Will.I.am bitchslaps Perez Hilton. With words.

June 22nd, 2009 // 132 Comments

Perez Hilton was allegedly assaulted last night while partying after the MuchMusic Video Awards in Toronto. He claims Will.I.am of the Black Eyed Peas was the one who hit him, and instead of calling the police, Perez started tweeting about it. Scope out Perez’s tweets via TMZ which essentially ruin whatever legitimacy Twitter gained from the Iranian elections:

– I’m in shock. I need the police ASAP. Please come to the SoHo Metropolitan Hotel now. Please.about 5 hours ago from Sidekick
– I was assaulted by Will.I.Am of the Black Eyed Peas and his security guards. I am bleeding. Please, I need to file a police report. No joke. — about 5 hours ago from Sidekick
– Still waiting for the police. The bleeding has stopped. I need to document this. Please, can the police come to the SoHo Met Hotel. — about 5 hours ago from Sidekick
– I spoke to my lawyer. I really need to talk to the authorities. Please come to the SoHo Met Hotel. Have called the police. Need them here. — about 5 hours ago from Sidekick
– The Toronto police are here now. Thank you. Please stop calling them. — about 5 hours ago from Sidekick
– Thank u all from the bottom of my heart for ur concern. The police are investigating the assault now. I did the right thing by reporting it. — about 3 hours ago from web

Will.I.am posted a video last night asserting his innocence, (Turns out it was the Black Eyed Peas manager Polo Molina who “attacked” Perez.) and took the immediate piss out of Perez by asking, why someone would Twitter instead of call the police if they were attacked? Allow me: Because Perez Hilton is nothing more than the same brand of media-obsessed celebutard he so vehemently draws semen on which proves he never really was a scathing observer of pop culture. Just a guy who wants to be Britney.

I went there.

superficial

  1. Trousers

    What a pleasant morning suprise.

    …something something karma.

  2. dongler

    Perez is a fat whiney bastard he is crying over on his website. To funny.

  3. Sleve Coat

    Glad someone finally laid one on this douchebag. It had to happen sooner later – now we just need someone to bitch slap Spencer Pratt and the world will be a better place

  4. Sleve Coat

    Glad someone finally laid one on this douchebag. It had to happen sooner later – now we just need someone to bitch slap Spencer Pratt and the world will be a better place

  5. Elizabeth

    Why is it ok for Perez Hilton to call someone a fag?

    That’s incredibly annoying, as I’ve been listening to him spout off about Prop Eight and gay rights for months now.

  6. meowcatfish

    Whoa…them’s fighting words.

  7. LEELEE

    this has made my day

  8. J. Stone

    Thank god some one finaly said that about perez. The guy is a drama queen and worse of all a hate monger. This site is way better.

  9. should i be baffled that a phone was used to beg several times over a 2 hour period to request a call to the police instead of the phone being used to actually… i dont know…. call the police?

    wouldnt “9-1-1-send” be easier than “tap tap tappity tap tap piss and moan tap tap tappity tap tap tap…..”

    on a related note all these overly delicate celebrities are starting to really tick me off

  10. Anyone who Tweets is a retard to begin with. Anyone who would actually be signed up to get tweets from this guy is even worse.

  11. Mozza

    perez.com has THE FUNNIEST vid of him whining for 11mins looking oh so distressed and drama-queeny!
    Haha.

  12. Soo

    What a fag.

  13. Boy, I hope he’s alright. It would suck if there was any bruising, or God forbid, broken bones. I’m talking about WILL.I.am’s manager, of course. If he hit, Paco Sheraton with a loose fist, it can cause problems. Then again, he was hitting, Paco Sheraton. Probably like hitting the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man, or his sister. Would love to see some cellphone vid, or any other vid of that! Sweet! Wishing violence on another person is wrong. But if it happens all on its’ own, especially to a douche, like, Paco, then it’s friggen cool!

  14. jaime

    you went there!

    yeah, and you should also mention he’s good friends with (at least) paris hilton, katy perry, and lady gaga, so he can’t really be objective about some things.
    that’s a bad journalist.

    i know that if you were sleeping with megan fox you’d still post true stories about her (even if the only true stories megan fox ever delivers are her breasts)

  15. AmericanWhiteTrash

    I approve of this observation. Finally your sticking it to goofballs like this and not just sugar coated. More please.

  16. Lain

    Actually he called the police before he ever twittered. Faggots.

  17. Rob

    Lavandeira is a complete and total faggot.

  18. Lain

    “@adimjuna I called the police BEFORE I Tweeted about it. They were not showing up. I felt helpless.”

    You guys are a sack of dicks and shit. I understand that Perez is a drama queen, but get your facts straight.

  19. Poor Perez. He’s a fame whore without any talent.
    Poor Lain doesn’t realize Perez is a fame whore without any talent.

  20. “I am bleeding”… from the ass…

  21. Max Planck

    Did the construction worker and indian chief come too?

  22. Grand Dragon

    It’s a fact that moon crickets can’t stand beaners and butt-pirates. Especially beaner butt-pirates. It was a perfect storm.

  23. Mozza

    Fuckin ell Lain, stop whinging like a bell end.
    Loads of people get hit when they deserve it. Tke it like a fuckin man even if ur a massive queer.
    Sounds an awful lot like ud like to suck perez better.
    Blurgh

  24. De

    Will.I.Am and the BEP just needed to start something because their new *album* sucked. All their album is is one constant chorus after another, with a *club* beat, hoping to be the next big single at the gay clubs. (And Im not biased, their earlier albums werent so bad).
    I don’t care if people dont like perez, Im not his biggest fan either. But violence is NEVER *right* or *ok*.

