When Adam Lambert Attacks

September 17th, 2010 // 124 Comments

When you think about celebrities roughing up the paparazzi you mostly think about your Sean Penns, Tobey Maguires, or more recently, Mel Gibsons. Well, add blowjob-simulating sparkle-boys to that list because yesterday Adam Lambert surprisingly opened a can in Miami (above) which has him facing battery charges as of this morning. I guess admitting you got your ass kicked by a kid who wears studded codpieces the size of my house is worth the shot at a lucrative lawsuit. Personally, I would’ve just lied to people and said it was my twin brother in these photos. “Who? Me? Ha! You’re hilarious. No way would Gay Freddie Munster get the drop on- Oh, God, a bee! A bee, a bee! *hides under beach towel* Don’t let it ouch me.”

UPDATE: Adam is defending himself on Twitter.

Photos: Splash News


  1. Adam Lambert Attacks the Paparazzi
    Leia S.
    Commented on this photo:

    haha this one is just too funny to say, its self explanatory LOL

  2. Adam Lambert Attacks the Paparazzi
    Commented on this photo:

    bahahahaha – that looks so gay!


    What do you get when a Mexican “papanazi” and a ginger fag and pretend rock fag dry hump on the beach?

  4. Adam Lambert Attacks the Paparazzi
    Commented on this photo:

    that photog is laughing his ass off? battery? more like foreplay!

  5. Adam Lambert Attacks the Paparazzi
    Commented on this photo:

    photog is smiling

  6. Ace

    I know when I’m attacked I smile the whole time too.
    (It keeps me from crying…)

  7. Adam Lambert Attacks the Paparazzi
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks more like a tickle fight to me…

  8. Paco Van Pacostein

    I like how he refutes that his actions constituted battery. Little known fact, this guy has a law degree from Honduras University of Law.

  9. Adam Lambert Attacks the Paparazzi
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh my GOD!!!! How would you like to be that poor paparazzi and have photographic proof that some FAG kicked your ass!! Lambert has no muscle, finger and toe nails painted black….maybe he was just trying to cop a feel?

  10. The only battery going on in those pictures is the battery in Lambert’s pocket rocket …

    I can just picture and HEAR Lambert as he’s slapping that camera guy

    “Sthhtop it you Beeitch!!! Sthhtop taking picturesthhhh of me!!! I don’t have my make up on you brute!!! You cad!!! I stthhwear if you publish thosthe photossth I will so kick your asstthhhhhh ….”

  11. Roni

    F***CK you haters are stupid! STFU and go away you idiots! I wish the paps would stalk you assholes 24-7 until you disappear!

  12. Mel

    JFC what a revolting bunch of homophobes hang out at The Superficial *brb making mental note to never come back here again*

    • eatme

      fuck off cunt. adam lambert is shit. american idol is shit. his style is intrinsically linked to his sexual orientation (ie. he is a gay performer), so we can hate him for being gay all we want as long as his style IS his gayness.

      • You are just a miserable piece of shit! What, you got a problem with gays? I’m pretty sure you spend your nights jacking off to a bunch of lesbians so why be judgemental to gays? You should fuck off! Or wait, GO FUCK YOURSELF BITCH!!!

  13. Shelly

    I love adam

  14. Adam Lambert Attacks the Paparazzi
    Commented on this photo:

    he looks like a gay immigration agent chasing a guy with a camera and no papers. Are they in AZ?

  15. HRH Adam

    I would kick the living shit out of this bastard

  16. Adam Lambert Attacks the Paparazzi
    Commented on this photo:

    You go Adam. BTW….you are pretty hot without all that make up!

  17. Steph

    What a bunch of ugly, white, straight, entitled male bastards hiding on the internet to say nasty things that their mothers would slap the shit out of them for saying, well If they had a mother. There has to be a reason for all of the hate and self-loathing here. Bastard would explain it.

    • eatme

      and when you say you hate metallica or pantera or whatever do we call you a fat man hating lesbian? put some perspective on this.

    • Actually i’m not a bastard and my mother and father would both be calling Lambert a queer and making fun of him for this display of estrogen!!!

  18. those shorts are f*ing heinous. thought this guy was gay? shouldn’t he know how to dress himself??

