beating women, unforgivable. Wanna know what’s messed up? Some woman will give this guy another chance and the second she ‘gets out of line’ in his eyes, the ol’ anger will come back.

  13. absinthe

    Well said, Fish. Well said.

  14. tom

    why they crop out the mini trampoline?

  15. Let.It.Go.

    Okay, we’re going into almost 2 years here. He can’t spend the rest of his life living in misery for one stupid mistake. He was young when this incident happened and he is still young and has a lot of growing up to do. Will he ever hurt another woman again? Probably not. I sure hope not. I think the fallout from all of this has taught him a very valuable lesson. What I do find repulsing, however, is how everyone seems to conveniently forget that Rihanna assaulted Chris as well and initiated physical abuse. We have no idea what happened their night or what their relationship was like the whole time they were together. She could’ve been beating on him the whole time and that night he just got to the point where he had enough and finally lashed out on here. Who knows? We never will. And that’s why we should move along, just as they’ve both tried to do. It happened to them…affected them…didn’t change shit in my world. So if they can get past it, why can’t I? Same goes for everyone else. “I’m on some new shit…”

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  17. A Real Black Guy

    This Superficial writer is starting to sound like a little bitch by repeatedly heaping on Chris Brown – now they’re whining about him not having to go to jail… who gives a fuck?!? There are plenty of celebrities and politicians (the majority of which are white) that get light sentencing when committing crimes – yet I don’t see any of them being piled on like Chris Brown has (by this website anyway). I don’t condone what he did but the man deserves a chance to move on! Steve Nash announced a divorce from his wife the day after they had a baby and I haven’t seen one fucking blurb on here about it… yet Chris Brown picks up a basketball and the Superficial starts saying the same bullshit over and over.

    • molly

      yeah, beating the crap out of your girlfriend and amicably divorcing your wife are very similar.

      ps maybe you’ve missed the 2x daily lindsay lohan posts since like, 200-fuckin-7. you’re right tho, superficial never harps on how retarded white people are. only black guys

  18. NatTurner

    Hey loser that wrote this story. Mel Gibson beat the mother of his child, Charlie Sheen put a knife to his wife’s neck, Ben Roethlisberger raped two women. All three of these men have not spent 10 minutes in jail, they are not even on probabtion and they are all over 35. Chris Brown was 19 when he punched Rhianna’s ass fro grabbing the wheel of that car. How do you hold a 19 year old in more contempt than the aforementioned old ass brats? Typical!

  19. wim

    …………JACKSON(hole)?

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