Your Feel Good Post Of The Day: Chris Brown’s Still In Jail & Donald Sterling Has Cancer

May 2nd, 2014 // 48 Comments

Posted by Photo Boy

It looks like Donald Sterling‘s lifetime ban from the NBA might end sooner than expected with the news that he’s battling prostate cancer. I’ll pause while everyone decides to react with “Well, that is terrible, I wouldn’t wish that on anyone,” instead of what really initially popped into all of our minds which was “Good.” Yes, lots of times shitty things happen to good people, cancer definitely being one of them, but this is not one of those times.

We don’t have to feel bad that something shitty happened to a shitty person. And if you think I’m just referring to his openly racist remarks, keep in mind this is the same man who refused repairs to a partially paralyzed tenant living in one of his squalid, poorly heated with no working toilet apartments only to reply “Is she one of those black people that stink?” when asked whether or not he’d authorize the repairs. (He didn’t.) So now that he knows what it feels like to be at the mercy of a malevolent force more powerful than himself, no, I don’t feel bad about saying fuck him.

Which brings me to Chris Brown. He’s been in jail for six weeks for basically acting like his probation (That he’s on for violently assaulting Rihanna) was a suggestion rather than a legal mandate, to the point where he bragged at a rehab facility about being “good at using guns and knives.” Again here, “Good.” Stay in jail and practice your knife skills with a shaved-down toothbrush, idiot.  We’ve got plenty of violent creeps and egomaniacs and being short one who can moonwalk is no great tragedy.

So thanks, Chris and Don, for bearing the justifiable misery that only sometimes befalls the rich and powerful. Couldn’t have happened to a more deserving couple of guys.

Photo: Getty

superficial

  1. yourmom

    I love everything about this post. It tickles.

    • Dirtbag Alert

      Memo in life: Most of the men who reach 80 have some “level”
      of Prostate Cancer, it’s part of living that long. It seldom is a killer.
      However, Sterling is the kind of Asshat that will use it to try and
      gain sympathy and make people feel bad for him. He will
      probably live to be 100. It’s the same sort of crap he pulls
      each time he slanders a particular race or religion, then gives
      his front row tickets to someone from that nationality/belief
      for a few weeks. Some ex-special forces merc needs to stop
      by his apartment and help that cancer along.

  2. Boo

    FYI, prostate cancer patients have quite long life expectancy.

  3. Chris Brown Probation Hearing
    Commented on this photo:

    The look on his face says “Maybe I shouldn’t have beaten the shit out of the hot chick I was banging.”

  4. When you said “Chris and Don” I thought you were talking about me.

    Anyway, my first reaction to hearing he has cancer is was “I wouldn’t wish that on anybody”. Hopefully he doesn’t suffer long.

    Fuck Chris Brown. Fuck Rihanna while you’re at it.

    • He is talking about you, Don – with the Fish out of town, Photo Boy is seizing the chance to send us both Coded Words.

      When he wrote ” ‘justifiable’ misery”, I instantly knew that was a deliberate shout out to build up his own private fan base. Or else it was a signal to send in an extraction team. One of those, I tend to get them confused.

  5. As much as I disagree with Donald Sterling’s statements, I have to admit that if I owned the Clippers, I wouldn’t want Chris Brown at the games.

  6. GRRM

    It’s horrible that cancer has to live out its remaining days as the Sterling spreads.

  7. Chris Brown Probation Hearing
    BB
    Commented on this photo:

    Hopefully he doesn’t try to escape or he’ll activate that explosive neck collar… (edit–that should have read ‘does,’ not ‘doesn’t')

  8. For being black/mexican, Sterling’s hooker sure looks like a Thai ladyboy. I’m sure Chris Brown will be fucking/beating her soon.

  9. Spleen

    The only thing better would be if they had to share a cell.

  10. MRF

    If only this post had tits, it would be everything I love about this site. You’ve made Fish proud, PB.

  11. I’ll never wish illness on anybody.But this billonaire fuckhead ain’t suffering . I have zero fucks to give for either one of these wastes of life.

  12. KillerBear8

    This is PhotoBoys best work in the lime light… well done!

  13. Maybe people who say “I’d never wish cancer on anyone” are better people than me, or maybe not. All I know is if anyone is expecting me to feel the slightest amount of sympathy for a racist billionaire shitstain of a human being, you’re going to be disappointed.

