(Oh, I’m sorry. Did that headline make you throw up in your mouth a little?)
“Actress” Tori Spelling, daughter of billionaire producer Aaron Spelling, and her filthy non-billionaire husband Charlie Shanian have reportedly split after a year of marriage.
From what I understand, it seems pretty clear that every time Spelling’s husband looked at her, he saw a giant talking bag of money. So I’m going to go ahead and assume that he’s finally become suspicious of how a bag of money could drink so much booze and have given him herpes. Because last I checked, money should buy happiness, not cold sores on your man-junk.
Sydney | September 19, 2005 at 2:12 pm
Well I’m not suprised, who’d stay with her for any amount of money.
Or maybe someone would.
But who am I to judge?
Stacylynnrs | September 19, 2005 at 2:12 pm
I want my gravy bowl back!!!
Sydney | September 19, 2005 at 2:12 pm
Ooo. Yay, first comment, how awesome.
Xibalba | September 19, 2005 at 2:16 pm
*quote*Because last I checked, money should buy happiness, not cold sores on your man-junk.*/quote*
I guess it depends on what you spend your money on… I get cold sores on my mangina all the time… Thanks mom, i want my $50 back!
usuckbananas | September 19, 2005 at 2:25 pm
What a nasty whore.
Gophergutz | September 19, 2005 at 2:29 pm
Guess there’s not much difference between moneybags and dirtbags when you get right down to it.
Clance-man | September 19, 2005 at 3:07 pm
If it wasn’t for daddy’s money and a buttload of plastic surgery, no one would go near her. Personally, I think she was orginally a dude. I wouldn’t touch her with your man-junk!
gracieo | September 19, 2005 at 4:05 pm
maybe k-fed is interested?
goldilocks | September 19, 2005 at 4:14 pm
Who even is tori spelling? i swear no-one in the UK has heard of her. and by no-one, i mean me.
K-dawg | September 19, 2005 at 4:27 pm
She is the worst actress we have and what we would call the first Paris Hilton. The only reason she is in movies or anything is because her dad is a producer genius and filthy rich. Tori is just filthy.
WTFweretheythinking? | September 19, 2005 at 4:31 pm
Thanks, I needed to throw up today.
seminole | September 19, 2005 at 5:48 pm
well I’m sure there are lots of guys out there looking for a girl with a face like a horse, or a border collie.
sugarplum | September 19, 2005 at 7:35 pm
It’s all well known, when a rich girl has neither good looks nor brains, there’s alcohol, the best pal she can get.
sparkydingle | September 19, 2005 at 7:38 pm
Jesus H. Christ that bitch is ugly. Has anyone told her? Someone find out her number and spring the news on her.
mac2048 | September 19, 2005 at 8:46 pm
My God. She is an ugly land-beast isn’t she?
A year is even too much. The poor fellow deserves a fortune in alimony just for waking up next to that face every morning.
maetl | September 20, 2005 at 7:23 am
she is creepy.
creepy like walking down a back alley late at night creepy.
Ms. Dilligaff | September 20, 2005 at 10:00 am
Aw, I was really hoping Horseface and some guy could be the one couple to make it work. Between her breakup and Renee’s breakup with some other guy, I feel empty inside.
stinkypinky | September 20, 2005 at 4:49 pm
I just don’t understand. If my Dad was as rich as hers I would have had complete reconstructive plastic surgery on my face a long time ago. She looks like a grasshopper.
jfive | September 20, 2005 at 7:35 pm
why cant she die like the rest of the 90210 cast?lol atleast i assume they all died lol or ended up on the sureal life
Lord Helmet | September 21, 2005 at 1:24 am
I’d fuck her and tell her to call me Brandon
Juliette | September 21, 2005 at 12:35 pm
She has had tons of plastic surgery- there is nothing real about her. I don’t know what was worse the before or the after.
debisis | September 22, 2005 at 12:01 am
wow. those are some pretty harsh comments. usually posts like these are from jealous assholes or ugly people.
i don’t think she’s gorgeous, but she looks like a woman and is at least cute. and you’re not. author.
debisis | September 22, 2005 at 12:07 am
http://www.freehomepages.com/celebzone13/ToriSpelling/tori6.jpg
ya know guys and ugly gals, i can admit that i slam baseball wives out of 99 percent jealousy.
mutterhals | September 23, 2005 at 4:10 pm
Tori Spelling is ugly as sin, this is true no matter what the poster looks like
Queen LaQueefah | September 26, 2005 at 4:14 pm
She’s funny looking and all that, but dude, what the hell is up with her lumpy boob? U ever notice that shit? It’s like her titty is unhooking from her chest
darylbn | May 10, 2007 at 12:00 am
Its’ all good even if you think it’s not. What I want to know is, can Tori safely operate common household apliances such as dish washers, toasters, chainsaws and backhoes?………