Police arrested New Age composer Yanni from his Florida home yesterday on domestic battery charges, after his girlfriend phoned 911 from a locked bathroom.
And while he denies the charges (even if his publicist secretly wishes them true to gain credibility in the 18-34 demographic), it’s hard to look at the mugshot and not picture a crazy Yanni, using an ax to break down the bathroom door while shouting “Come out and take your medicine!” before peeking his long-haired head in and exclaiming “Heeere’s Yanni!”
Except, you know, in a sexy Greek accent.
Violet | March 7, 2006 at 2:30 pm
Yanni is so creepy. *shudder*
splinter9 | March 7, 2006 at 2:34 pm
That’s Dennis Miller’s hair on Billy Bob Thornton’s head.
CheekyChops | March 7, 2006 at 2:43 pm
I guess he’s not shagging Linda “I was on Dynasty” Evans anymore. Unless she’s become so much of a non-celebrity that she’s just known as “Yanni’s girlfriend” now.
femmefatale01 | March 7, 2006 at 3:03 pm
Yeah right. He’d probably break down the door, stick his clarinet in and start playing it to his terrified girlfriend which would cause her to throw herself out the window…oh wait, that’s Kenny G…well they both suck.
bjpack | March 7, 2006 at 3:07 pm
He’s going to find out that this whole thing was a waste of his time when they still refuse to make a Behind the Music for him.
Grphdesi23 | March 7, 2006 at 3:12 pm
Do not f-u-c-k with Yanni!
LoneWolf | March 7, 2006 at 3:29 pm
In related stories, John Tesh has OD’d and Kenny G has a sex tape coming out. Now all those elevator-music-Mozarts need is some gold teeth and whips rollin on twenny-fo’s and they’ll have *real* street cred.
Yanni is Greek, eh? His g/f was probably trying to call emergency for a prolapsed rectum.
Thee Wood Nymph | March 7, 2006 at 3:31 pm
Do you remember when he used to be hot in an ethnic “whose-your-daddy” sort of way? That dark beard – those flowing locks? No?
UNWASHEDMASSES | March 7, 2006 at 3:36 pm
Yanni’s just going to the street for his inspiration. After seeing “It’s Hard Out There For A Pimp” win an Oscar for Best Original Song in a Motion Picture, he made the conscious decision to get in touch with his gangsta side in order to fashion a fusion of hardcore hip-hop with new age wonder. Some of his new tracks are “Pimps and Unicorns”, “Even Avalon Has a Ghetto”, and “Linda Evans Gave Up the Backdoor for Crack.” Insiders speculate it will capture those Enya/DMX fans everywhere.
LOOKWHATICANDO | March 7, 2006 at 3:44 pm
He does look a lil,, hmmmmm Tom Cruise’ish in this photo.. yikes
SuperSpence | March 7, 2006 at 3:56 pm
My dead grandmother could kick Yanni’s ass.
MystressJade | March 7, 2006 at 3:57 pm
He was extremely hot when he did that Acropolis concert years ago…..he looks like a child molester now.
I raise my rum and coke to posts #7 & #9…prolapsed rectum, yuk…lol
Kimmie | March 7, 2006 at 4:18 pm
I don’t know who Yanni is but he is creepy looking to me.
greekdiva | March 7, 2006 at 4:45 pm
Who the fuck is this :S
He looks like a sort of pedophile anyways…
Lala | March 7, 2006 at 4:59 pm
He’s the ex-boyfriend of Krystle Carrington from Dynasty.
Zegna | March 7, 2006 at 5:11 pm
“Heeere’s Yanni!”
Hahahahahah..!
Pez_D_Spencer | March 7, 2006 at 5:15 pm
If Francis Dolarhyde (Tom Noonan) hadn’t gotten blown away at the end of Manhunter, I think the booking photo would look a lot like that.
Evangelia | March 7, 2006 at 5:28 pm
ha ha. don’t fuck with the greeks, malaka.
prideofchucky | March 7, 2006 at 6:25 pm
I guess missed that episode of COPS….
