Despite labeling his past two episodes “Torpedoes of Truth” and calling them “sermons,” Charlie Sheen is now trying to claim his new Ustream show “Sheen’s Korner” is entirely fictional after finding out Brooke Mueller planned to use them as evidence in their custody battle. Whoops! #PlanBetter RadarOnline reports:
“It’s a character in a piece of fiction. … Think Lenny Bruce or the Mitchell Bros. It’s part of my shtick.”
… As we previously reported, Mueller’s legal team of Sorrell Trope and Lori Howe will use that webcast to make an argument that the embattled actor is spiraling out of control.
Responding to that, Sheen told RadarOnline.com: “OK, well they should use Two and Half Men to say I am a drunk and sleep with wh*res. That’s all I am gonna say. That’s my answer. Bring it. It’s so f*cking stupid, if that’s the best they’ve got.“
First off, I’m pretty sure Charlie’s 800 interviews covered that part about sleeping with whores. As for this being “the best they’ve got,” I don’t think it gets any better in a custody hearing than video evidence of a violent drug addict saying he wants to cut the throats of children. So now Charlie has to decide: Is he delivering pure warlock truth to his followers or is he trying to hawk Tiger Blood T-shirts by pretending he’s imparting winning knowledge? I understand the people who still worship him at this point are technically retarded because even the libertarians realized this shit is getting ridiculous and this was like porn to them, but eventually he either has to actually decapitate an enemy or somehow land a job that pays as much or more than Two and a Half Men to prove he had the best plan all along. Otherwise, congratulations, you’re just another junkie who got fired from his job, except with a million Twitter followers because people want to laugh at you spectacularly killing yourself in a fit of crazy talk. (I’ve got twenty on his last words being “Minotaur balls.”)
Photos: Pacific Coast News