October 27, 2005
Kelly Osbourne wants to be Kylie Minogue
Kelly Osbourne is apparently looking to revive her singing career by aiming to be the next Kylie Minogue. Although the most logical way to do this would be to eat Kylie and then become her, Kelly has gone against her instincts and prompted to simply copy Kylie's electro pop sound and sexual innuendos.
She says, "I have learned lots about performance by watching old videos of Kylie." And she intends to rival Minogue's status as the most perfect bottom in pop, with raunchy sex-themed videos. She adds, "Sex really does sell, so I'll be doing loads of that."
No you won't. Because what Kylie sells is pure, delicious sex, and you'd pretty much be selling amorphous thrashing. Why don't you try to emulate someone more your league? Like Jann Arden or the Michelin Man? Then you could sell tires! You'd be good at that, hoss.
Kelly Osbourne 'I Could Be The Next Kylie' [Female First]
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Comments
1. Posted by Zanathon on November 17, 2005 11:54 PM
Kelly wants to be like Kylie???
Why the hell does Ms. Osborne want breast cancer? Coo-Coo!
2. Posted by JoFrances on March 22, 2006 06:56 PM
who on earth wants to be Kylie?? learning about performance by watching I should be so lucky??? LOL how sad. and all kylie has to offer is sex. no wonder most of the people in her audience are rabid red blooded males and no one else. kylie's talent is the ability to dress up her arse and shove it in as many cameras as possible.