Will Smith recruits for Scientology, is also freaking cheap

January 9th, 2008 // 115 Comments

Will Smith handed out gifts to crew members after filming ended for his new movie Hancock. While it’s common practice for big stars to hand out “wrap presents,” Will Smith’s generous trinket has undoubtedly left him in danger of getting a boom mic shoved up his ass. NY Daily News reports:

His recent gift after wrapping next summer’s comedy “Hancock” was a card good for a personality test at your local Scientology center.
Never mind that such tests are given free by the church anyway. The quiz is designed to convert people to the religion by identifying personality flaws that – surprise! – Scientology can fix right up for you.

Apparently there’s one flaw Scientology can’t fix: Being a cheap bastard. Damn, Will Smith, a personality test? That’s low. I can take one of those online for free anytime I want. In fact, I took a test the other day that told me which Star Wars character I resemble. After several hours of changing my answers, the results finally said I’m Darth Vader. Yeah, let’s see Scientology say I’m an awesome space dude. I don’t think so.

Photo: Getty Images
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  1. combustion8

    god what a douche… please mr. sickle cell find this man.

  2. Gabby

    wow, that’s lame!

  3. tommygun

    damn

  4. p911gt10c

    we need to follow the German’s lead and ban this “religion”.
    Or must make everyone watch that South Park episode where they stick it to ‘em.

  5. Jim

    What the hell is it about celebs that makes them so susceptible to this crap?? Do they really have such little powers of reason and analysis?

  6. D

    Actually, Scientology WILL tell you that you’re an awesome space dude.

  7. Brudda

    Yeah maybe Sickle Cell, Marfan’s or the black man’s favorite, Ripple & Thunderbird & Colt 45, will find him.

    For fuck’s sake, the last time brutha put out a good film was….. never.

    Anyway, he’s laughing at whitey all the way to the bank.

  8. Auntie Kryst

    How about a free gift for us dupes that saw I Am Legend? What a pile o’ crap that movie was.

  9. combustion8

    @8

    you are so right… but he was so clever talking to his dog like it was his kid… barrrrrrrf!!

  10. choni

    Adding insult to injury, the “personality test” is already “free.” Any scientology center will gladly give one to anyone willing. It is a very long scantron-type form that asks you tons of personal questions, and (spoiler alert!) the result of every test…(wait for it!)

    “YOU NEED SCIENTOLOGY!”

  11. LL

    Damn, Scientology got Will and Jada too?

    Shit…

  12. MindRiot

    I thought all these kooks already missed the Hale-Bopp comet?
    Too late fools.

  13. twimmy420

    Man, I always thought he was cool too…

    I hate finding out someone’s into scientology…

  14. tight lipped smiler

    @5 Scientology is expert at tapping into an actor’s inborn belief that his navel is the center of the universe and the pimple on his ass a sign of the Second Coming.

  15. veggi

    Why haven’t the Scientologists fixed his skin color?

  16. Zane

    Tom Cruise is so jealous of Will’s manwife Jada.

  17. D. Richards (Surgeon.)

    When I lived in Hollywood, I’d see those filthy scientologist vermin out on Hollywood Boulevard with their ‘stress test’ centers (which consisted of a cheap fucking table and some ‘official’ looking device that was designed to give the impression that scietology was scientific). All the tourists would be gathered ’round watching. What is this crazy place, Hollywood?

    Will Smith.. What an asshole. Think about how arrogant of a message that is of Willie.

    ‘Here, take this card. You’ll need to be prepared to spend thousands of dollars on your personality audit, but I know you’re all good for it; you work in production. Maybe you could be like me someday.’

    Will’s just fufilling his ancestral urge to copy the whiteman. Hell, rich whitey’s doin’ it!

  18. Damon Demon

    Will Smith and Tom Cruise are gay together.

    Scientology is a cult that suckers people away from their money and mind.

  19. Tony

    Great. Will Smith takes a 500 question exam, they analyze the results, and say “there are 25 things we can fix, but obviously the n i g g e r part is beyond our control”.

  20. Reggie Bush

    Shit he’s a Scientologist? thats another one I can cross of my “hot guy” list. WANKER.

  21. Bubbles

    Effing sheep! That’s it, I’m done with movies. Sad, sad, sad, you’d think actors would be more original. Oh, wait, they’re actors. They are born to be directed, like sheep. Oh……(epiphany)….OK, I get it.

    Moral of this bullshit diatribe I just wrote…..don’t go to Hollywood….stay on my writing path….loff my way to the bank as I write screenplays and make sheep perform them.

  22. It's been rumored

    TCLTC & WSLTC. Not sure if TCLWSC or WSLTCC. Jada is supposedly a huge dyke as well.

  23. Bubbles

    7- almost choked on my drink laughing. BUT, remember there’s still Denzel, although he seems to be making questionable choices lately.

  24. FRIST would you like me to fist your asshole?

  25. I know stuff

    15- find your own name troll……….

