Alexander Skarsgard & Prince Harry Are Racing Each Other To The South Pole For Charity

September 11th, 2013 // 10 Comments
That's A Penis
Alexander Skarsgard Full Frontal Nude
Skarsgard Goes Full Frontal Read More »

Because there’s been a lot of nips, maybe vaginas and giant, store-bought breasts lately, I thought I’d take a minute to give the ladies some eye.. some eye.. hold on a second. – *reaches down, palms out baby, hands it to Photo Boy, whispers “No, no, the one behind Quiznos,” goes back to writing* – Where was I? Alexander Skarsgard and Prince Harry are having a foot race to the South Pole for charity, right. People reports:

The event, for which Harry, 28, is a patron, includes three teams of wounded service members from the U.K., the U.S. and Australia/Canada, competing to raise money for their national charities to help fund rehabilitation services for military veterans.
It’s a physical challenge, even for the fit, as team members compete to pull pulks, which are custom-built arctic sledges, as they push to reach the pole’s southernmost point.
Their tenacity and determination to finish – in temperatures as low as 49 degrees below zero and 50 mph winds – offers symbolic hope to soldiers who have suffered physical and cognitive disabilities related to their military service.
“I’m honored to be working and training alongside these soldiers to raise money and awareness for this very worthy cause,” said Skarsgard, 37, who will compete with the prince on the U.S. team.

Considering Alexander Skarsgard grew up surviving Swedish winters and Prince Harry lived in a castle with a butler, I don’t really see how this is fair, but the more pressing concern is how the Earth will survive exposing the South Pole to a Thundering Lord of Fuck and a fire-crotch. I thought we were trying to save the ice caps not melt them into a steaming, frothing liquid that floods South America. Or is that just another liberal myth like history, science and math? I knew that shit wasn’t real. *lights calculator on fire* LIES!

I have no idea why this is here, but let’s be honest, that applies to anything anywhere on this site.

Photos: Getty


  1. Cock Dr

    I watched that video…..I need a translator and probably a pregnancy test now too.

  2. Smapdi

    I couldn’t be bothered to read the summary – is “racing to the south pole” a metaphor for something or is there actually a race?

  3. JungleRed

    He has a real pretty mouth.

  4. “… and Australia/Canada…”

    Seriously, People? You lazy pricks. Why didn’t you just say “…and the rest” like the Gilligan’s Island theme and save yourself all that trouble?

  5. Prince Harry The Sentebale Stories of Hope Exhibition Showcase
    Commented on this photo:

    And I just watched the season finale of True Blood and it’s like “this”.

  6. Actually, i’m not sure you want that translated…
    it’s more potty mouth than pretty mouth.

  7. Skarsgård. Prince Hot Ginge, that other dude whose name I can never remember, a 335 km trek across a frozen tundra, -40°C temps, 50 mph constant winds, harsh terrain, drinking melted snow for water, sensory deprivation, and walking for up to 18 hours per day. What could possibly go wrong here that won’t end up in frozen batshit drunken nudity? I ask you. I just hope I’m around to watch the footage. *gets popcorn* Hot damn, I’m proud of these guys! That’s some hardcore shit, right there.

    So if Skarsgård and team US win this thing, does that mean he gets to declare the South Pole “The New Conquered Realm of the Towering, Thundering Viking Lord of Fuck?” I kinda need to know these things.

  8. Alexander Skarsgard True Blood Season Six Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Did anyone else glance at the headline and randomly think, “….yeah, but Skarsgard is gonna do it with his penis….”?

  9. Rasputin's Evil Twin

    Let’s see man-hauling sledges to to Pole worked so well for Captain Scott 102 years ago. Death by starvation, scurvy, exposure and stupidity for the lot. Glad to see the British have learned from their experience.

    Good thing popcorn goes well with gallons of vodka – this should be fun to watch.

Leave A Comment