Bikinis. As Far As The Eye Can See…

October 19th, 2010 // 68 Comments

Because I’m a whirling dervish of ambition and work ethic, here’s pretty much every single “celebrity” that was in a bikini over the weekend which I’m only just now getting to on account of Lady GaGa actually eating, and GQ forcing me to acknowledge the existence of Glee. Also, for the record, alcohol barely even factored into this equation. Although it may have had a hand in this one:

X + Gin = (My Car’s in the Neighbor’s Pool)^Sambuca

You’re right, this isn’t a science blog. On to the ladies:

AnnaLynne McCord [90210, This site in a bikini.]
Jamie-Lynn Sigler [The Sopranos, Giving Turtle a handjob.]
Taryn Manning [Sons of Anarchy, Crossroads]
Whitney Port [Her father invented port wine cheese?]
Shenae Grimes [... I needed five chicks to round the thumbnails out.]

Photos: Flynet, Splash News

superficial

  1. cc

    That girl in red might appeal to Roman Polanski but I’d prefer something with a little more meat.

  2. direchef

    Gaga eating something as pedestrian as a cheeseburger is sobering news, but you’re dropping the (high)ball. Go out for some Car Bombs and paid-for sex.

  3. Jimmy D

    I’d stick my penis in her vagina, if you know what I mean.

  4. Whitney Port in a Bikini
    Mike Walker
    Commented on this photo:

    Is she bow-legged?

  5. ilu

    Wow that is a pretty unflattering picture of Shanae Grimes….and I think Annalynne looks good, she’s gained some weight.

  6. fester

    Thanks fish, this makes up for the J-Lo post. Too bad the J-Lo pics made me gouge out my eyes.

  7. hellokittylover

    The girl in red isn’t even skinny. she’s slim and toned.

  8. aobetter

    I’d stick my penis in her vagina, if you know what I mean.

  9. Danklin

    I dont get the fascination with this Annalynne Mccord chick. She has a weird ass body. Her naval is nasty and looks like a little penis and she her eyes are sunk too far in her head. not hot at all.

  10. Whitney Port in a Bikini
    nom nom nom
    Commented on this photo:

    whitney port.. hubba hubba

  11. whew

    Poor thing. She has a nasty case of mosquito bites, Ethiopia ribs, and Uncut Umbilicusness. Sad. And Gross.

  12. Taryn Manning in a Bikini
    Gah
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks mentally disabled every time I see her. Now she looks fat too.

  13. Whitney Port in a Bikini
    Gah
    Commented on this photo:

    His shorts are gay

  14. Ash Bones

    I wonder what could get off faster, that bikini or my penis….hmmm??

  15. captain america

    the “Shepperd” forgot to give her T*TS?

  16. anallynne for the win (tho her bellybutton borders on ripa)

    • Team Whitney (whoever the hell she is…actress?). Very nice indeed.
      The McCord chick is decent but just too damn skinny. Plus she has horseteeth; looks like she could eat an apple thru a chainlink fence.
      The others…..well, thanks for trying & I hope they all enjoyed their drink n sun sessions.

  17. ingress

    My newspaper wrapped on my porch every morning has more curves than Anna Lynn McCord

    Hell I think the Saturday edition might weigh more than her as well

  18. Taryn Manning in a Bikini
    Rough skills & power tools
    Commented on this photo:

    Looking good zelweegies….

  19. AnnaLynne McCord in a Bikini
    Jerkbags
    Commented on this photo:

    Die

    • Jerkbags

      I should clarify that this was in response to some douchebag spammer. Fish should remove the entire comment tree otherwise stuff dont make sense no more

  20. It’s about time we got some celebs in bikinis back up in here. It’s been so long, I had to pull a dried plug of lotion out of the dispenser on my Jergens.

    Oh, and by the way, that chick in the red bikini better put some quality time in on the treadmill. What a heifer!

    (Look at me, Fish! I’m generating “debate” on the forums!)

  21. Shenae Grimes in a Bikini
    yawn
    Commented on this photo:

    we get it you’re fat…

  22. RoboZombie

    Is this a joke? Who ARE these hags??

  23. Shenae Grimes in a Bikini
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks painful.

    • reformed_druid

      It looks like one of those really old school girdles and the worst invention ever for small breasted women, the tube top.

  24. AnnaLynne McCord in a Bikini
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks cold as well as underweight.

  25. Shenae Grimes in a Bikini
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Worst “bikini” ever. For gawds sake, admit you don’t have the best figure for that & get a nice fitting one piece.

  26. Banana

    Boys in bikinis? Is this what the superficial is into now?

  27. AnnaLynne McCord in a Bikini
    Chubby
    Commented on this photo:

    Look at those TEETH!

  28. Shenae Grimes in a Bikini
    ilu
    Commented on this photo:

    that bikini is from American Apparel! I have the top. And yes, the bottoms are terrible.

  29. Deacon Jones

    I think I would start mumbling, faint, and explode in my pants before I got within 10 feet of Anna Lyne.

    PHHHeewwwww!

  30. Rocky's Bullwinkle

    Anna doesn’t look like she smells. She looks good!

  31. Anna Wintour

    she looks great

  32. See Alice

    Not bad Anallynne, not bad .

  33. Willy Wonka

    I have bigger tits than her….and I’m an 8yr old boy!

  34. Shenae Grimes in a Bikini
    Cardinal Fang
    Commented on this photo:

    A mix of past and future bikinis

  35. AnnaLynne McCord in a Bikini
    Cardinal Fang
    Commented on this photo:

    If you’re gonna be small breasted, look like this.

  36. Whitney Port in a Bikini
    simsaid11
    Commented on this photo:

    Your new thumbnail control sucks! What you had before was way easier to use. Scrolling might look cool, but it sucks to actually use! Just a fact.

  37. taylorswiftass

    she is a useless whore stinking dirty, foul media tramp, fuck this useles bitch

  38. I guess none of you have ever had an elbow job before…mmmmm

  39. Marco

    The headline should read:
    A Cups. As far as the eye can see.

    Boo.

  40. Shenae Grimes in a Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    “Hi, this is the 1970′s. We’d like our swimwear back.”

  41. Shenae Grimes in a Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    What the hell kinda tan lines would that thing leave??

  42. Whitney Port in a Bikini
    Tommy Lee's Cock
    Commented on this photo:

    YES!

  43. Emily

    Mccord is fug – and a famewhore.

  44. McCord is fug. Yeeeeea. Lemme guess, you are a BBW right?

    McCords nipples could cut glass in that picture. Who is the woman in the old fashioned bikini? those black bottoms are HIDEOUS!!! Makes her ass look huge … or … maybe her ass IS huge … either way, that’s a shitty bikini.

  45. Shenae Grimes in a Bikini
    Ed
    Commented on this photo:

    Damn, I thought everyone said she was too skinny. Is she pregnant? Jeez!

  46. Shenae Grimes in a Bikini
    lulu
    Commented on this photo:

    is she pregnant?

  47. Katy Perry is Trash

    Never liked her or found her attractive but god damn this bitch needs a good meal or 20.

  48. Taryn Manning in a Bikini
    Jovy
    Commented on this photo:

    I can lose a good 5 pounds just trying to jog up those rolls of hers.

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