  19. kristy

    Awww, you guys are just jeolous that all the girls are creamin in their panties over Adam and not you, lol. Fyi, mean spirited men are not sexy.

  20. LJ

    More Paps should be beaten, and on a regular basis.

  21. Adam Lambert Attacks the Paparazzi
    Commented on this photo:

    Thats not a can…The pap is laughing in most of the pics

  22. Adam Lambert Attacks the Paparazzi
    Commented on this photo:

    ahhahahahhahahhahhahha! that dude’s getting beat up by a guy who wears toe nail polish.

  23. Adam Lambert Attacks the Paparazzi
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice manicure/pedicure and the polish color ain’t bad either… what an assbag

  24. RasputinsLiver



    Man, he looks so stereotypically pansy-ass. Is he slapping at the camera dude?

    I’d laugh at this fucking jizz guzzler too if his cornholed self was runin’ after me, slappin’ at me an’ tryin’ to pretend he’s a man.


    Ha! Fuckin’ Jizzhead!


  25. wendileen

    homophobes are so boring

  26. gigi

    nuh-uh! this is porn! lol mexican camera dude is having too much fun

  27. Megan

    The real crime here is that outfit. I thought gay guys were supposed to have a better fashion sense?

  28. Matt

    Doesn’t the camera man look kinda like Jon Gosseline?

  29. Adam Lambert Attacks the Paparazzi
    Commented on this photo:

    what disturbs me from this picture is that the guy shaves his legs… GROSS

  30. Adam Lambert Attacks the Paparazzi
    Commented on this photo:

    hahahaha he is SO GAY… the manicure hahahahahaha

  31. Adam Lambert Attacks the Paparazzi
    Commented on this photo:

    Ahah, there’s a yellowish stain on his ass

  32. Poo

    Ahah, there’s a yellowish stain on his ass

  33. Dick

    Just looks like they’re assing around, literally.

  34. Jimmy

    They just look like a couple of gays rough housing. And I think that will be the verdict from the judge.

  35. Adam Lambert Attacks the Paparazzi
    Commented on this photo:

    what disturbs ME is his “toenails are painted black” like his fingernails. that is OVER the top GAY. i bet he wears panties as well underneath those shorts

  36. Adam Lambert Attacks the Paparazzi
    Commented on this photo:

    F1RST B1TCH3S!

    Can someone please say:

  37. Sandy

    This blog must be written by somebody’s 12 yr. old trying to spew what he thinks are dirty words and dirty comments. Of all of the sites I have visited this is the most uneducated and nasty to date. Never to visit again! I won’t be missed. Thinking people are rarely respected by germs like these people responding here.

    • Lawrence

      Well said Sandy, hiding behind computer screens gives these people balls apparently. No one would pay any attention to them outside of the Internet, just a bunch of sad losers attracting more sad losers. Masquerading as clever witted hipsters when in fact all they are is vulgar lowbrow reprobates with delusions of grandeur.

  38. Marcus


  39. Adam Lambert Attacks the Paparazzi
    Commented on this photo:

    Are you sure that A.L. is not sexually molesting that man, versus assaulting him?

  40. Adam Lambert Attacks the Paparazzi
    Commented on this photo:

    Or maybe you`re stupid Marie

  41. Adam Lambert Attacks the Paparazzi
    Paul Coin
    Commented on this photo:

    Adam Lambert is gay. He has polished nails! hahahahaha

  42. Adam Lambert Attacks the Paparazzi
    Commented on this photo:

    i think he just wanted to tickle the nice man

  43. Adam Lambert Attacks the Paparazzi
    Commented on this photo:

    This guy is a douchebag! I feel sorry for the photographer

  44. Adam Lambert Attacks the Paparazzi
    Commented on this photo:


  45. Christopher Lambert

    Who daphuk is Adam Lambert?
    I don’t know, hollywwod kids today. Their dad makes a few Highlander movies and they think the world is theirs. Sheeesh!

  46. Adam Lambert Attacks the Paparazzi
    Commented on this photo:

    Adam should have mounted his ass and made him his biotch. That would have given the other low-life paps something to photograph and sell to the gossip rags…

  47. Adam Lambert Attacks the Paparazzi
    Commented on this photo:

    The guy is laughing…

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