V. Stiviano Allegedly Beaten, Called A ‘N*gger’ By Attackers In New York

June 2nd, 2014 // 25 Comments
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According to her lawyer which immediately makes all of this sound extremely credible, V. Stiviano was allegedly attacked by a group of assailants in New York last night who apparently called her a nigger. Outside of the theory that she made all of this up because she never went to police but did, however, start firing off press releases to anyone desperate enough for pageviews (Hi.), that leaves us with three possible explanations: 1. Donald Sterling did this with his money because Magic Johnson has AIDS. 2. Racism still is a serious, violent problem in America. Or 3. “The Nightmare Scenario,” 15-year-old Justin Bieber has a TARDIS and we’re all good as dead. *slices open Photo Boy* And I thought he smelled bad – *catches breath* – on the outside. *crawls inside to wait out Armageddon*

Photo: Getty

superficial

  1. RockCocket

    Maybe they were yelling ‘Gold-digger’ and she only caught the last 2 syllables?

  2. Mitch

    She has as much credibility as a politician.

    PR stunt, plain and simple.

  3. Frank Burns

    That will teach her to make fun of Justin Beiber’s music to his face. Thug life!

  4. Fuck Bieber

    I dunno what she is… other than really disgusting.

  5. I heard the beating she took wasn’t even close to the beating she took with the ugly stick.

  6. anonymous

    Racism has never gone away. It only becomes news these days if the very rich are caught doing it.

  7. V Stiviano Braless Nipples
    Commented on this photo:

    So, erotic spot-welding is a thing now?

  8. I’m guessing her jizz-shield wasn’t getting her enough press.

  9. What was the least dignified experience for her, getten punched in the face or fucking Don Sterling?

  10. But with the blast shield down, she can’t even see! How is she supposed to fuck?

    • Dox

      “Your eyes can deceive you. Don’t trust them. Stretch out with your Vajayjay,….”

      At least, I think that’s how that line went…..

  11. Bane

    It’s looking like the Thai lady boy is scrambling for that last five minutes she has left.

    Next stop. Reality show.

  12. No, no, she’s not a n***er. Not at all. As Bane says, she’s Thai.
    So, kick boxing and full face sun visors are her culture.
    Also, rich white men.

  13. I’m not sure how Los Angeles county law works in the state of New York, but one thing is a certain outcome in all of this: Lindsay Lohan will walk free damn it.

  14. j/k

    Yall shoulda never put that bitch on TV. Just like Tila Tequila and herpes you can’t get rid of her.

  15. We’re all missing out of the most important thing to come out of this post.

    Photo Boy is a Tauntaun.

  16. anonym

    she is ugly as fuck. Those cheekbones look alien.

  17. anonym

    I’m sure she looks better after the beating

  18. eh

    Wow, the whole time, Sterling was trying to save her. He’s like Jesus.

  19. This woman is desperate and useless. Go away and never come back.

  20. DarkwingDuck

    First and only comment I’m ever going to leave on this site but after the CNN story which credits multiple eyewitnesses who are in no way linked to her and an arrest you pretty much need to fall on your own sword and make a non-shitty mea culpa for this abomination of a post.

  21. V Stiviano Braless Nipples
    derps
    Commented on this photo:

    what a fucking idiot

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