Alessandra Ambrosio in a bikini

July 17th, 2009 // 102 Comments

These are shots of Victoria’s Secret model Alessandra Ambrosio spending Thurdsay at a beach in Malibu with her 11-month-old daughter Anja Louise. Normally, I’d say Alessandra is dead to me since giving birth, but I’m trying to turn over a new, more sensitive leaf. So let’s just say she’s only partially maimed which means we can still make out. On that note, don’t be afraid to feel empowered by my example. It’s what I’m here for.

Photos: Splash News
superficial

  1. Lawn Gnome Council

    -SCIENCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  2. Huge Member

    I have seen and felt a real vagina before…BEFORE and AFTER it had a football helmet shoved through it.

    Why so defensive? You can still shave it, dress it up, perfume it, take pictures of it and brag about how terrific it was “in it’s day”. Nothing wrong with that.

    Sacrifice is part of life. You sacrificed the the part that keeps a man interested in you. Enjoy your kid…and your flapping sailboat sailed vagina.

  3. Lawn Gnome Council

    @52 no you haven’t, OR you have, and the peson who owned said vagina dumped your inadequate ass, and now you’re clinging to the one thing that makes you feel superior. Once you learn how to please a woman and see her as an equal you may actually be happier.

  4. Lawn Gnome Council

    oh yeah and do you know why the plates of a new born’s skull aren’t fused? its so birth is easier and the babie’s head is squishier. The vagina is a pretty amazing piece of evolutionary design. I don’t know why guys like you are the way you are, and its not my job to change your mind since I’ll never meet you. But in a world were women are still stoned to death for being raped, don’t you think it would be better to not be a dick to women just for being women?

  5. Amy

    I agree #54…why are all you men so cruel? I’m sure you only act like this because it’s anonymous…but I hope whoever you have your eye on finds out how you really feel.

  6. mafme

    Ack! What’s going on with her leg? Her knee is pointed way in and her foot is angling outward. Weird.

  7. wow! everyone should have their own show here, this is funny…

  8. Huge Member

    So let me get this straight…

    Comments about a tiny dick or inadequate sexual technique directed at a man are acceptable, but when a man states that he prefers a tight, unstretched vagina, HE’S the jerk.

    Um, okay. Yes dear. Your vagina is still the best. No complaints here. No, I wouldn’t change a thing. My tiny dick? Sorry…yes, you’re right…it is small..haha, no it doesn’t bother me that you said that…haha, I deserve it. You’re the queen and I am but a lowly, inadequate servant. You deserve much better sexual satisfaction than I can possibly give to you with my tiny dick. Haha, yes, I suck. Your vagina still rules. Yes dear.

    There we go. All better? Good.

    (And the Oscar goes to…Huge Member, for his convincing performance of a man who will say anything to avoid the wrath of angry women with reamed out vaginas everywhere)

  9. I get stabby

    @58 when a man is Misogynistic the usual assumption is that there is an underlying emotional reason. No one would be guessing that you have a tiny dick or are lousy in bed or have mommy issues if you hadn’t been sexist and woman hating FIRST. You came on here and tried to get a reaction and now you’re upset because people are making a reasonable guess as to what the motives for your ideas might be.

    Thats like a Nazi saying “how dare you assume I have racist tendencies?, I just love to goose step around and scream heil Hitler alot”

    HEAD DESK HEAD DESK…

  10. Huge Member

    Not upset. I just prefer a tight vagina, please.

  11. Crapcakes

    Great. Troll wins..you brought Nazi’s into it

  12. I get stabby

    God you really are just a whole weather system of dumb, aren’t you?

  13. Huge Member

    Victory is mine!

    More air-tight vaginas for me and my men!

  14. Ms Whiplash

    Please, Huge, just tell me that you are not a father…I just feel too sad thinking that
    you are married/in a relationship with a woman who has given birth to your baby. I’d feel a lot better thinking you’re just a slightly immature big talker with no actual life experience. Thanks

  15. I get stabby

    More? How does that work? Its not like I was stopping you.

    A subtle victory is always the best.

  16. Rose

    It is a myth that women get ‘stretched out’ down there after childbirth – it actually goes right back to the way it was after a couple months, doctor’s word.