  14. Skippy3000

    Anyone who wishes cancer on another person is sick.

    • As someone who finished a second round of chemotherapy just two weeks ago, I have to agree with you. On the other hand, is it wrong to wish he feels as shitty as chemo makes one feel, even if he doesn’t have the actual disease?

  15. Robb7

    It’s scary when things turn out exactly as they should — a POS having cancer and talentless troll having to do time. God is good, and PB has done an excellent job.

  16. Let’s not forget that when an Assistant Coach of the Clippers found out he had prostate cancer and needed an expensive surgery, Sterling wouldn’t have the team pay for it. He said, “If we pay for his surgery, we will have to pay for everybody’s surgery.” Four Clippers players chipped in the $70K to pay for the surgery and saved the Assistant Coach’s life.

    Sterling and his wife are miserable human beings who will never get all they deserve in retribution.

    PS – Yes, his wife. She posed as a government employee to assess the ethnicity of their renters so they wouldn’t “waste” repairs on anybody with darker skin than theirs. She can go to whatever hell right along with her husband the scumbag.

  17. If Sterling had to go on Kickstarter to raise the dough for an operation, he’d be shopping for a $7.58 prostatectomy right about now. That notion is even more enjoyable when you realize that would basically consist of a corkscrew being shoved up his ass, then yanked out really hard. But hey, for that amount of money I’m sure we can ensure that no black people are in the waiting room at the time.

  18. Chris Brown Probation Hearing
    Commented on this photo:

    I remember Paul Walker (RIP) spoke about Chris Brown in one interview, that he was a good kid, that he was confused, but he was good. I think Paul was wrong about that.

  19. shutupandsing

    Weird. I personally don’t wish bad will on anyone just because
    they think differently then what I believe.

    guess leftists scum are different like that

    • ugh

      “keep in mind this is the same man who refused repairs to a partially paralyzed tenant living in one of his squalid, poorly heated with no working toilet apartments only to reply “Is she one of those black people that stink?” when asked whether or not he’d authorize the repairs. (He didn’t.) ”

      I imagine he thinks a lot like you do.

    • Photo Boy also doesn’t believe selfies will catch on, and in other news, conservatives are great at not taking themselves so seriously they just spew politics whenever someone gets pissed at a rich white racist.

  20. XVO

    Because racists deserve to die, but it’s a travesty when a murderer suffers some pain while being executed for a double murder.

  21. Fish, you always know the way to warm my cold-ass heart & wet my pussy with a caption :)

  22. Did you write this, Photo Boy? It is as eloquent as Fish. Hear,hear!

  23. right

    Hate Sterling if you must. But there are these few little issues known as surreptitious recording and the First Amendment. Sterling is going to wipe the floor with the NBA.

    With regards to Chris Brown, i hope he gets the full 4 years.

    • right? No, wrong. FOR THE LAST FUCKING TIME, THERE ARE NO FIRST AMENDMENT ISSUES INVOLVED HERE!!

      I really wish everyone who runs around claiming something violates that particular portion of the Constitution would actually bother to read the damn thing. Heads up, skippy: unless the gub’mint is running after Sterling with a gag order, imprisoning, unduly taxing or even flat-out killing him for his utterances and opinions, his First Amendment rights have not been violated. GET IT?

      Now, if you want to talk about his reasonable expectations of privacy in his girlfriend’s home, and CA being an all-party consent state when it comes to any civilian recordings of other civilians, that’s another issue. Stiviano claims to be his “archivist” and that consent was given, and a third party who was responsible for their “safekeeping” leaked them. Imaginative, to say the least.

      But regardless of what suit he, or the state of CA, might be able to bring against Stiviano, he’s not going to “wipe the floor with the NBA” – or anyone else, for that matter. He can’t sue the public for what it now thinks of him, or for damages because that reaction led to his being banned. If the NBA takes action to forcibly divest him of the team on the grounds that his opinions are detrimental to the franchise as a whole, the validity or admissibility of the recordings, or even how they were made public, is moot. The issue is about the public’s perception of him based on his opinions and beliefs, and the negative economic impact those perceptions are having on the other owners’ franchises. And the longer he holds onto the team, the more the value of it will drop.

Leave A Comment