Jennifer Lopez & El Skeletor to remain married

December 29th, 2008 // 27 Comments

- Jennifer Lopez, despite rumors to the contrary, is not getting a divorce, according to her rep. Oh, well, if her rep says so, then it must be true. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to get one of these rep people to tell a child support judge I’ve been sterile my entire life. Infallible logic wins again! [E! Online]

- Jessica Simpson’s boyfriend Dallas quarterback Tony Romo collapsed in the shower after suffering a rib injury in yesterday’s game against the Eagles. At this time, I’d like to point out to Jessica Simpson that all my ribs are in working order. Just putting it out there on the off-chance she learned to read recently. Ha, who am I kidding? [ESPN]

- Chris Martin can apparently walk among us normal folks without being recognized. Seems no one knows who the Coldplay singer is despite the fact he bangs Gwyneth Paltrow. I’m failing to see the problem here. Does he want people to know he diddles a woman who’s one Pilates class away from looking from Madonna? I’d keep that on the down-low, Jim. It’s Chris? Okay, sure. [Page Six]

- Oprah Winfrey has been duped by another memoir writer. After raving over Holocaust survivor Herman Rosenblat’s novel Angel at the Fence about meeting his wife in a concentration camp, the story has been debunked and canceled by the publisher. Which is great, just great. Now who’s going to pitch my memoir Yes, Ladies, It’s That Big, Shoots Diamonds, Gives Back Rubs and Knows How to Maximize Deductions for the Tax Return You Deserve!? Sonofa…. [TMZ]

Photos: WENN
superficial

  1. THAT_GIRL_JENN

    +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

    IM A WORTHLESS SACK OF ASS VOMIT. I SAY RACIST SHIT SHIT CUZ IM JEALOUS, SOMEONE SHOULD STOMP THE MASS OF PIG SHIT I CALL MY
    BRAIN OUT OF MY RACIST FAT HEAD, I SHOULD DRINK BLEACH UNTIL I DIE FACE DOWN IN A SEPTIC TANK, IM A SAD, FAT, WORTHLESS WASTE OF
    HUMAN LIFE. DRUNK PRISONERS WOULDNT FUCK ME FOR $1,000,000,
    THE ONLY FUNNY THING I COULD WRITE WOULD BE A SUICIDE NOTE!

    ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

  2. friendlyfires

    J-Lo …. sing-lo
    J-Simp … less Romo
    P-trow … D-Vors-o
    Win-frO … Dodo

  3. mimi

    JLo is certainly looking worn and haggard these days sans the plastic surgery.
    She is through. Old. Her appeal is done for.

  4. Rev. Al Sharpton

    First thing, J-Lo and Latino Gay Boy can go puff on a big dick! Neither one of them mothafuckas got any talent to speak of anyway. Secondly….Tony Homo, the Cowboys, T.O., Jessica and any other mothafuckas that look like them can also go and inhale some dicks. Oh and Chris Martin must go and suck some dick just because I said so! And Oprah needs to hop on the treadmill and dump about 200 pounds…..and then go suck some dick!

  5. Dustin

    It’s actually “Angel at the Fence,” just so you know.

  6. gloria’s words: RYTHM IS GONNA GET YOU, jenn.
    ……………..BET?

  7. Notice

    The author of post #20 is clearly, beyond any reasonable doubt, obsessed with sucking cock. Perhaps someone will be kind and patient enough to provide said poster with an endless supply of cocks to suck. Then maybe the little asswipe won’t have time to post online and virtually stink the place up.

    With that said, hopefully JenLo and Skeletor will stay together and live unhappily everafter, fulfilling some monumental karma. I mean what could be worse than spending your years listening to some whiney, fit throwing, spoiled brat bitch and moan constantly? They deserve to be sentenced to life together.

  8. Frankly Freaky

    #15

    To the Artist formerly known as Randal:

    I think you’re creepier. Who would ever admit to being the dweeb Randal? You got some serious creepiness going on! Not to mention some unresolved issues with your mother. Lighten up and quit being so sensitive. Like any of this has meaning…

  9. 1127

    She looks terrific.

  10. Walkere

    would it be shocking if they divorced………….

  11. Tonya

    How awful that the Rosenblats lied about their story and that the publishers and movie makers fell for it. Boy in the Striped Pajamas, which was a great book and now movie, never pretended to be true. The Rosenblats, like Madoff, are harming the good Jewish name and it’s terrible.

    I read a New York Times article about Stan Lee and Neal Adams the comic book artists supporting another TRUE Holocaust love story. There was a beautiful young artist, Dina Gottliebova Babbitt, who painted Snow White and the Seven Dwarves on the children’s barracks at Auschwitz to cheer them up. Dina’s art became the reason she and her Mother survived Auschwitz.

    Painting the mural for the children caused Dina to be taken in front of Dr. Mengele, the Angel of Death. She thought she was going to be gassed, but bravely she stood up to Mengele and he decided to make her his portrait painter, saving herself and her mother from the gas chamber as long as she was doing painting for him.

    Dina’s story is true because some of the paintings she did for Mengele in Auschwitz survived the war and are at the Auschwitz Birkenau Museum. Also, the story of her painting the mural of Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs on the children’s barrack has been corroborated by many other Auschwitz prisoners, and of course her love and marriage to the animator of Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs the Disney movie after the war in Paris is also a fact.

    I wish Oprah would do a story about Dina and her art not about the Rosenblats who were pulling the wool over all our eyes.

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