Amy Winehouse Wasn’t Adopting a Child, You Don’t Say?

Over the weekend, it was rumored that Amy Winehouse was in the final stages of adopting a 10-year-old girl from St. Lucia (above) which people actually took seriously even though, at the most smallest, practically non-existent levels, there’s no way any form of government would’ve signed off on this. In fact, because I’m an optimist, I like to believe there’d first be talk of just shooting the kid and saving everyone the rush of finding her facedown in a bathtub full of heroin. But, happy ending, Amy’s rep is denying the entire story which is more than likely a shakedown of her estate. TMZ reports:

The Sunday Mirror reported Dannika Augustine and her grandmother both confirmed that Amy was about to begin the adoption process … and both of Dannika’s parents had signed off on the plan.
But Amy’s rep tells TMZ … “It’s not true” … adding, “I think [Amy] might have met her in St. Lucia, but she was in no way about to adopt her.”

For the record, Amy spent most of the past few years in St. Lucia boosting their drug economy and peeing standing up, so I completely believe she told this little girl she was going to adopt her. However, I also believe she told her other things like that time she ate a cat, why Pete Doherty is a figment of her imagination so powerful other people can see him and how she’s going to live forever like Keith Richards. So, of those four things, at least two had to be a lie. It’s your basic junkie math.

Photo: Splash News