Victoria Beckham looks like a Nazi – literally

September 26th, 2007 // 114 Comments

Victoria Beckham decided it’d be cool to dress like a Nazi as she flew from LA to Japan. Some say she’s basing her look on Tom Cruise’s new role as a Nazi colonel. Victoria and Tom’s wife Katie Holmes are close friends. So close, that Katie is coaching Posh Spice’s career that can’t seem to take off. A source close to Victoria spoke to the The Daily Mail:

“Katie Holmes had been helping her with scripts and perfecting her acting but even that has not helped the situation. Victoria had hoped to be picking and choosing presenting roles too. She had wanted perhaps to guest host on Larry King – in the way that Heather Mills did. But that has not worked out either. She had been hoping that the documentary about the Beckhams moving to America would be made into a series, but it was cut right back too. Victoria had also set her sights on getting the cover of American Vogue but that too has proved elusive. Basically she pinned her hopes on offers of work coming flooding in but that just has not happened.”

Victoria Beckham is making all the right moves. First she seeks advice from Katie Holmes whose career was quietly murdered in its sleep by Tom Cruise – right after he stole Katie’s looks. Then Victoria dresses like a Nazi in public. Smart, smart move. She’s on her way to being the hardest working woman in Hollywood. Posh’s publicist must be the best in the biz. Or a ham sandwich. I can’t decide.


  1. missj

    she looks like an idiot

  2. steve

    let’s send her off to israel dressed like that and see how long she lasts.

    i hate this bitch.

  3. that hat really accentuates her giant pig nose

  4. jrzmommy

    She’s lucky there aren’t any powerful Jews in Hollywood.

  5. adeliza

    My God!!!

    The pig fetus bitch it back! She will never make it here. We have enough ass wipes and fuck offs from this country to contend with.

    We don’t need an import.

    God Dang that outfit is heinous.

  6. jrzmommy

    Himler Chic.

  7. PunkA

    Posh really is a train wreck. She is not Hollywood glam, but comes across as Eurotrash. She may be it in London, but the Brits aren’t known for producing beaties typically.

  8. Sid

    I think Tom should play Ace, and Zac Efron should play Gary.

  9. Love the glasses. They really accentuate her nose.

  10. why not now?

    Jim Gaffigan does an excellent comedic rip on american vs. british beauty.
    He says, “Ever watch the BBC? You find yourself thinking, ‘Where’d they get all these friggin ugly people? These are the people that actually got the acting jobs?”

    This woman must be euthanized. Looks like she already supports genetic cleansing.

  11. oven fresh

    She’s studying Method acting, so I’m pretty sure that hat is made out of her former lawyer’s skin.

  12. My God, she tries so hard, doesn’t she?

  13. Guy

    This was funnier on yesterday

  14. bumbo

    I hate the bitch too.

  15. Doll

    I just checked the Celebslam page. No, it wasn’t funnier. Not even close.

  16. bumbo

    She’s so ugly and so pricky.

  17. Hemlock Queen

    You know, when those trash mags poll people if they would follow VB’s fashion advice, and they say yes… I just want to know, who ARE those people?

  18. #12 Tries so hard? She reall doesn’t do anything. She just shows up.

    I wish she WOULD try harder. Try harder to stop irritating me. Or try harder at a suicide attempt.

  19. poop chute

    she doesn’t look like a nazi; she looks like a concentration camp victim wearing a nazi uniform.

  20. Baking a Kike

    Tom absolutely loved wearing those pants. He said he could fit an entire colony of gerbils in them.

  21. z

    Man she’s gross looking. Too skinny, blech

  22. Pete

    She lacks Sarah Jessica Parker’s “unconventional beauty.” Which is a little weird, because there are lots of pictures of Nazis on horses.

  23. my comment

    She has the face of an unborn pig.
    So she looks natural as a Nazi.

  24. If they are going to show a picture of Victoria Beckham, would the Fish please pick one with lots of cleavage? Something to keep my eyes from looking at here face

  25. veromango

    She should just keep shopping and let her broken piece of man meat make all of the money.

  26. mango

    The problem is that she skipped the first step: “have talent.”

  27. veggi

    I bet her head is the same size at britney’s china hole.

  28. veggi

    Jimbo, cmon now, we all know you want some cleavage to help you tear your eyes away from Tom’s bulge!

  29. veggi

    I’m Slim Shady, yes, I’m the real Shady
    all you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
    so wont the real Slim Shady please stand up, please stand up, please stand up

  30. to japan with this retarded outfit??omg japanese gonna throw u with spoilt sashimi and toufu because you look like a trash bin!

  31. veggi

    28,29. aaaaaaaahahahahahaha! wait, no. that wasn’t even remotely funny.

  32. veggi

    Very funny, troll. You can try but you’ll never be able to match my personality. Now go make me a sammich!

  33. Zoey Lund

    “She’s on her way to being the hardest working woman in Hollywood.”

    I initially read that as “hardest LOOKING woman in Hollywood.” ANd agreed.

    Fairly certain her skin can deflect bullets.

  34. havoc

    I wonder if she’s into scat and ass play like Hitler?

    Enquiring minds want to know…..


  35. Pat

    “Victoria had also set her sights on getting the cover of American Vogue”

    …she’ll be in luck whenever they get to their special issue on “Monster Forehead Zits.”

  36. Veggi – Did you find that shirt?

  37. Bemused

    FYI: Tom Cruise is impersonating Colonel Claus von Stauffenberg, the German Army officer who was NOT a Nazi and was shot for attempting to assassinate Hitler in 1944.

  38. veggi

    Yeah, Jimbo, I did. It was up my ass, like your head. Back off, ya slobbering perv.

  39. Jersey Maegan

    Why are her toenails always so long? Or why is her big toenail always so long? And why does she always wear stripper shoes, just because they are designer doesnt mean they are cute. She’s gross. Figures she would move to LA along with the rest of the gross weirdos.

  40. miggs

    Tom took the part because he thought anything involving attempts to ass-ass-in-ate would be right up his alley.

  41. veggi

    Hey jimbo. No, haven’t looked yet……. but I will!

    and really, troll, don’t steal my sammich maker line. It’s a bit off puttin for a retard like yourself……try a new name. I

  42. @38 Fuck You troll!

  43. Sue

    And here I thought he was impersonating Colonel Klink…

  44. veggi

    Try this one: go masturbate with a cucumber. See? It combines two of my passions.

  45. Fuck Them

    I can see her getting a movie roll soon .Producer Mel Gibson

  46. lambman

    perhaps she should have married somebody who plays a sport Americans actually give a fuck about if she wants to make it in Hollywood….even that right wing nut job Elizabeth on The View was smart enough to marry a football player to get into the entertainment bizz.

  47. dog, interrupted

    Yeah, she should have married Michael Vick.

  48. Kate

    Tom said it was his “tastiest” role ever. The director said if he closed his eyes sometimes he could make himself believe it was a woman’s mouth.

  49. @44 Hey troll do you fantasy that the cucumber is your brother? He uses to rock your world didn’t he???

  50. I’m sorry to go and on about your brother, it’s just that…I don’t know, your description of him was so vivid. He sounded so…virile. It’s so easy to envision the big swollen vein leading up the underside of his throbbing co—- um, I gotta go

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