Aubrey O’Day Managed To Out-Whore The Kardashians, Well Played

August 18th, 2011 // 110 Comments

Last night was the launch of Kim Kardashian‘s something or rather, except whoops! Someone made the mistake of inviting Aubrey O’Day and her equal, if not far more desperate penchant for whore-tittery, so let’s focus entirely on that. Mainly because I want to see if Kim uninvites her from her wedding now like the 50 guests she was forced to by the fire marshal.

KIM: So, listen, I’m really sorry, but you can’t come to my wedding now.
AUBREY: Why not?
KIM: Your fake tits are a fire hazard.
AUBREY: But your whole family has them…
KIM: Yes, but we all made appointments six months in advance to get fire retardant ones. Did you make an appointment six months in advance to get fire retardant ones?
KIM: And that’s why you can’t come. Also, I told TMZ you have herpes.
AUBREY: Did they write about it?!
KIM: Guy said maybe tomorrow.
AUBREY: *jumps up and down* SQUEEEEE!!

Photo: Splash News, WENN


  1. mel

    good god! nice vein bags!

    • I bet those tits have seen more cock action than Tom Cruise’s asshole.

    • Yea, I like to bottle them up, add some sugar and yeast, let the fermentation process take and then split the results with my gramps on his porch swing on a hot August day.

    • Just a California Guy

      She looks like a great fuck.
      I understand that some of you boys could not handle a women like this, but for those of us that understand how to handle a slut like this, life is VERY GOOD.
      God I do love whores!

      • Weirdo

        She’s so fucking ugly with her hair done and makeup on I can only imagine how hideous she is without. I wouldn’t let this tranny looking bitch anywhere near my crank!

  2. God is Black

    Jesus, what an attention seeking whore? Why not go topless anyway as I can see the blue veins running throughout her boobs like that fucken cheese plus the nipples are just dying to flop out if I drop a dollar bill and she picks it up!

  3. Did she have the same doctor that did her boobs put her head on off center?

  4. Aubrey O'Day Cleavage Kardashian Kollection
    Commented on this photo:

    I wanna hunk-a hunk-a hunk-a hunk-a flaaamin’ cow!

  5. Aubrey O'Day Cleavage Kardashian Kollection
    Commented on this photo:

    watch out, she’s about to spit it back out on her hand. That’s so gross.

  6. Board Certified Prevert

    Her breast veins are about to exploded that is not a good thing

  7. If smurfs were orange, she’d be Tittyfuck Smurf.

  8. that’s a face that needs a monocle.

  9. Queequeg

    In related news, Live Cattle and Pork Belly futures are up in today’s trading.

  10. Aubrey O'Day Cleavage Kardashian Kollection
    Commented on this photo:

    her breasts almost made me not notice her wonk-eye…almost

  11. Cock Dr

    Oh that is HORRIBLE.
    Stop trying to go braless. It just isn’t working. Breasts are generally much more admired when they’re perky. Those sacks are….well, they’re sacked.

    • rican

      speak for yourself, those sacks are fabulous. I’d do that skank any day.

      • Cock Dr

        Well, good luck with that.
        But really, look at Ms Electra a few posts back. Behold the wonders of a good sturdy bra. Breasts look better hoisted UP, not squashed down & out.

    • do you smoke crack?

      Carmen Electra’s boobs have nothing to do with a bra. take her bra off and those puppies stay in the same place….motionless. Aubrey O’Day could have the same but opted to go about 200cc less per boob.

      I think they both have fantastic (man made) racks and each will have their own pros and cons.

      • rican

        Don’t get me wrong, I agree with nunyo, both are spectacular. I’m an equal opportunity breast lover.

      • Cock Dr

        Obviously we need to get both women naked, side by side, for a detailed upper works analysis.
        I’ll get my laser pointer…cuz I don’t want to touch Audrey. You don’t know what she caught at that Kardashian party.

    • I see what you did there Cock…but I have 2 words for you

      Dennis Rodman

  12. Aubrey O'Day Cleavage Kardashian Kollection
    Commented on this photo:

    Say hello to the devil incarnate.

  13. Aubrey O'Day Cleavage Kardashian Kollection
    Commented on this photo:

    Totally natural! But then I like Mcnuggets too…

  14. 723-Josh O'Dell

    Not been former fan since she’s just a fucking whore a like

  15. Cyberdyne succeeds in camouflaging their circuitry as breast veins.

  16. this chick looks retarded. i’m guessing she is. she have a paris wonk eye going too? too bad the ‘i love kim’ post won’t be here in ten mins, i do love re-reading that. awesome job, whoever that is

  17. Frank Burns

    Who the heck is Aubrey O’Day? Oh wait, boobs! Nevermind.

  18. Common Sense

    Smooshed boobage is totally in right now, you guys.

  19. rican

    Fish, pls eliminate this moron like u do with the retail store posts. Not the first time this idiotic post comes up.

  20. it had to be said

    Unless and until I see Aubrey O’Day get pissed on, Kim wins.

  21. crazypants

    I love slutty, I do. But O’Day went straight past slutty and to crazy homeless woman who doesn’t realize/care her titties are outside her clothes.

    Coco dresses like in a professionally slutty manner, god bless her. O’Day is just a sad mess.