    And her body looks exactly the same as it did before she had a kid, still too skinny, but no cellulite or anything. If she was hot before, why is she no longer hot now… Such shallow, ignorant comments on this site. I guess it’s to be expected.

  17. His Huge Greatness Himself

    Where ma shawty?

  18. Huge Member

    I’ve noticed that all of the push-back to my comments have come from women. That is to be expected. But any man will tell you that a tight box is the best.

    Please…I just like a tight vagina. Some prefer tight buns or big cans. I prefer a vagina that can loosen a pickle jar. Just because you can’t provide this anymore is no reason to become so angry and dissuasive to those who still can.

    Have a heart why don’t ya.

  19. I get stabby

    Well I’m a young a woman, who had sex ed (which you need), who has never given birth (thanks partly to sex ed) and I think you are the douchiest troll since the resident racist who used to troll around the superficial, ranting about Michelle Obama. So you win that award at least. Now go have fun with your girlfriend/right hand/blow up goat/whatever. Goodnight : )

  20. Huge Member

    Ok…but do you have a tight vagina?

    If so, what are you doing later?

  21. Fat! What a freaking heiffer. After chicks have babies, they always get all fat and shit like this. Flipping tragic. But that said, I would still so eat her poop. Even though she is a fat ass fat bag of shit fat. Fat faat.

  22. Fat! What a freaking heiffer. After chicks have babies, they always get all fat and shit like this. Flipping tragic. But that said, I would still so eat her poop. Even though she is a fat ass fat bag of shit fat. Fat faat.

  23. Ms Whiplash

    Riiiiiiiiight, Huge, but who’s going to be the one to tell the likes of Jessica Alba, Adriana Lima, Gisele Bundchen, Kendra Wilkinson, Halle, Salma Hayek, my next door neighbor, me, and countless other MILFs that we’re no longer any good in bed? I think you’ve just been fucking the wrong pussies. Just because your Mom’s vagina isn’t tight anymore, don’t generalize about the rest. It only makes you sound like a little boy who doesn’t have a clue what to do with a woman in bed. Good Night and don’t let the door hit you in the ass on the way out.

  24. Huge Member

    I never said “no longer good in bed”. I simply said that their vaginas weren’t as tight anymore.

    I mean, really. It isn’t brain surgery. If you push a bag of potatoes through your snack, you can’t really expect a miracle vaginal “snap-back”.

    Or should I say, “snack-back”. Haha…see? It’s not so bad if you keep a sense of humor about it.

  25. @41

    yeah, you are absolutely right.most of men writing here are losers who would die to fxxx anything

  26. shazzle

    SHE IS HOT

  27. de

    the Victoria Secret models look like goddesses on the catwalk whereas in real life, they just look sickly thin

  28. dontlooknow

    Yuk! She looks like one of those posed dead bodies in the traveling museum expo “Body Works”.

  29. Ms Whiplash

    Sorry, Huge, you’re just plain wrong. Yes, it’s not brain surgery, but it is basic human anatomy. Those muscles can and should snap back. If you didn’t know if a woman had kids or not, I doubt you could tell the difference, just by her vagina. Whatever, let’s be friends. I’m beginning to feel like the only way I could prove it to you would be to have sex with you, but that’s just inappropriate! Have a nice day.

  30. jules

    #67, and where is my shawty?

  31. jules

    #67, and where is my shawty?

  32. me

    i have had a child and trust me ,,,i can please my man better than before because asfter you have a child you become a real woman (unlike the little 10 year olds u r use to ) no offense to 10 yr olds …just watch out for these pervs on here !!!!

  33. me

    i have had a child and trust me ,,,i can please my man better than before because asfter you have a child you become a real woman (unlike the little 10 year olds u r use to ) no offense to 10 yr olds …just watch out for these pervs on here !!!!

  34. Huge Member

    @83:

    If becoming a real woman means pushing out a cow and then toting around a big, stretched-out, sloppy vagina, then congratulations.

    I can tell the difference and I like a tight vagina…the kind that can pick up change off the sidewalk or strangle Boris Karloff in a horror film. You get the idea…

    Any takers?

