Britney Spears is mentally handicapped to the point that at 31-years-old her dad is still her legal guardian because she can’t even perform such basic tasks as signing a check or not using her children’s heads for ashtrays. So of course she goes to church. Which, in her defense, makes perfect sense because where else can you go each week to get free juice and stories with talking donkeys in them like on Shrek? “They alls got one with a whale, too!” There’s one with a whale, too.
Photos: Fame/Flynet, Splash News
The new trendy thing in Hollywood these days? A pet peacock.
“OK, who put the half eaten cheeseburger in the collection plate?”
I bet going to church made the 666 on her scalp very irritated.
The pastor: “Now let us pray, that Britney will learn to wear underwear with a skirt. Cuz I am definitely seeing bush. Help me Jesus. Amen”.
She wore a bra to church? Are we sure this is Britney Spears?
I gotta say, when the woman in front of you at church is wearing a sheer-backed blouse with a lacy hot-pink bra underneath, it’s kind of hard to drive the impure thoughts out of your mind and focus on the Christ.
Retard, schmetard – gams still awesome.
Here, here!
Britney’s still better than average looking, and very rich, so she shouldn’t have too much trouble finding a man.
Yes, for that special dude that can handle both legal guardianship and romantic interest she is a mega-catch.
She may be a little thick, both mentally and torso wise but her legs are GREAT!
Enrico Colantoni is not impressed.
It makes perfect, practical sense for Brit-brit to pick up men at church, since they always need an exorcism shortly after their third date.
Nothing like a fuck me now mini skirt to wear to church.
She is still cute as hell and with her being rather stupid it bodes well for any man that can get near her.
I concur, totally! I always thought she looked good even when she didn’t look good.
At least she’s not wearing those fucking boots.
Church is just right for her intelligence level.
I’d be willing to take a Jason Trawick Bertney gig for a year.
Get her cheeseburgers, fried chicken, chicken nuggets and Starbucks.
Sex her up a couple of times a week (she was a dancer, so even with the drugs she’s till got to be half good).
Pick up 20% of her yearly take as manager/guardian (she made about $58 million last year).
Get her to dump me after a year, pick up my$11 million and hop a plane out of town.
Britney, please go to VS and have them properly fit you for a bra. Your boob should not sag that low even with a bra!
I’m sorry but I am pretty sure if she asked me too; I would
Not a big deal. She looks fine!
I want to go the church where the crazy bitches dress like this.
Must be one hell of a church. Imagine what the choir wears!
Ha! Talking donkeys & juice that is supposed to be Jesus’ blood. Also sex with daddy. (Lot, right). Why not don a miniskirt????
So is what’s appropriate for Church what Jesus said? “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these.” Lilies are dressed in splendor, not other spun clothes. The Essene Gospel of Peace was hidden in the Vatican’s archives until the 1900’s. In it, Jesus reportedly says, “”Seek the fresh air of the forest and of the fields… Put off your shoes and your clothing… Then breathe long and deeply.” Wherever that’s legal, I guess? Nag Hammadi Scriptures were banned centuries ago, hidden by monks, and more recently recovered. The Perfect Discourse says, “the mystery of intercourse is performed in secret… For if it happens in the presence of those who do not understand the reality, (it is) laughable and unbelievable.” Regarding Britney’s sexual life and aspects, is their mystery like splendrous clothing surrounding intimate acts that can involve sacred feelings? How appropriate is it to analyze her clothing in the context of the aftermath of the nation discussing her sexual life, in the name of helping her?
Surprised she didn’t burst into flames just walking into the church.
Britney is beautiful