Victoria Beckham Wants to Murder Jennifer Lopez

May 24th, 2011 // 130 Comments

Yesterday, American Idol creator Simon Fuller received a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame and, naturally, invited Victoria Beckham because he also manages the Spice Girls. Except she decided to show up late only to find current Idol host Jennifer Lopez had taken the front row seats leaving Posh to sit in the third row where she spent the entire ceremony shooting pure looks of icy murder that not even Randy Jackson was safe from. Which is pretty impressive considering Victoria Beckham only has one expression, yet there she is firing goddamn laser eyes in every shot. Apparently the 1/100th of a centimeter she managed to furrow her brow makes all the difference. It probably sounded like someone popping bubble wrap every time she squinted. “Take *pop* my seat *pop* will you *pop* bloody wide-ass trollop *pop* pew pew *pop* pew pew pew!”

Photos: Getty, Fame, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

superficial

  1. rather seen baby spice there, she had a lovely, meaty bum

  2. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    jack-eyyy
    Commented on this photo:

    I thought that guy was Val Kilmer with a new weave. my bad.

  3. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    jack-eyyy
    Commented on this photo:

    “If I concentrate hard enough with my British Ice Queen powers maybe I can get her to impersonate that nazi chick that Jesse James banged. Bwahahahahahaha “

  4. Eclipse

    I love that J-Lo’s ass covers the whole damn shot when she’s standing up. I wish she’d warn everyone before blotting out the sun.

  5. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    Queequeg
    Commented on this photo:

    Why shouldn’t she sit in first row?

    She’s the world’s most beautiful woman.

    Isn’t she??

  6. HC66

    If she keeps making that face she’s going to turn into Maria Shriver.

  7. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    horfdorf
    Commented on this photo:

    louder manchild! who’s the fairest one of all?!

  8. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    Laurita
    Commented on this photo:

    I caught ya Randy Jackson!

  9. Colin

    “Jennifer Lopez had taken the front row seats” Plural. Posh is just mad because J.Lo’s enormous badonk was taking up her seat, too. Although, to be fair, she could have easily slithered in there somewhere, but then the paparazzi wouldn’t be able to see her past all the ass.

  10. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    Colin
    Commented on this photo:

    OH GOD IT’S LOOKING RIGHT AT US!

  11. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    Colin
    Commented on this photo:

    Remind me why she wasn’t Scary Spice again?

  12. It starts with an icy stare, followed by name calling. Next, it’s onto hair pulling. Then the claws come out, meow, and it’s a full-on level 7 cat fight, that finds itself devolving into slow, fluttery kisses. Finally, it hits its crescendo with an intense, tongue-laden make-out session, followed by hot girl-girl action.

  13. Ever since botox, I can’t figure out who’s pissed at who.

  14. Spice Girl Vs. Spicy bean fart.

  15. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    castallare
    Commented on this photo:

    Are you sure she’s not just melting? She is in broad daylight without any protection…

  16. 750-Hicks

    So, some fucking not unwise thingy going on? Well, I don’t really think so, that sounds really highly situation going on there.

  17. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    750-Hicks
    Commented on this photo:

    J-Lo actually looks pretty good, well-fitted dress.

  18. Jamie Lynn's Uterus

    I hope Posh succeeds and murders JHO!

  19. Kevin

    What Posh needs to murder is a sandwich

  20. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    upyours
    Commented on this photo:

    Does my husband make me look fat in this?

  21. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    upyours
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks fucking possessed, like she wants to suck that kids brain out through his tounge.

  22. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    Ace of Spades
    Commented on this photo:

    Seriously, isn’t she supposed to be pregnant? Very pregnant by now? You can’t just Atkins that thing away ya know. Oh wait, maybe the baby is hiding in her boobs. Those seem to be the only things that have gotten big.

  23. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    Ace of Spades
    Commented on this photo:

    What’s Maria Shriver doing there?!

  24. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    Ace of Spades
    Commented on this photo:

    Just smile through the pain.

  25. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    Jovy
    Commented on this photo:

    Babe, there’s a pregnant reptilian behind you and I think it’s hungry, don’t look it in the eyes. I said DON’T LOOK.

  26. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    Teena
    Commented on this photo:

    And Keira from the Dark Crystal resurfaces…

  27. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    DogBoy
    Commented on this photo:

    Love the fact that Randy is checkin out dat ass.

  28. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    fire
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s hilarious! Why does she never smile? :( How depressing. Now that I think of it, she never smiled back in her Spice Girl’s “Spice World” days, either. She looks SO much better with longer brown hair, than her short blond choppy hair.

    Having said that…What the hell happened to her over the years!? and her attempt at a smile…It reminded me of a demon child of Freddy Kreuger…..Scary stuff!!

  29. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    DogBoy
    Commented on this photo:

    Posh sucks the lifeblood out of a small boy with her feeding spike.

  30. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    DogBoy
    Commented on this photo:

    burn victim. sad.

  31. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    skye
    Commented on this photo:

    “pssst. imma put my……um….penis? in your….uh….that place you keep trying to make me touch. ok? yeah. yeeaaahhh. you like that? you like that.”

  32. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    Ella
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s the most physical affection his mother has ever shown him – pull away pull away!

  33. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    skye
    Commented on this photo:

    ‘i keep getting the oddest feeling. ya know? like death is near. do you feel that? wait, is this the rapture?! dammit! i wanted to wear a better dress. i hate you marc. i fuking hate you.”

  34. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    fapappy
    Commented on this photo:

    Well it’s like they say. Out with the old, and in with the old.

  35. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    Ness
    Commented on this photo:

    I thought Falkor was a good dragon

  36. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    991-Gannon Mattolli
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t think this wicked witch of the west do some unexpected with J-Lo. That ends up bad situation.

  37. Victoria Beckham

    “Urge to kill…..RISING!”

  38. Yeah

    Don’t we all?

  39. bb

    Too much plastic surgery and to few meals…She looks like a starving plastic cat

  40. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    Ires
    Commented on this photo:

    GOOO Jennifer!!! Stay yourself and stay beautifullllll!!! :D

    Victoria is just a jealous woman, full of hate and no warm heart.
    The reason why she’s never smiling is in line with her inside.
    I quess she’s a woman who likes to gossip about other people without pointing any finger towards herself.

    Go and get a tan Victoria Ugly!!

  41. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    Peaches
    Commented on this photo:

    woah, victoria loooks like shiiit!

  42. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    Cathazat
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh please. She’s pregnant. Let her have her bitch-hormonal-moment. But when DOES she look like she’s not shooting daggers at people? She has to be one of the most unattractive women on the planet. Well, next to Jennifer Anniston.

  43. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    seals
    Commented on this photo:

    Jennifer Lopez, you fat cow. Get out of Victoria’s seat before you break it.

  44. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    seals
    Commented on this photo:

    Her spanx must be made out of chain mail.

  45. JFlo

    It’s skeletor looking at She-Ra…by the Power of Greyskuuuuulllll

  46. kiba

    Envy hurts – and it hurts you……stop judging people losers!!! and get a life!

  47. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    healthybeautifulblog.blogspot.com
    Commented on this photo:

    JLo and Posh Spice wear quiet similar shoes. Isn’t that sky-high heels seem dangerous for her, especially that she is now pregnant?

  48. Laura

    What an immature thing to do…

  49. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    Linda
    Commented on this photo:

    I do not think Victoria Beckham is the least bit attractive. She always looks mean and harsh and next to Jennifer Lopez she is downright ugly!

  50. Victoria Beckham Jennifer Lopez JLo Simon Fuller Star
    rachel
    Commented on this photo:

    does JLo have braces?

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