Amanda Bynes’ Tokemobile of Death Has Finally Been Impounded

You’d think after narrowly escaping arrest, being photographed smoking her face off behind the wheel and having a judge tell her to stay the fuck off the road which she ignored and plowed into another car anyway, Amanda Bynes might finally learn her lesson and quit driving on a suspended license. Except you’d forget to factor in she talks to inanimate objects now and her toaster oven is holding her best friend Blueberry Pop Tart hostage, so really Amanda had no choice but to go out yesterday morning and get her car impounded. “Never leave a friend in need behind,” Grandfather Dishwasher always says. TMZ reports:

Law enforcement sources tell TMZ … Bynes was pulled over in her black BMW around 9:00 AM in Burbank, CA. We’re told when cops ran her license they discovered it was suspended.
According to our sources, cops impounded the vehicle and issued her a misdemeanor ticket for driving on a suspended license.

What will be real fun is when police go through Amanda’s car and discover it’s a goddamn bong on wheels, except she swears it’s not weed she’s smoking in her cigarette lighter pipe. Back her up, Brother Glovebox- no, wait, never mind. He only speaks German.

She is also telling friends … the picture TMZ posted of her smoking from a drug pipe inside her car (below) is not what it seems. She says she was smoking tobacco … despite the fact that her cup-holders had remnants of what appeared to be marijuana.

As obvious as it is that Amanda Bynes is in a downward spiral of denial and dependency, I actually believe her when she says it’s just tobacco in her custom pipe. Mostly because it makes all kinds of sense that Amanda Bynes would pick the most tedious way to smoke while behind the wheel. She probably cures the tobacco herself while on the freeway. “Alright, Beamer, Papa Smurf and I are getting in the trunk to bring in the harvest. You drive straight now, ya hear?”