Following her break-up with Joe Jonas, Twilight star Ashley Greene has been literally clubbing every night since, and now it looks she’s banging any dude who doesn’t have a purity ring on. Like this guy. I mean, just look at his face. Lucky bastard has no clue what just happened. “Bro, I don’t even know. Walked into the bar, ordered a PBR – Totes badass, I know. – and the next thing I know this chick is all over me saying something like, ‘Put your hard cock in me, Satan,’ and then a bunch of talk about gay brothers watching me ‘gay her in the butt’ because ‘that’s all you ever do.’ It was INSANE. Also, what the fuck is a Twilight? Should I know what that is? Because she seemed quite adamant that I should when she took her pants off and laughed at her own vagina. Which ended in fucking, by the way, and not her throwing up and blacking out on the bed which I took for consent. Haha! Who does that? Certainly not me, haha, who wants to shop for vinyl? Let’s shop for vinyl.” *shifty eyes*
Photos: INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News
That’s the look on my face EVERY time a girl says “Yes, I’ll have sex with you!”
For Ashley Greene that would be the look … for some others there is another look I give…
Sign me up. Next!
I’ll go second.
What the fuck *is* a twilight?
So is this how you dudes get laid on the West Coast?
Slap on a pair of vans, and the ole’ hooded sweatshirt with vinyl jacket and you’re pulling Ashley Green tail?
I’m tempted to come out there and show you how it’s done. And then I’m trashing GW’s apartment.
The hardest part is listening to them talk. It ain’t easy, brother. A few hours of conversation with any woman in LA is enough to make a man stab his own penis.
I really don’t find her attractive
Ashley greene has one of the flattest asses I’ve ever seen.
who cares who she fucks. There are plenty of girls better looking in hollywood
well I think she has a nice ass.
Def diggin the darker hair on her~ and those thighs mmmmh!!
Don’t judge Ashley too harshly, after all she did just spend two years playing Joe Jonas’ “beard”. That had to take a great deal of dedication to her craft to pull off that role for so long. Remember the last girl in that role, prior to her, lost it in public, then ended up in rehab for personal issues.
If all she does is get publicly “falling down” drunk and bang random dudes, she is ahead of the game. If Taylor Swift had been honest she would have done the same thing, instead of writing a cheesy-assed song about him.
This many guys want to fuck a chick with a Michael Jackson nose?
oh yeah. and if she demanded it, they would fuck her nose as well.
Also, we would give her a good anal plowing.
Hi,- my name is Random – James Random.
She has the tiniest little nose…. so cute :-)
If I was in the market for a nose, I would probably choose the Ashley Greene model.
Haha i think he’s cute.
More rambling text evidence that the blogger may be insane.
i love it!
Hot sexy mess, sign me up/
Step back….I REALLY love her. Not like you, you cad.
Well my comment had an erection at the end of it~ meaning id be more into her, so there
Id say that landed the best pussy he ever had, but she looks like a lay there and fake it kind of girl.
When he had the hoodie down he looked like a tool, but now that he has it over his head he totally looks like Ben Affleck. Which I guess is kind of the same thing.
ARE YOU ALL EFFING MORONS THIS STORY IS OBVIOUSLY COMPLETE BULLSH*T GOD YOUD BE LUCKY HALF OF YOU IF A REMOTLEY DECENT GIRL EVEN WENT NEAR YOU.
Sasha , the only thing bullshit here is you and your need to shout!
Take a chill pill and call us when you realize that you have no idea what the hell is going on with Ashley Greene, just like everyone else here. The difference is we don;t really care, we are just being sarcastic, which is what the website is all about…..Sarcasm and humor!
YOUD BE LUCKY IF YOU WERE A REMOTLEY DECENT GIRL
she’s too much in extremities.At first she finds a guy with a purity ring and glows from goodness,now she is drunk and I hope she knows this guy.Hm…if she was a vampire she may drink this guy.Ooops,too odd.
Note to nonminti: Joe Jonas quickly ditched his ring after starting to date Ashley Greene. She didn’t put one on and pretend to be all pure and shit. However, she was ultimately unable to convert him to pussy from his butt-buddy preferences.
next thing she’ll do is bang a Marvel comics artist.
That’s Retarded
Beautiful
I am willing to be her drunken random…ANYTIME, ANYWHERE, ANYWAY!
me too
I think that’s her brother.. They look a lot alike.
Team Edward? Team Jacob? Team Has-a-Penis.
“Oh man, I am so glad I didn’t rub that one out before I went to singles night at Starbucks”.
I’ll just put this iPad in my pants, take a pic, and it to that Jonas guy so he knows what he’s missing.
That random’s name is apparently Dickey Doo. No idea what that means, but i’m guessing she hired a gay porn star that has a continual hankering for scooby snacks.
Normally I think she’s gorgeous, but when she gets too pale and her hair gets too dark, the resemblance to Michael Jackson is uncanny.
So the gay english guy and the First Nation dude on steroids didn’t work out? A two strike whore is easy pickens.
I think she’s actually banging the chick.
all hot hot model type chicks have sex all the time within 2 months during their entire womanhood, until at least 40 – real life true story…
the option: WORKING IN A BROTHEL will continue to be on her mind.
Her next fling will be with annie dick-L-do
any dick will do
This makes me want to search the internet for her nudes.
rally she’s nuttin spesh
From the skeevy jacket to the idiotic look on his face, a winner. Hear that Charlies?
Why did you have to make a date rape joke? I don’t think I’m going to read your site anymore.
Kirsten, attitudes like yours are the reason that real rapes don’t get convicted. Ashley was of age and willing. She knew damn well that if she wanted to get drunk and spread her legs that a million men would be very happy to accommodate her. I say congratulations to the lucky guy that was at the right place at the right time.
Tom Hanks?