Alright, Who Was Supposed To Keep An Eye on Jodie Foster?

January 26th, 2011 // 52 Comments

I’ve gone on the record numerous times to voice my support for the homosexual community and essentially say that most, if not all, discrimination against them is based on the picking and choosing of text from a 2,000 year old heavily-edited book. That said, drugging our hottest actresses and attempting to sink your lesbian claws in them is where I draw the line, which is clearly what Jodie Foster is doing in these photos. You want to marry another woman and have the same rights as straight couples? Go nuts. You want to roofie Olivia Wilde on the off-chance she’ll like it and make a permanent lifestyle change involving dog adoption? I’ll deport you my-goddamn-self. I’m serious, one phone call and Queer Island (Not to be confused with my basement.) gets a new resident. Don’t think I won’t do it.

Photos: Getty, WireImage


  1. clyde

    Holy shit that chick has a man jaw.

  2. Kelsey

    You are way too funny!

  3. Olivia Wilde Jodie Foster
    Commented on this photo:

    Looking at the face in this picture who in all honesty can say she is hot?

    • Arzach

      She is hot.
      And you probably do not like women.

      • clyde

        I actually do like women…that is why I want them to look like women. Maybe you are the one who’s sexually confused.

    • Sir Mix Alot

      Although she has a masculine jawline it doesn’t take away from the face that she has pretty eyes, good cheek bones and nice lips. So yes she is hot but just not classically beautiful.
      plus a sexy body even with the smaller breasts.

  4. @andressilva

    As if it would make any difference for me.

    Actually, this just gave me a quite hot mental image of Jodie and Olivia locking lips (all six of them), so I’ll happily settle for it.

    Of course that that, in my head, Jodie’s still in 1991.

  5. Olivia Wilde Jodie Foster
    Commented on this photo:

    Two things:
    (1) Jodie Foster has ginormous calf muscles, very lesbo of her
    (2) she is quickly morphing into Hillary Clinton

  6. DKNY

    It puts the Olivia on it’s skin.

  7. Not if I rough you first

    Absolutely! Just because you’re America’s favorite man-hunter, it doesn’t mean you can have OW. That deal is off the table. What’s more, I’m going to make an ignorant guess and say, you don’t have a mountain goat to strangle…

  8. Fondue

    Holy crap Olivia either has an enormous head or Jodie a tiny one …

  9. g

    Urm…. are those stretchmarks on Olivia’s tits?

  10. I wonder if Jodie Foster wanted to make an impression on Obama?

  11. RoboZombie

    I like Jodie Foster, but she needs to hide that raging boner!

  12. i do love lesbians. almost as much as i hate all religion.

    espec christians, you need to read waaay more. specifically about how there were something like 16 “saviors” before jesus was “born”–who were all born on 25 dec, to a virgin, who died and rose after 3 days. the greatest story ever told as been re-written every 2500 years or so during the ages of virgo..

    forgive me if i’m not perfect in my detail but the overall gist is 100 right.

    • you’re forgiven.

      offhand you have the Mithas saga which almost became the official religion of the Roman Empire, then you have the Egyptian Osiris. Inanna/Ishtar is a form of a female version. then you have the Aphrodite and possibly the Artemis.Again female versions. And again you have the female versions of Demeter and Penolope/Kore.
      list goes on. I would say more along the lines of the ages of Ares and Taurus.

    • sage

      You will burn in Hell for all eternity

  13. Crabby Old Guy

    The only “religion” I need is Olivia Wilde screaming, “Oh God!” as I drilled her so hard she forgets her own name.

    Now, go in peace.

    • me too. But i would do the same with Jodie Foster. And i don’t believe for one second she is just a lesbian. you don’t do that many love scenes with guys and keep the father of her babies a secret. Jodie Foster is a closet bi.

  14. Yep


  15. nano

    i’d do a sex on olivia if you know what i mean.

  16. Richard McBeef

    Olivia Wilde is hotness. Now that’s somebody I would shoot a president for.

  17. Bucky Barnes

    Body language suggests their respective candy stores are closed for the day.

  18. karen

    Why not? I mean, since she’s going to hell anyway.

  19. Marley

    Olivia Wilde is one of our hottest actresses? Good Lord, that’s depressing.

  20. St. Jezebel

    Hey Olivia, why so serious?

  21. Mel Gibson's Shrink

    First of all, let’s not jump to conclusions. Secondly, well, she did play a bisexual on House, so maybe she is one in real life. What’s disturbing is the age difference. Jodie Foster is goddamn ancient. She must have over 20 years on Wilde. That’s just like sleeping with your mother. Blech.

  22. Parker

    I often wonder how lesbians buttfuck each other and no matter how they do it does it really count as buttfucking if there’s no penis involved?

  23. Olivia Wilde Jodie Foster
    Zombie Kitty
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh Christ! She looks like Nicole Kidman’s grandmother!!!

  24. Olivia Wilde Jodie Foster
    Commented on this photo:

    Could there be 2 more irrelevant people…….
    Foster is: (a) not aging well
    (b) not looking very attractive
    (c) looking for work
    (d) yet still respected outside of Hollyweird for the simple fact that she is smart enough to know when to keep her mouth shut. She has no comments in regards to sex and no comment in regards to politics. Good girl, just stay in the closet!

    Wilde is: a fucking opinionated moron who doesn’t know how to keep her oversized and irregular pie-hole shut about anything. If she ever has ANY hope of having the “appearance” of intelligence, she needs to learn to SHUT THE FUCK UP!

  25. FY

    Um, Jodie looks better than Olivia.

  26. I am going to believe these two were grinding cunt juice on each others faces about 20 minutes after the photos were snapped….

  27. Olivia Wilde Jodie Foster
    Commented on this photo:

    I just never would have guessed that Olivia is so much taller than Jodie.

  28. Olivia Wilde Jodie Foster
    Jack R
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like Olivia is about to make the “ultimate” sacrifice to take her career to the next level

  29. ProstituteForMoney

    O noe! The old crow stole 13!

  30. Olivia Wilde Jodie Foster
    Commented on this photo:

    god, she’s so tall!

  31. Olivia Wilde Jodie Foster
    Commented on this photo:

    Obviously some people have to respect for a lady. Just because she is dressed conservatively that does not mean she doesn’t look fantastic. It’s called class people. Look it up. As far as her not aging gracefully I have no idea what that comment is referring to. She is a stunningly natural beauty that I must respect for obtiously not butchering herself with grotesquely Hollywood standard plastic surgery. This is a woman I can look up to not only for her obvious self respect but her intelligence, grace, and immense talent. This country watch too much MTV and Bravo. Jodi Foster is a legend in her own time.

    That other broad is hardly worth commenting on. I don’t even know who she is.

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