Vanessa Minnillo in a Bikini

And by more important business, I meant this. Specifically this.

In related news, stock prices for Boones Farm and cookie dough skyrocketed today as the market reacted to Jessica Simpson’s documented penchant for eating when she’s sad. Consequently, fudge prices continued to hold despite early forecasts suggesting an upswing that would precede a short burst in puppy purchases.

This just in… representatives for McDonald’s are preparing to make a statement confirming a McRib outage is now “inescapably imminent.” Pandemonium is expected.

Photos: Splash News