  35. qwerty

    @ huge member

    you spend waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too much time here arguing about stupid topics. good day sir!

  36. Me

    I’m friend’s with her ‘baby daddy’s’ sister and he’s a cutie and also, not going anywhere….kkthxbai

  37. Me

    I’m friend’s with her ‘baby daddy’s’ sister and he’s a cutie and also, not going anywhere….kkthxbai

  38. ANAL SEX

    Hey Huge Member, just throw it in the pooper. That’s always tight unless the bitch is a Hungarian porn star.

  39. RtSS

    I’d hit that… She is definitely fine enough to bounce and drool on. That poopchute of hers is nice and tight. Having a baby, she looks very fine. Lost all that ‘baby weight’ that after birth mommas always complain about. What is up in the image #6 where her reflection is in the mirror of the car she is standing next to…? Some photoshop trickery? Interesting. I would even lend my tongue to her and allow her to use it in any way that se thought she would enjoy. My tongue is your slave for life Alessandra Ambrosio.

  40. Alan Smithee

    To “Huge Member” –

    I gotta chime in here for the men out there…

    The fact is, I have dated a few single moms before I got married and became a dad and you are dead wrong. Seriously. This whole, “loose, gaping hole after birth” schtick is just dead wrong. I have dated plenty of women… and to be honest, the biggest, sloppiest vagina ever encountered was that of childless women. It is all relative to the person and the shape, really. In fact, my first girlfriend was a virgin and after a few months was a bit roomy, but I think it has more to do with women of experience and knowing how to control the muscles down there. My wife had a child three years ago and it is still as amazing as it ever was.

    Actually, strangely the pregnancy changed the shape of her vagina a bit and now it is less shallow… which is never a bad thing. As far as the tightness… well, to be completely honest, it is perfect. And her body looks amazing and she is even more gorgeous.

    Sorry for the crudeness of some of this, ladies, but I couldn’t take another minute of his crap without chiming in for the decent guys out there… and furthermore, this chick is far too thin for most men’s standards.

  41. mmmmmm

    mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

  42. Huge Member

    I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that “Alan Smithee” probably has a vagina himself.

    But is it a TIGHT vagina??

  43. c-section is the only way

    I have never given birth. but when I do – I will DEFINITELY have a c-section. just because I hear waaaaaaay too many comments about loose vaginas, and I don’t want to think that I might have one too after giving birth naturally. but I do feel sorry for all the moms who did it naturally because of men like tiny member

  44. lizzie79

    @93

    Its sad women feel that way. C sections are major surgery with associated risks, and take much longer to recover from than natural delivery. Subsequent pregnancies are also higher risk after C section, look it up. I am due to give birth soon and hope to have a natural delivery. If I’m not as tight afterwards my husband can get the hell over it, why should I risk my life for something so stupid? Its not like guys remain perfect Ken dolls forever, their dicks cant get as hard as they once did once they get old, women live with it!

  45. Huge Member

    I require a vagina that can cut off the blood supply from my penis like a python snake choking it’s prey.

    Blat out a kid and can’t do this anymore? Then hit the bricks, sister!

  46. virgin

    tiny member I’d like to meet you (just because I’m incredibly curious to see what u look like. I hope you are as awesome as I imagine).
    are u from nyc area?
    if not – can we meet thru facebok?
    thanx

  47. Huge Member

    Not sure what to make of this…

    On one hand, you’ve insulted me by minimizing my penis.

    On the other hand, your screen name is “virgin”, and if that’s true, you undoubtably possess a tight vagina, which, as you know, is my kryptonite.

    Decisions, decisions…

  48. virgin

    until I find out for myself I will keep referring to you as “tiny member” . don’t get upset just prove me wrong.

  49. virgin

    that’s what I thought tiny member…… you know, nowdays, they can make your thnigy bigger, it’s called penis enlargement. may be you should look into it. take care :)

  50. Huge Member

    Please post a speculum report documenting the actual size and tightness of your vagina, and I will post photos of my HUGE member.

    It’s time to put your money where your vagina is.

    Sincerely,
    Huge Member

    “Everybody must believe in something…. I believe I’ll have a tight vagina.”
    -Albert Einstein

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