  22. princess party pants

    elegance has a name. aubrey o’day.

  23. Are you writing a fucking book on Kim. I didn’t know she fuck half of the guys you said she did. I’m no Kim K fan but this is fucking ridiculous.

  24. Jack Ketch

    Just another ugly, skanky, over-surgeried twat, about as sexy as cold margarine and a pathetic IQ.

  25. My Left Nut

    Goin’ old school. Those are some Good n’ Plenty’s!!!

  26. Aubrey O'Day Cleavage Kardashian Kollection
    Guy Smiley
    Commented on this photo:

    her breasts almost made me forget the pics of her disgusting belly / mid section that were posted on here a couple weeks ago

  27. Donald Trump

    They creepy veiny boobs distract me from the hideous choice of outfit. Blech.

    Christ, her tittays have more veins that my peen!

  28. Aubrey O'Day Cleavage Kardashian Kollection
    little turtle head
    Commented on this photo:


  29. Deacon Jones

    Ok. I’ve been with some major skanks in my day. I’ll admit it. So much so that my friends tell me I have an uncanny ability to pick one out of a crowd, even if she isn’t dressed like one. They call it my Skank-O-Meter.

    It’s beyond pinging right now. This is the kind of girl that immediately after taking off her clothes and assuming the position, grabs your junk and thrusts it right into her balloon knot, looking you in the eyes the whole time.

    • I’ve met a couple girls like that before…..ahh the memories. :)

      • KellyKelKel

        Ya’ll know damn well this didn’t happen to either of you. I swear to fuck, some men will create any fantasy to get themselves through the day.

      • General Disarray

        Yeah, because a woman would NEVER be a total tramp in real life. When is the last time you went out to a club? One quarter of the chicks in any club will drop trow for almost any decent looking guy after about 3-4 drinks. Women are so easy now it’s almost boring.

  30. little turtle head

    Great cans!!! Would love to lick them and taste her snatch!!!

  31. Aubrey O'Day Cleavage Kardashian Kollection
    NYC I Banker
    Commented on this photo:

    her breasts CAN NOT get me past the creepy face

  32. Not Long

    Dang! That’s cleavage? I thought she was wearing a roadmap of the LA freeway on her chest….

  33. Aubrey O'Day Cleavage Kardashian Kollection
    Commented on this photo:

    How skank are you? There’s an app for that!

  34. Aubrey O'Day Cleavage Kardashian Kollection
    Commented on this photo:

    Seriously, wtf is up with her face? It’s like it was carved by someone who didn’t really know what a smiling woman was supposed to look like…like that Star Trek episode.

  35. Reece

    That’s the dress pulling them down. It’s too small for her chunk.
    It’s either whore it up one way by flashing your ass or whore it up the other by flashing your tits. She chose the latter.

    Btw w/out looking at the pics who the hell wasted 34 shots on this chick?

  36. Aubrey O'Day Cleavage Kardashian Kollection
    Commented on this photo:

    WTF is wrong with her ear…looks like a clubs tattoo that’s been laser’d off

  37. Noe

    make it stop.

  38. WTF

    WTF is wrong with her ear…looks like she had a ‘clubs’ tatt removed. GPS roadmap’d funbags aren’t that great either…lightning mcqueen could drive down between those radiator springs.

  39. Aubrey O'Day Cleavage Kardashian Kollection
    Commented on this photo:

    You know that you’ve had a bad boob job when the top one tit almost touches your shoulder and the other looks like a small veiny bean bag.

  40. Aubrey O'Day Cleavage Kardashian Kollection
    Commented on this photo:

    If her right boob gets any higher up she’ll be a hunchback.

  41. What did her chest look like before the surgery to make that an improvement? I hope she still has the receipt because it’s time to demand a refund.


    Love me some veiny tits.

  43. Do Freebird

    God Fish, I haven’t seen anything this nasty since the last Aubrey O’Day picture you posted.

  44. KellyKelKel

    You know, I always wondered why certain women continue to dress like this even when 99% find them disgusting…now I know why. They do it for the 1% of morons who posted here saying this chick actually looks doable. I know sex is great and all but seriously, this chick is a walking leaky Valtrex ad with the worst looking tits and still there are guys who say “Der..I’d hit that!”. Fucking pathetic.

    Thanks for validating this kind of bullshit idiots.

  45. boo

    these are such awful pictures of her…geez, most of the candid pics of this gal are awful. odd thing is, i saw her in person not too long ago and she’s actually really freakin’ pretty without all that extra crap she puts on. what a shame.

  46. right

    you 15yr old pole smokers can go back to the video games. This chick is hot.

  47. Boom, got it! This is the alien chick from Mars Attacks!, right?

  48. Aubrey O'Day Cleavage Kardashian Kollection
    Crazy McMustache
    Commented on this photo:

    Not hot. Sorry. She’s just a big sloppy mess. I would enjoy sharing my flatulence with her, though.

  49. dude_on

    Filter that thru 5 tequilas and some low level lighting – goddess of the impaired.

  50. Brooke

    She’s orange. Sunny D orange. I don’t know who she is, but unless you are The Thing, I should think that alone would serve as dick repellant.

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