No_Angel | March 7, 2006 at 6:35 pm
The captions says “Yanni” and my head says “Dennis Miller”.
I don’t know which one is worse!
Any ideas?
honey | March 7, 2006 at 8:04 pm
what is the world coming to??
next thing we know, zamfir will be slingin ass on the street to pay for his new pan flute.
ishtar | March 7, 2006 at 8:14 pm
doesnt his mug look a bit like The Fonz??
The Serial Cynic | March 7, 2006 at 8:51 pm
I am guessing that “Yanni’s girlfriend” put on a copy of “Live at the Acropolis” and he just wigged out and beat the snot out of her. I’ve reached this conclusion because my mother just loves Yanni, and my dad used to beat the hell out of her.
Wait,… that wasn’t funny at all.
I better call my therapist now.
missscoobie | March 7, 2006 at 9:04 pm
what a tool!
Craig & "em" | March 7, 2006 at 9:09 pm
Wow! I never thought that this day would come. I guess what I mean is…I thought the headline would read “Yanni’s Girlfriend Beats Him Up with a Flute or Whatever Instrument He Plays”.
LaydeeBug | March 7, 2006 at 9:11 pm
Sagapo Baby! Ahhh those sexy wife-beating Mediterraneans. Matakia moo. Linda Evans is his girlfriend. So Crystal Carrington got her ass whupped, huh? As Jerry Seinfeld would say “….mmm…thats-a-shame.”
greekdiva | March 7, 2006 at 9:12 pm
Lmao #18 :P
Damn right
Evangelia | March 7, 2006 at 9:48 pm
i love you too laydee.
you were talking to me, right?
or i’ll beat you up, yanni-style.
hafaball | March 7, 2006 at 10:59 pm
Ah one of the great reasons to put a phone in the bathroom, to lock yourself away from someone who is potentially trying to harm you. Isn’t technology great!?
msassassin | March 7, 2006 at 11:02 pm
“Except, you know, in a sexy Greek accent”
Erm NO. A Greek accent might sounds sexy at three in the morning while you are waiting for a souvlaki…
Bellisima | March 8, 2006 at 1:34 am
How do you say “trailer trash” in Greek? I not wannamakeafucka wit you.
Pez_D_Spencer | March 8, 2006 at 3:06 am
Also a bit of Al Pacino from “Heat” in that pic. Although, Yanni probably is less of an over-actor than Al.
WTF ever happened to the Pacino who could play understated roles?
mamacita | March 8, 2006 at 8:12 am
Why didn’t he just listen to some of his own new-agey-I’ll-help-you-relax-in-a-bubble-bath- music and then he wouldn’t have been enraged enough to beat his girlfriend’s ass. I think his music is one of the reasons that there is so much violence in the workplace. Well, that and the hormones that they inject in chicken.
sikofdis | March 8, 2006 at 8:16 am
He redefines sucking on an hourly basis…this made my week! Now, I can only hope that terms of the inevitable restraining order will be for this talentless piece of turd to stay more than 500 feet away from every recording studio on the planet.
Shaun | March 8, 2006 at 10:22 am
Hahaha he has the face that should be on the back of a milk carton. “Stay away from this guy”.
HollyJ | March 8, 2006 at 11:32 am
He snapped because he hadn’t had feta or phyllo for two consecutive meals.
Yanni, malakos menos, it’s supposed to be Ioannis.
Spindoc | March 9, 2006 at 5:53 pm
Isn’t dating Yanni equivilent to being beat up psychologically?
sexydarin | March 9, 2006 at 6:48 pm
Smack ma bitch yo yanni smack ma bitch yo
Dee | March 9, 2006 at 7:53 pm
he looks better now than he ever did…i thought he looked creepier before.
Online Casinos | October 12, 2007 at 2:23 am
why don’t he beats his ass!!! f***er
Kiki | November 6, 2008 at 6:16 am
2008-hmm,ugly and mean comments,big shame!The end of the world is coming!He he