    @8 sayin’ Auntie – movie fucking sucked.. they should have made it a double feature with Crossroads..

  26. Samantha

    I guess I knew about the Scientology but for some reason I didn’t think he was an all-out cult psycho. The cheap part…well…a black man hands out a “gift” that he got for free. That’s news? Isn’t it in the last verse of the National Anthem?

  27. Veggi would you like your asshole to be fisted too?

  28. we aint fooled, wildo

    Will is a black man who’s pretending to be white, married to a man pretending to be a woman, and promoting a cult that pretends to be a science-based religion. No wonder all of this is so popular among professional actors.

  29. guest1234567

    And for a mere $380K, you too can be as enlightened as a Hollywierd start.

    http://www.clambake.org/archive/prices.html

  30. guest1234567

    And for a mere $380K, you too can be as enlightened as a Hollywierd star

    http://www.clambake.org/archive/prices.html

  31. @ 27 How did I get the anal dwelling butt monkey troll today??

  32. my comment

    Obviously Scientology doesn’t fix lousy acting either.

  33. #31, Leave already you sorry ass troll. “dwelling butt monkey troll”? Come on troll come up with something better than that.

  34. The Office Whore

    Man, I miss the good ol’ days. Fresh Prince, Charles in Charge, Alf, Dawsons Creek.. Just kidding. I totally NEVER liked any of those seriously non-ruling, sappy shows. Don’t judge me!! Fine, so I liked them. Dammit, wish I knew when to shut the hell up..

  35. aeuwave

    i didn’t think scientology recognized minorities (at least i think i read that somewhere)… hopefully this “religion” will go away soon.

  36. Speaking on behalf of all black men we are traditionaly cheap bastards.

  37. p0nk

    i’m waiting to see if Jada produces another icelandic snow goose/bjork cross humanoid that can speak in a secret language with suri. That, my friends, will be a more sure sign of the apocalypse than Britney, LiLo, and Paris teaming up for a Nobel.

  38. Shallow Val

    I don’t hate him per se, but he plays THE SAME CHARACTER in every movie, The Fresh Prince.

    I mean really, is he trying to be the next Jack Nicholson? I didn’t see his new movie but the only reason I would is because of the dog. And since he only has the dog to talk to during the first half of the movie, the chance of him “homey-ing” it up is smaller.

    But then again, there’s that stupid triailer line “eat your greens, I’m not playing with you;” just the same tired old bs that comes out of his mouth.

  39. PunkA

    I have no problem with Scientology. People can believe weird stuff, and this is no different. Never hurt anyone. And it is fun to make fun of, so that is a bonus.

    But giving out free stuff from your religion as a gift to proselyte for it is pretty lame. I understand he believes in it, and it has meaning to him, so he thinks it a good gift. But it wasn’t. It sucked ass.

    Of course, rumor has it, sucking ass is something he likes to do, especially with TC. They tea bag, and hope that femmy Dianey HS Musical kid joins them soon.

  40. My boyfriend waits tables in a restaurant around the block from Scientology’s Planetary headquarters.

    Scientology doesn’t fix cheap: if the tips he gets from those taking classes there or volunteering for SeaOrg are any indication, Scientology makes you a cheap bastard for life.

  41. My boyfriend waits stalls in a public bathroom.

  42. my comment

    If Scientology [mind control for the idle rich] is a ‘religion’, then let’s just make shopping a religion too.

  43. null

    #38, the dog is the best actor in the film. he also sings a bob marley song to the dying dog in once scene. a new low for anyone in film. maybe IF that scene was directed by john waters, then it might have been worth something.

  44. PunkA

    Hey Jimbo troll, I thought I had heard you were with George Michael in that stall in Beverly Hills. But I didn’t know it was his day job.

  45. maximus

    i guess “i am legend” will be the last will smith movie i ever see. i hate the fucking scientologists.

  46. This is nothing. When I wrapped up filming on my docu-drama “Jesus Died For Your Sins (Yeah Fuckin’ Right)” and gave each of the evangelicals there Q’urans as “fuck you very much” gifts, I was confronted with loads of adoration and offers for sex. But I told the Catholic priests that I was no longer a pre teen, and technically out of their league as a result.

  47. Shallow Val

    43 – “he also sings a bob marley song to the dying dog ”

    SHUT…..UP…He does not. Please tell me you are kidding. Please, please for the sake of all that is relevant….tell me you’re kidding. I mean, when my animal died, I was crying my ass off, not singing him a fucking song.

    Stupid Will Smith.

  48. silentology

    well shit, i had no idea. there goes all my respect for him. how pathetic.
    now someone should write a story on how scientology makes you praise hitler.

  49. #43 the dog dies? WAY TO RUIN THE MOVIE FOR ME!!!

  50. Shallow Val, unfortunately, he DOES sing to the damn dog.

    And Will has caught Tom Cruise’s crazy bug. HE got away with the Hitler comment, but if he keeps this shit up, he’ll see his star fall just like that big-toothed midget.

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