VIDEO: Paris Hilton sings to Hugh Hefner

Conductor, I was operating under the belief that she has no brain and cannot be killed by conventional methods. I figured if her publicist died she’d run out of food, and if her gynecologist died, her gigi-rot would take over her whole body and reduce her to compost.

Oops! She already IS compost. My bad.

I can’t figure it out, was she “sucking or blowing” the words to happy b-day.

Is anyone else perplexed by the absence of applause in the video? I mean, I thought wherever Paris slimes around there would be plenty of clap.

Anyone notice at beginning of clip the weird “uh” thing for pauses? She must have read about such a flourish in ‘Singing for Dummies’

Off to the loo to upchuck now.

Her throat must not be used to the absence of cock yet. That would explain her upchuck sounds at the end of each verse.

HEY “NEW GUY” GET:

1) A LIFE
2) A JOB
3) LAID

ALL IN THAT ORDER.

aww, c’mon. new guy is fake!
or didn’t you get the memo? lol
sid, (33), my new mac won’t play it, either. and i am eternally grateful for that.

you know, i never realized hef had so much class.
compared to PH, that is.
blech.

#155…HAHAHAHAHAHHA

This is one of the funniest and embarrassing things I’ve seen … at least since the last time. Now my 8 & 10 yr olds are walking around the house punchuating their sentences with -urggh! Even they think she’s a hoax!

Paris officially took the ‘happy’ out of ‘happy birthday’.

Happy, Paris?!

@159

Just so I can make sure I’m clear on this……you were letting your 8 & 10 yr. olds watch the horror that is Paris singing in her underwear? Niiiice.

Ugh. I would really like to kick her in the teeth right about now.

Paris pussy is Sooooo Hot is on F I R E!

#110 Your a slimy douchebag or just a rabid wild dog going around clubs humping the legs of every chick you see….Basically you are saying you would stick your dick in a diseased infested hole…maybe thats your style but not mine

Will someone pls fill me in on the Mother Theresa reference? Please please tell me now that she hasn’t drawn the comparison herself?!…

#148 Nadira, you need glasses…and probably psychiatric counselling!
There’s nothing hot about Paris hilton, unless you count the sores on her crotch. No, wait…they’re COLD sores!

She is sporting quite an impressive “gunt”.

In all honesty, her album is being released very soon and I haven’t been this excited about something that Paris is putting out since the release of her thesis on Degerative Molecular Abnormalities and Chromosomal Diseases. It was an in-depth and comprehensive study, fascinating really.

Bravo Paris!

@165

Paris is being scouted to possibly play the part of Mother Theresa in some Bollywood flick. See the following link

http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20060403/ennew_afp/afpentertainmentindiafilmparishilton_060403135629

P.S. There’s this super awesome thing called a “search engine” and there’s an especially popular one called a “Google”, which is how I found that link. Amazing, I know!!!!

Don’t be dissing her tummy. I have a tummy like that and I worked hard for it!! And I bet all of you guys are members of the flat tummy brigade, huh??!!

OK now that i’ve ranted..

The bitch sings like a masturbating cat. But I’m glad she sang a cappella so everybody can see what a overrated skank she really is. The bitch is dumb. “You’re 80, you look like you’re 40 and act like you’re 20″. Inspirational!

#156 – Did you see #137 – Chicken fucker!

you guys are such idiots…like seriously…PARIS ROCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
stop dissing her,shes done a hell lot more than u retards sitting here staring at her coz youve never touched a chick before.

at least she TRIES to sing.

anyway….about the video…i thought that video was very sweet. nice! and i only signed up to say that i like Paris and that vid. shes awesome,go P!

Thanks LittleWatson so the 411, I like to think of myself as a total gossip whore, but the herpe thing slipped right by me!!!!

Thanks LittleWatson for the 411, I like to think of myself as a total gossip whore, but the herpe thing slipped right by me!!!!

Easy there #168. Calm yourself down tigre; easier to ask the question on this site than click away on Google and further non-informative sites. Maybe getting to the gym more would lessen your hostility Mamacita. Adios amiga

@174

So wait. You said it’s “easier to ask the question on this site than click away on Google” and yet I am the one who needs to go to the gym? You’re lame. Anyway, I like my hostility.

YIKES!

Hef is getting a preview of when he is sent to Hell for being a dirty old man.

As for Paris, Good Lord!! Would this c**t-bag just please go away. She is ridiculous. She has vast resources of money and status and doesn’t use a single ounce of it to benefit the world in any way.