    PS, Fergie is still fugly.

  25. Lain

    Poor Lain doesn’t realize Perez is a fame whore without any talent.

    -
    I don’t give a shit about Perez, but if you wanna look like a dipshit by stating your opinion based on incorrect statements, be my guest.

  26. Deuce Bigalow

    I fucking cant STAND this moron. I would like to see GSP do the assault him instead of the black eyed pea guy

    I sincerely hope it hurt

  27. Lain

    Fuckin ell Lain, stop whinging like a bell end.
    Loads of people get hit when they deserve it. Tke it like a fuckin man even if ur a massive queer.
    Sounds an awful lot like ud like to suck perez better.
    Blurgh
    -
    The fuck you just say? If you got a problem, deal with it. They’re just words.

  28. ally

    “I don’t give a shit about Perez, but if you wanna look like a dipshit by stating your opinion based on incorrect statements, be my guest.”
    -
    No, no, no…tis u who looks like a dipship my friend.
    Order in the court – we must all get our facts straight if we don’t want to upset Lain

  29. Guy

    If it wasn’t this Will.I.Am guy but his manager, then why do you say it is for the title of this article/update?

    WTF?

  30. Mozza

    -The fuck you just say? If you got a problem, deal with it. They’re just words.-

    Back atcha

  31. lalalaura

    Thank you!!! It’s about damn time someone called that douche out. How the hell did he get famous? Are people really so afraid of getting little dicks drawn on their faces, they kiss his ass? He’s so fucking annoying.

  32. Dana

    I think Perez is just upset he didn’t get any BEP love from the behind… Gayzor!

  33. Every time I look at his website I am completely stumped as to why anyone thinks it’s hilarious or even gossip. He just draws non funny things on photos right? Is that what people consider writing or even comedy? Is his audience 14 year old boys?

  34. Every time I look at his website I am completely stumped as to why anyone thinks it’s hilarious or even gossip. He just draws non funny things on photos right? Is that what people consider writing or even comedy? Is his target audience 14 year old boys?

  35. so, so, ROUHG

    So where was he bleeding from?

  36. Courtyardpigeon

    He obviously didn’t hit him hard enough because he’s still breathing. Wait, who is this fag again and why did I read this?

  37. kerplunk

    Although everyone knows that Perez is overdramatic and writes/says crazy things, assault is reality and it is illegal. You should never have to be in physical fear for yourself. Ever. I have, too, lost all respect for will.i.am and the Black Eyed Peas. This is ridiculous, and I hope that will.i.am’s manager gets jail time for this and will.i.am loses the lawsuit. If we allow things like this to go on in our society, it will only get worse. Grow the fuck up, will.i.am.

  38. kc

    I think this is hilarious. Perez got bitchslapped. He is such a media whore and if he were truly “assaulted” he would have callled the police. Does he think that the Toronto authorities monitor his twitter action? Loser!

  39. kc

    I think this is hilarious. Perez got bitchslapped. He is such a media whore and if he were truly “assaulted” he would have callled the police. Does he think that the Toronto authorities monitor his twitter action? Loser!

  40. Esteeh

    This beat down was well deserved. No one even cares WHO did it! I totally agree with the comments above. How is this guy famous for drawing dicks on celebrity pictures? and why celebs hang out and line themselves up with this idiot is so obvious

  41. Hilton Hunter

    This is the first time I`ve ever seen this Perez fuckwit. What a fucking moron. All I can say is that whoever hit him didn`t hit him hard enough.

  42. Venom

    That fat whiny bitch deserved it.
    You talk shit about people all day for a living it is bound to happen,

  43. Me

    Mr. Superficial,

    Your website is hilarious!! LOVE it.

    P.S. Perez is a whiny b!tch.

  44. FACE

    What a fag

  45. Mark

    What kind of f’ing moron gets assaulted, whips out his cell phone, and starts twittering?? The phone is in your f’ing hand, moron! If you’ve been assaulted, try calling 911. That’s 9-1-1. If you don’t want to call the cops yourself, you must not need them there, so shut the f— up!

  46. Could someone please do the world a favor and break this guys arms so he can’t Twitter or use his blog anymore? I’m pretty sure it would be impossible for him to stay relevant.

  47. Could someone please do the world a favor and rip off everyone one of this fat flaming retard’s fingers so he can’t Twitter or use his blog anymore? I’m pretty sure it would be impossible for him to stay relevant.

  48. Lanky O'Toole

    Perez Hilton is nothing more than the same brand of media-obsessed celebutard he so vehemently draws semen on which proves he never really was a scathing observer of pop culture. Just a guy who wants to be Britney.

    —-

    Bravo

  49. Johnny Lava

    …Will look’s suspect in this video. A lil too sweet around the lips. Maybe Will is gay and Perrez felt dissed and got all bithcy because Will wouldn’t give him any attention. CAT FIGHT ROTFLMAO XD

  50. Ariana

    In my city, he got what he deserved =D. Only reason celebs prolly suck up to him are for +ve feedback me thinks.

    His video’s hilarious. If only he could be a man =[

Leave A Comment