What the Hell Happened Yesterday?

March 3rd, 2010 // 18 Comments

And I’m back.

Apparently I picked a good day to get sick because literally only three things happened yesterday. Some might say other news occurred, but trust me, this is all you need to know. I’d never steer you wrong just to deflect from my drinking:

- Kristen Stewart attended the premiere of Robert Pattinson’s Remember Me which clearly says everything about them fucking and nothing at all about Summit Entertainment owning the Twilight franchise and Remember Me. [Huffington Post]

- Simon Monjack specifically asked Brittany Murphy to write in her will that he gets nothing which apparently was an elaborate scheme to do her mom. Wow. Where does the dreamy end and the walrus con man begin? [E! News]

- Blanket Jackson may or may not have been the target of a stun gun supposedly ordered online by Jermaine Jackson’s 13-year-old son even though it’s obvious what happened here: Joe Jackson needs to keep his “teaching instruments” locked up. Seriously, you can’t make a new Jackson 5 being sloppy. Or it gets the hose. [People, Us Weekly]

Photos: Splash News
superficial

  1. Plus Naomi Campbell assaulted someone again. Can someone throw her violent ass in jail already?

  2. Ha… I love the woman’s face behind the plastic in pic 8. Definitely a Twi-hard.

    *off to kill myself for using the word Twi-hard*

  3. AteIsEnough

    Kristen Stewart really is a fugly talentless hack. She really seems to think her shit doesn’t stink…I can’t wait until next year when she’s a nobody again. Maybe then she’ll have manners.

  4. veda

    Does Kristin have a stylist?? She wears the most random outfits. She needs to dress it up with some bling or something. Here this looks good Kristin… http://www.jewelry.com/piece.do?id=792112

  5. clairargent

    robert pattison is just nasty looking.

  6. merilhepburn

    Kristen Stewart dresses like she is from The Sims.

  7. Drundel

    That dress is HIDEOUS!!!! As cute a girl as she is, that dress makes her look like Kristen Dunst.

  8. lori

    Did they pick Robert Pattinson up off of Skid Row and put an ugly suit on him? Shouldn’t they have washed him first?

  9. Wootang

    Jesus. Would it kill Kristen Stewart to smile? When is their mutual bearding going to be unveiled?

  10. How does a 19 year old girl look so much like a mid 30′s mother trying to relive her younger rock n roll days?

  11. gigi

    I’m sorry, I don’t care who’s swooning, this dude still looks like he’s got a mild form of something that doesn’t make you ‘aCt gUd’ [and obviously I'm not talking about his actual acting skills, since I've never seen him do that...]

  12. your momma

    hey superfish, its a good thing no one committed suicide yesterday isnt it? i mean you wouldnt have bee around to make fun of it eh?

  13. Jimbo

    lol yeah that’s a twi-hard alright in the 8th pic

  14. He is a smart guy. He does not have to worry about anything!!

  15. captain america

    another day of fooling americans!!

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