We’re sick of her bleached out hair extentions, her “that’s hot”, her Pirates Of The Carribean themed slashed up outfit things, her thinking that she is sexy but she is just losery, her being rich = being important attitude, and her belief that she is some wild, crazy, bad-ass, out-there, rebel chick, when everything she does in her sex tape, most people do before breakfast.

Get in touch with reality woman! You’re a moron. You’ve had your 15 minutes of fame. You need to move over so the next slut-du jour can have her drawn-out moment in the spotlight.

Yup, it was easier to get your reply than google it (geez tho you’re so right about that clever search engine thing). Glad you’re comfy with hostility. BTW, have been to the gym and am not lame at all, just more chilled than you.

Funny thing is, she is in her early 20′s and currently has more sexually transmitted diseases than he does.

I dont know whether she sounds British or like she’s gagging!! Why is she singing with a pretend British accent???
What makes it really sad and disturbing is that she probably actually thinks its really hot and that she was totally channelling Marilyn Monroe right then!!
Dirty skank! She makes Christina tryin to be Marilyn look classy! And when the f**k did we think that would happen?

I was very sorry

For being a skinny ho, she has quite a belly, it looks like she has a treasure trail.

@29
good one!!!
oh yeah, and did she forget to sing
“happy beeethdeah….mr hefner…..and i have herpes too!” ???
heehee now my day is complete!!!
ugh, i heard she got booed off the stage in 2004 when she tried to sing something she entitled “Paris is Burning” …..rrrriiiggghhhtt…. funny how its ALWAYAS all about HER?? (PES) ;)!!!

PS 77— that was a good one!! i think you said it all right there!

since when does the ability to put on underwear give you license to sing in public???

notice the pause with the stupid, i suppose she thought it was coy, smile as she tries to remember who she’s singing to…..syphillis screws with your short term memory.

wtf – that was horrible and embarassing and uncomfortable to even watch.
And yeah, she’s a bone-rack but she has a beer gut. Nice.

Paris Hilton should be banned from doing anything that requires remote talent. She should stick to making sex tapes and leave it at that.

Instead she believes she’s actually more than a 15 year olds fantasy and shallow high school girls idol and acknowledges herself as a natural born icon.

What was the “eh” crap beetween the words of the song? I’m sure Hefner nailed better girls than Paris on his worst day.

#186 – She shouldnt make sex tapes either, even that was boring!!!

IMPLANTS

IMPLANTS

Man i was dying of laughter i can actually hear crickets in the back ground going wtf was that gotdam look honey no applause. After watching her performance man i can’t wait for her new album Suck you off now that’s hot!! lol oh one more thing she’s doing a hip hop reggeaton album this album is going to be going be hard forget ashanti and olivia her cums Paris!! lol

Is she really going to make a cd? By the way, here’s a puzzling question for *EVERYONE* If she’s a billionaire, how come she can’t either become a pop star or a singer? doesn’t money makes you automatically talented?

*Hollywood just can’t pull it off, your eaither a washed up whore or your playing the role of an innocent washed up whore. C’mon guys, Theirs no such thing as our DREAM innocent look, and hidden whore in the world.

*either*

Hey, I actually LIKE Paris Hilton! She’s a smart, business-saavy, respectable young lady, and…

Aww, hell, who am I kidding. She’s just a disease-ridden whore. Which is good. Hopefully the STD’s have so thoroughly destroyed her uterus that she’ll never be able to conceive. Who ever thought that we’d be grateful for herpes??

omg. that was hideous. why is paris hilton famous? oh yes, thats right. because if anyone dared dispute her ‘talent’ theyd be attacked with the hundred billion people shes slept with and her teeny bopper worshippers. stds are a powerful weapon against innocent people like us who have to endure whorey ‘multi talented’ people with weird noses. i feel sorry for marylin monroe. now a skank with a voice thats been attacked by gonorrhea or something is trying to copy her. what has the world come to?

It’s revealing that the comment posters “got a good reason for taking the easy way out” in piling on La Hilton only – while saving the vulgarian patriarch who made the whole occasion possible for a few parenthetical asides about his being too old for the skank “lifestyle” he incarnates, as though he were any less a male Paris-Hilton-in-spirit *avant la lettre* from the moment (and well before that, no doubt, in spirit) he launched his empire at the outset of the Eisenhower interregnum…he does deserve credit, though, in affording one prominent occasion among thousands for many of us to travel Beyond Libertarianism over the years, as we found ourselves unable to remain agnostics in the cultural and ethical spheres toward those dime-store Diderots whose formal liberties in the market and in the courtroom we found ourselves defending while hoping, post-adjournment, that our sisters would grow up not to be Hiltons – or our brothers Hefners…

I loved it. Its so, Kitch! It will make history! Bob Frassinetti