Victoria Beckham Steps Out in Nippy Weather

Fashion and cosmetics mogul Victoria Beckham stepped out in NYC yesterday in a turtleneck titty toga, much to the chagrin of skeezers on the Internet (because you can make out the contours of her breast-o’s). I don’t know what Posh Spice is up to these days beyond making bajubles of money selling expensive concealers and eyeliner, but whatever she’s doing she sure has some interesting company… WHAT on God’s brown, polluted Earth that creature walking behind her is, I have no idea.

He kind of looks like a mix between Mickey Rourke and Angela Lansbury, but could very well be the fashion world’s missing link. Someone who actually knows designers might be quick to tell me, “how can you not recognize renown fashion designer Jacque Poutine!” But I don’t care who he is, I’m just jealous that he gets smell Victoria Beckham’s farts in an SUV and I don’t…