Bertney Spears And Her Boyfen Are Official, Y’All

March 25th, 2013 // 15 Comments

Britney Spears and David Lucado have been spotted together a lot lately, but it’s never really been confirmed that he’s her boyfriend. Not to mention he looks like one of her bodyguards, hangs back like one of her bodyguards and the Shamrock Shakes were out which is usually when she needs another bodyguard. Except here they are holding hands on Friday before making things official by jetting off to Vegas for meatballs, the most romantical of meals Britney can think of after she sawr it in a movie once. “Now push that there meatball with yer nose, and then when I slurp my s’ghetti, you gnobble this here other end till ya kiss me on the mouf. Didj’all know that’s where babies come from? Cray-see.”

Photos: AKM-GSI

superficial

  1. Joe Blow

    Who is “Bertney”?

  2. Norm S. Boner

    this “let’s make every headline sound like hillbilly talk” is getting pretty old….

  3. Britney Spears New Boyfriend David Lucado Holding Hands
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    “I love you, Britney.”
    “I love you, guy who makes me look normal.”

  4. that lucky bastard…

  5. Britney Spears New Boyfriend David Lucado Holding Hands
    Commented on this photo:

    Federline 2.0

  6. Nicole Brown-Simpson

    Well… at least he’s a better choice than that manipulative geriatric batterer she was hangin’ with earlier.

  7. Truth be told, I AM just a little bit jealous. I kept expecting her to show up at my front door, begging me to tear off her clothes, suck her titties to implode status, and murder her vagina.

  8. Dunno, man; I’ve just scrolled down from what appears to be an Armenian cross between a black bear and a blowfish, and this looks fine to me in comparison.

  9. wtf is that outfit – a suit jacket, no tie, sleeves rolled up, a vest that matches nothing else he’s wearing, ripped jeans and a ball cap? She pays him to walk around with her so she looks normal by comparison, right? Maybe they’re both just retarded.

  10. Britney Spears New Boyfriend David Lucado Holding Hands
    Mama Pinkus
    Commented on this photo:

    they look happy…..I wish them luck

  11. Britney Spears New Boyfriend David Lucado Holding Hands
    grobpilot
    Commented on this photo:

    They both got dressed in the dark, didn’t they?

  12. Britney Spears New Boyfriend David Lucado Holding Hands
    Captain Kickass
    Commented on this photo:

    Sweet hat and sport coat combo, douchbag.

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