Kylie Jenner’s body is the result of butt enhancement cream and breast plumping lotion. Riiight.
Heidi Klum topless- and you’re already in the post.
Ben Affleck, you stupid devil you.
Charlotte McKinney on dating Charlotte McKinney.
Ted Nugent calls it on Cecil The Lion, but only by blind, stupid luck.
Hulk Hogan has some concerns about the afterlife, and surprise! They’re all racist.
Lena Dunham: Feminist leader or agent of the patriarchy?
How are Kourtney and Scott doing? Let’s pretend to find out.
Cara Delevingne had a bad interview. Have you heard? [Lainey Gossip]
The Houstons and Browns are already fighting again. [Dlisted]
Donald Trump hates breastfeeding now. [The Frisky]
And now the part where Rolling Stone gets sued to death. [Death and Taxes]
Your morning links.
It’s official: Donald Trump has no intentions of running for president. Not even one.
Bill Cosby claims he’s an expert at reading women except when he’s not even close. I’m talking way off.
Gwyneth Paltrow is the White Devil.
Ben Affleck is denying tabloid reports that he stuck his penis in the nanny. Batman prefers butlers.
Seth Rogen made a movie about drugs? I’ll watch it. [Lainey Gossip]
Just walk around naked, Phoebe Price. [Dlisted]
Ugly naked guy from Friends is real and wants coffee. [The Frisky]
The Fat Jew is a hokey joke thief. [Death and Taxes]
Amanda Bynes is on the loose which I probably should’ve warned you about days ago. How many are injured?
Hulk Hogan is homophobic, too. I’m as shocked as you are.
Donald Trump’s lawyer actually said marital rape isn’t a real thing out loud. And here we go.
Khloe Kardashian has no fucking clue what “unretouched” means.
Kate Upton’s not even really naked butt is storming the Internet.
Taylor Swift stole Left Shark. Shit is ON. [Lainey Gossip]
Joe Jackson almost got beat to Michael in heaven. [Dlisted]
Elisabeth Hasselbeck is a dumb, stupid, white cunt. [The Frisky]
Hulk Hogan: ‘Why can Obama say n*gger but I can’t?!’ [Death and Taxes]