Tyra Banks craps herself

February 13th, 2008 // 147 Comments

Okay, I don’t know whether this shit (Hi-yo!) is true, but the buzz is model/diva Tyra Banks crapped her pants during Fashion Week in New York. Here’s the horribly written first-hand account from magazine blogger Fabian Basabe. Then again, if I witnessed a Tyra bowel movement, I’d probably have trouble effectively communicating and maintaining consciousness:

I was asked to film an interview for a new project but being busy reporting the massacre it is during fashion week for paper magazine – by far my favorite assignment – I had to squeeze the interview in between shows and, in order to have it easy for everyone, i arranged to do it backstage at the tents in the w suite. Just when I start getting comfortable and ready, a group of madmen and madwomen storm in and take possession of the suite because… ready?… Tyra Banks messed herself and needed to change. Now, let’s break this down: messing oneself should not happen if you are older that 5 or younger than 90. if it happens and in fact you are older than 5 or younger that 90, then it should be one, single, very unfortunate episode which will bound you to be made fun of forever and you can’t complain about it. Now I would like to bring to your attention that Tyra’s people carried a change of clothes for her at NYC fashion week. Hmmmh… could it be that Tyra messed herself before? or just that her entourage is so organized that in case tyra would ever, maybe, possibly mess herself that one time, they have a change of clothes? I don’t know… but all these thoughts were twirling in my mind when in horror I was watching such an abomination, feeling so alone in the world. Meanwhile, everyone is looking at me, to see if i was going to throw a fit because i now have a production crew and no place to shoot. Excuse me please, the suite is great but i think I’m gonna go, you know…

Could Tyra Banks be a serial pants-pooper? I’ve always sort of suspected but never really had the journalistic integrity to voice such a theory. What’s most surprising is that Janice Dickinson isn’t running naked through the streets proclaiming to the world that Tyra shit herself. I figured she’d be all over this and even take out a billboard in Times Square. I’m sure it would read something classy like, “Hey, Tyra, I’m 90 and I don’t need Depends. Love, Janice. P.S. Lose weight.” Ah, the bonds of sisterhood.

Photos: Getty Images
superficial

  1. 1 MILF Hunter

    Maybe she sharted herself. Tried to sneak a lady-like fart and got more than she bargained for.

  2. deaconjones

    I have once crapped my pants you douche bag. It’s not a big deal. You scoop it out with your hand and go on.

    FRIST you smiling cunts.

  3. Gerald_Tarrant

    Please STFU about this now Fergnauster. Thanks.

  4. Snarf

    Finally!

    Thanks Superficial!

    By the way, Tyra also threatened to sue a Cancer Patient last week! What a fucking fat pants-shitting bitch!!!

  5. Kirbykidx

    Wow. I knew she was insane, but Jesus.

    You aren’t frist deaconjones, I am.

  6. Tits McCholo

    that fabian bitch was on the trust fund kids reality show, and man, he is a worse pansy than the discharge from my vagina. Delicious!

  7. deaonjones

    I’d eat that poop out of her pants. I love big women.

    @5 fuck you

  8. beep

    Those models take lots of laxatives to keep skinny…it wouldn’t surprise me if she was taking more in the days before the event in a neurotic effort to look extra good. Somebody must have snuck up behind and goosed her – voila, liquid poo projectile.

  9. Fonzenoon

    Someone needs to shit on her!

  10. wyland

    This fat bitch still poses like she is a model or something.

  11. Aerialgreen

    So it finally happened, Tyra’s crap overloaded to a exploding point.

  12. deaconjones

    fuck you all. You are all assholes. Tyra had an accident. That is IT!

  13. will

    Ok why the fuck can’t anyone say FIRST instead of FRIST…

  14. Fabian Basabe is definitely acting quite high and mighty. I have let out many wet farts in my lifetime and have come to one conclusion; Never get too attached to any pair of underwear. Doo doo happens

  15. She might be taking that stuff alli that causes your ass to leak when you eat greasy food.

  16. #2

    I’ll drop a hot lunch on her…….MMMMM!

  17. Guy

    The title of this post should be ‘Tyra Banks gives birth’

  18. Judd

    Its probably from too much ass sex…if you get stuck in the ass too many times, I’m sure it just sneaks out every now and then!!! I’d hate-fuck her in the ass too!!!

  19. K-Swan

    Tyra has IBS. That’s a well-known fact. So perhaps the stress made her bowels irratable at fashion week.
    Sometimes shit like this happens. How embarrassing, though. Poor woman.

  20. Walter

    She is probably taking the Allie diet pill. It can do that to you.

  21. Walter

    She is probably taking the Allie diet pill. It can do that to you.

  22. deaonjones

    @19. You would know!

