Carrie Fisher Confirms She’s In ‘Star Wars: Ep. VII’

March 6th, 2013 // 7 Comments
Carrie Fisher Princess Leia
WATCH: This Is What 'Star Wars: Ep. VII' Is Turning Into
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Mark Hamill
Mark Hammil's Probably In 'Ep. VII,' Too Read More »

Last week, Carrie Fisher was hospitalized after going bananas on a cruise ship, and before that, her publicist had to issue a statement telling everyone not to listen to a word Carrie Fisher says about Star Wars: Episode VII which should qualify her for real this time confirmation about playing Princess Leia again as more crazy talk. Except thanks to Mark Hamill we now know that Disney is really trying to reboot Cocoon, so they better get their shit together before Wilford Brimley kicks the bucket. (Helpful hint: He likes oatmeal.) Via io9:

In an interview with Palm Beach Illustrated Carrie Fisher was asked point blank if she was returning to Star Wars and she answered quite frankly.
 
Disney is going to continue the Star Wars saga, producing movies set to hit theaters starting in 2015. Can you confirm whether you’ll reprise the role of Princess Leia?
Yes.
What do you think Princess Leia is like today?
Elderly. She’s in an intergalactic old folks’ home [laughs]. I just think she would be just like she was before, only slower and less inclined to be up for the big battle.

DISNEY EXEC: Alright, Mr. Abrams, razzle dazzle me.
J.J. ABRAMS: Okay, what if, and try to really picture this, all the characters everyone loved from their childhood are old and almost offensive to look at? Plus every line they say will be a blatant wink and a nod to the audience that takes you right out of the movie.
DISNEY EXEC: Wow. I’m going to be frank with you, J. Mind if I call you, J? The other guys are going to hate this, but I’m into granny porn to the point that I see a therapist, so I’ll go ahead and greenlight this provided you don’t tell a fucking soul until we’ve already spent a ton of money and it’s way too late.
J.J. ABRAMS: You forget. I’m a master of secrets!
DISNEY EXEC: Which reminds me. End this thing like Lost and I’ll eat your goddamn kids in front of your face. There’s an actual kitchen under Cinderella’s castle that cooks and prepares fresh children every day, and I will take them there if I see one reference to limbo or the after-life or whatever the hell was going on in that last season. I’m literally hungry with anger just thinking about it. *presses intercom* Toddler empanadas. NOW.

(Video via Hollywood Elsewhere)

superficial

  1. brilliant.
    what little kid doesnt love their grandma and grandpa.

  2. Cool. I’ve always wanted to see what futuristic mobility aids will look like.

  3. Inner Retard

    Leia can transfer easily to the new movies. She could be an older stateswoman dispensing advice. That is not to say I’m crazy about this movie turning into a geriatric convention.

    • emma watson's Vagina

      I was thinking of that also. as they put in the surviving members as cameos in The Munsters movie(for TV) and the Lost in Space movie. although currently none of the cast died from SW films(creators such as frank Oz is another matter.:( )

  4. That Bastard Tony

    So right now, someone at LucasArts is creating a digital version of Leia, Luke and Han is a similar fashion to how they made the digital version of Count Dooku for fighting and stunt purposes. I don’t know how I’m going to respond to a elderly Leia moving like someone in their 20′s. Probably with horror.

  5. ThisWillHurt

    “Hurry, Leia! There are stormtroopers closing in on every-”
    “PUT ON MY STORIES!”
    “Goddamnit, did you take your pill? We need to . . . What were we doing?”

  6. So, I’m guessing there won’t be any CGI needed for Jabba the Hutt then?

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