Trailer park crotch-queen Britney Spears is preparing for another child (read: antichrist) after a psychic predicted she’ll fall pregnant again next year.
Britney reportedly always seeks the advice of a medium when she makes major plans for her future. A friend told In Touch magazine that Britney couldn’t resist asking if she’d have another child, and was told that she’d be pregnant again within six months.
Britney would have a much better idea of when she’d get pregnant if she read any fifth-grade biology textbook rather than rolling around in a giant tub of cheetos. People give K-Fed a hard time because he spends so much time away from her, but christ, if my wife’s idea of a good time was sitting around in a pool of grease, watching White Chicks and farting like a horse, I might get the hell out of there too.
Another Baby For Britney? [Contact Music]
conceitedhipster | November 17, 2005 at 11:57 am
Surely, the end is near.
D-Bear | November 17, 2005 at 12:05 pm
There must be a way to save the world from this impending doom.
ElFurbe | November 17, 2005 at 12:26 pm
I, for one, welcome our new Britney-spawn overlords and remind them that as a nobody blog commenter I would be an invalubale source for rounding up people to work in their underground cheeto caves.
suzy | November 17, 2005 at 5:49 pm
Maybe she’s trying to get money for her baby photos this time around, unlike with her first child. Hehe…
catlebrity | November 17, 2005 at 7:02 pm
greasy horse-farts are HOT
Zanathon | November 17, 2005 at 7:24 pm
You know what really concerns me? The fact that she has a few hundred thousand eggs, just waiting to be fertilized, in her pair of ovaries.
If we were to convince Britney to visit the troops in Iraq, we could then expose and expunge the Weapons of Mass Destruction everybody was looking for.
As soon as she starts to sing, “Hit Me Baby, One More Time,” more than a few soldiers will open fire on her and go home valiant heroes.
Jivenut | November 17, 2005 at 8:12 pm
With these two breeding we can all rest easy knowing the world will be filled with people dripping with innate talent and unwavering decision making ability.
Floyd | November 18, 2005 at 6:59 am
I thought she’d kicked that waste-of-space Federline out? Who’s the daddy going to be this time?
A quick visit to Timberlake?
ska_talon | November 18, 2005 at 10:06 am
Fat chicks are gross.
elle | November 18, 2005 at 2:52 pm
haha trailer park crotch-queen.. so true, so true.
oshkoshb-goshdammgosh | November 18, 2005 at 3:37 pm
I just moved to Louisiana, and, it’s true, we do have a special kind of redneck here. Especially the ladies. They necks is awful awful red.
The Scarlet Bitch | November 18, 2005 at 9:51 pm
Horse Farts, Genius :D.
assholic | November 19, 2005 at 4:25 pm
comment # 11. why didn’t it struck to me as news though? oh yeah, coz i knew all along, that’s why.
AmberDextrose | November 21, 2005 at 6:06 am
Oh lovely, lovely Britney – breed on! It would be so awful if you just, like, stopped, leaving us nothn new to feed our car-crash gawing tiny minds on.
becca11 | November 22, 2005 at 2:32 am
she is very self destructive. she must hate her self and not want to be happy
scottsun@sify.com | June 7, 2010 at 8:27 am
I think I found some areas where you can put another picture of Britney … No, wait, it's an ad.