UPDATE: Britney Spears faces questions in custody battle

December 12th, 2007 // 82 Comments

Britney Spears will be questioned in court today by Kevin Federline’s lawyers. She has avoided a deposition four times so far this year, but Kevin’s lawyers finally got the judge to put Britney on the stand. She’ll be drilled on her drug and alcohol use and parenting skills. The process could take several days, according to People:

“A deposition can be emotionally draining, because Kevin’s lawyer can ask very personal questions about her relationship with her kids – and she’ll be under oath,” explains L.A. family lawyer Lynn Soodik, who’s not involved with the case.

This should be some hardcore legal action that makes Law & Order look like your sister’s bike. Pink and fruity but you’ll still ride it to work. Anyway, I’m hoping to see Kevin Federline’s attorneys ask Britney Spears the tough question: When will she show her vagina again? Not that I want to see it or anything. I just happen to have a tarp I’d like to throw over it then possibly hold in place with a staple gun. I guess you can say I’m trying to live up to this WWJD bracelet I stole from a stripper.

UPDATE: Britney Spears is not attending the court hearing today citing a medical condition. Kevin’s lawyers are pissed, according to TMZ. I, on the other hand, think it’s cute they thought Britney would show up without being told there’d be a petting zoo.

superficial

  1. Nikk

    I meant #20, not 23.

  2. veggi

    Make up my mind.

  3. @5 ROFL!

    but seriously it is not cool to make fun of the mentally challenged… not cool

  4. lux

    43- You are so right .

  5. Retard says what…

  6. Correction!

    I meant to direct that comment at #11 ABOUT #5… sorry for the misunderstanding folks

  7. woodhorse

    12 – those are creative juices.

    48 – Anexio is funnier than you

  8. will somebody please answer this one thing. why the FUCK do people say “first.” it drives me absolutely insane. no one gives a shit that you sit at your computer all day long constantly refreshing your browser. its absolutely retarded (not to offend the mentally challenged).

    just stop.

  9. Shallow Val

    PEOPLE I HAVE AN ANNOUNCEMENT!!!!!

    Anexio is pulling all of our legs. It’s a FACAAAAAADE! I got it. It’s all contrived. It’s just too good for anyone of us to avoid responding. It’s just too good, I tell you.

    That’s pretty good, Anexio, or whatever your name is. It may actually be Krazi Hot Kelli. Did y’all ever think of that?

  10. Shallow Val

    PEOPLE I HAVE AN ANNOUNCEMENT!!!!!

    Anexio is pulling all of our legs. It’s a FACAAAAAADE! I got it. It’s all contrived. It’s just too good for anyone of us to avoid responding. It’s just too good, I tell you.

    That’s pretty good, Anexio, or whatever your name is. It may actually be Krazi Hot Kelli. Did y’all ever think of that?

  11. Shallow Val

    All I want to hear on this subject is “will be serving six months in jail for a charge of contempt of court.” That’s all I want for Christmas, Satan.

    Doesn’t that count for anything anymore? Everything she is doing is contemptible. She’s got more infractions than anyone in this room.

  12. grobpilot

    It always amazes me that those individuals with the poorest grasp of the English language (#5) are the ones who try to chastise the rest of us while trying to make what they feel is a legitimate point. Legitimate or not, if you can’t spell, punctuate or string together a coherent sentence, you’d better spend a lot more time studying English and less time giving us a blast of shit.

  13. POOTER

    hey, stickpony (woodhorse)

    if by “creative juices” you mean a serious infection, okay, I’ll go along with that.

    …and your right…anexio is funnier than me…it’s impossible to be funnier than the tragically retarted….HEY! That probably means that YOU”RE FUNNIER THAN ME, TOO! WHEE! Good job, little buddy! Now go strap your safety helmet on and play.

  14. PunkA

    Anexio? Were you the gay dude on “The Birdcage”? Just sayin.

    Nice of Brit to NOT show up again. Sick my arse. She will be out stealing lighters and panties with more Starbucks in an hour. This judge ought to shit can her ass to jail for contempt, because she has zero respect for this legal process. If the women wanted her babies, she’d show up and fight for it work for it. She doesn’t. Now the poor little guys are stuck with K-Fed 24/7 and whichever hoochie is hit it with. Bet 1 boy keeps it together, and the other is a circus freak by age 18.

  15. AL

    A normal mother could already have been invited into Death’s reception area but would still show up at a legal procedure that would move along the process of getting her children restored to her, even if she had to drag herself into the courthouse with her one remaining limb. Why does she even pretend she wants them back?

  16. La La Laura

    ew look at her knees….she needs to invest in a skirt that covers those suckers up! and stop drinking extra grande fraps brit brit! sheesh!

  17. Lal

    I also have to pose the question: What the hell is that white stuff??

  18. boo

    Shallow Val, I was thinking the same thing. Anexio=KraziHotKelli. I have way too much fucking time on my hands.

  19. BunnyButt

    You know, if I ever see those boots in person, I’d be tempted to douse them with gasoline and set them on fire. Preferably with Britney still in them.

    Sorry, having a bad day, totalled the car. Makes me homicidal.

  20. rocky

    ladies and gentlemen I have to she’d some light on the subject regarding the infamous white study on Brits leg. It is none other than my grundle butter. There I said it.

  21. alex

    brindle butter? Is that like taint juice?

  22. The record producer who claimed to have fathered a secret love child with Britney Spears is looking for a woman on the Jewish singles site (MillMatch.com).Britney has been spotted with Rotem throughout 2007, ever since her split with husband Kevin Federline, and last week the music producer claimed to have fathered a child with her. He told a U.S. Weekly “it’s true” when asked whether he had got the troubled pop star pregnant with her third child, although Spears has since rubbished the allegation. But now Rotem seems to be turning on the star. He writes on the dating site that girls “looking to use a guy like me for a music career” are just the type he wants to avoid.

  23. GIVE BRIT HER BABY BACKS

  24. CHILI'S...

    BABY BACK RIBS…!!!

  25. tony415263

    Britney again.. people are still talking about her joining the rich men seeking sugar babies club sugarcupid.com . What a fool woman, a fake news agian!

  26. dave

    lazytown: behind the music

  27. Narcissist

    When’s this pic from? Halloween? Thanksgiving? She doesn’t look as blubbery.

    She’s in disguise, so as not to draw attention to herself.

  28. Melanie

    What is that white stuff all over her legs???

  29. New Yorker

    The white powder is the vagina powder she doused all over to cover the ‘choch’s’ smell.

  30. yesyesyall

    okay, i’ll attest to the fact that she is white trash….but fat?? yeah, she’s not as thin as she was a few years back, when she probably wasn’t eating anything, but she’s definitely not fat…I suspect she’s probably more fit than most of you that dish out these comments. Unfair, disparaging fat remarks about an average, reasonably fit woman is really the epitome of what’s wrong with our society’s perception of body image-it’s fucking distorted.

  31. Wilder K. Wight

    Is it just me, or is Britney Spears holding a cup from Starbucks in EVERY photo I see of her?

    Weird. . .

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