  23. D. Richards (Nauseous.)

    This is the begining of the apocalypse. I am horrified thinking of the smell.

    Anyway, look, Tyra just has a loose ass. It’s simple. That, tripled with the laxatives she uses to try and help her lose those ugly, blubbery hips, and the undercooked chicken gumbo she had for lunch, made for an incredible mess.

    Tyra’s servants are very loyal.

  24. IKE

    I bet she’s taking a diet supplement with ORLISTAT as an ingredient. It could give you ‘uncontrollable diarrhea’ and flatulence.
    Just curious….is there a “controllable” version of diarrhea?
    lol
    Shits is shits, right?
    :)

  25. hurang

    Man a fat, loud mouthed bitch who thinks she is hot, and she shits her pants???

    TYRA BANKS SUCKS!!!

  26. Racer X

    This story stinks!

  27. Thanks for the spandex pictures with the “Tyra shit her pants” story.

    **puking**

  28. Poopypants

    who else is she going to shit?

  29. Robert Mosler

    Since she knows that she is a fatty, I assume that she is taking either Alli or a ton of laxatives… and from hearing the news, that stuff happens a lot. It probably has happened before, and that is why she has the change of clothes.

  30. Tony

    It seems incredibly more likely that she just spilled something on herself. I mean, wouldn’t it be worth not having a dress with wine or whatever all over it if you’re going to appear at these things?

  31. tanya

    It’s all the laxatives she’s been popping to loose weight.

    Dia reeeeee ahhhhh

  32. D. Richards (Louse.)

    I’m not sure if I should bring this up right now, but Frist shit her vagina once.

  33. Rachel

    OK, so I do see that other people thought of this, but maybe she is taking a diet pill of some sort? Like Alli, which can cause some sort of oily anal leakage?
    I had a friend, who was actually obese and therefore actually had a real reason to try diet pills, who had to stop taking his diet pills because of constant anal leakage. Now, I’m not saying she should be taking these things, but I have a bit of sympathy for her if this is why it occured.

  34. youmama

    when you’re sliding into first and you feel a little burst……………………………

  35. Jenny

    Tyra has IBS? You mean Insane Black Shithead? Yeah I knew about that.

  36. Anonymous

    D. Richards,

    Seriously, dude, give up the comedy. You’re not good at it. You try, but you always fail. Try driving a truck, I think that may be more your speed.

  37. Jess

    She probably ate one of the losing contestants on ANTM. Bags of bones don’t digest well.

  38. lys

    I’m on Alli and it definitely has caused some embarrassing moments. What is a girl to do when she is at work and she has crapped her pants? I am not lucky enough to have an entourage to sweep me away and change my diaper. I do sympathize with Tyra some, but I don’t have anybody to scrub the shit stains off my panties

  39. deaconjones

    @39. I would

  40. my comment

    Unchecked, her weight could reach whale-like proportions. So keep taking those diet pills Tyra, we don’t mind a little *spillage* here and there. It’s worth it.

  41. lipper

    I swear I see the outline of a cock on her right leg. Seriously, its creeping my ass out! Tranny Tyra? That would explain SOO much.

  42. FCS

    Your supposed to drop the Cosby kids off at the POOL Tyra.

    Not the pants.

  43. Katrina

    I’ll bet she’s taking that diet pill Alli. One of the side effects is leakage from the rear. Seriously.

  44. noone much

    My suspicion would be serial abuse of laxatives to try and keep her figure. Classy!

  45. D. Richards (Surgeon.)

    #37. Please. I have more comedic talent in my testicles than your poor father did when he created you, and your siblings.

    Wait, I take that back; I’m know your mother is a downtrodden flapper and any man that can keep a straight face while fucking a midget obviously has great a sense-of humor.

  46. deaconjones

    @2 and 8

    Alright people, it’s pretty obvious to me that the fat cunt “iwish”is trolling me again, I think she secretly wants my cock, but she cant have it cuz she’s a quivering sack of fat cells

    that said, Tyra probably shit herself from all the laxatives she’s eating so she can lose the thunder thighs that she’s “proud off”

    Id still titty fuck her though….

  47. Pixie

    Well to be fair to Tyra, there has been a lot of nasty stuff going around, she might have had diarrhea. Shit happens you know :-)

  48. deaconjones

    @47. Shut up troll. I am the REAL deaconjones!!!! And there is no way I’d titty fuck that huge fucking black wannabe sexstar. No way. Not with yours. Not with your dogs.

  49. TetraShiva

    I have no idea what all of you are talking about, crapping your pants doesn’t just happen. You have to put yourself in the position to make that happen. I don’t think I’ve ever crapped my pants past 8.

    Man, I am so cursed now, aren’t I?

Leave A Comment