Toni Braxton is Doing Playboy

January 5th, 2011 // 57 Comments

Toni Braxton recently filed for bankruptcy on account of being an insane $50 million in debt, so naturally there’s only one way for this story to end: Nudity. Here she is on Twitter last night rationalizing posing for Playboy:

- New Year, New opportunities. So I have been considering taking up Playboy’s offer to feature me on their cover this year. What you think?
- I would love to pose with Hugh Hefner though. He’s the sexiest guy I know over 30 ;-)
- Of course it will be tastefully done :-)
- There are NOT talking that kind of spread! No Susie!!!! Just a lil T and A. They have asked me about 3 times before.

While I enjoy a tale of pornography being a woman’s only option as much as the next degenerate, with $50 million in debt posing for Playboy is a Band-Aid at best in this situation. I mean, she’ll make what? Maybe half a mil? Steve Hirsch at Vivid is paying off houses, and that’s just for Octomom. He’d probably buy Toni Braxton an island and all she’d have to do is inevitably let the entire Internet see her do anal. I guess what I’m trying to say here is, there’s a solution to every problem if you put your mind to it. Share that with your kids.

Photos: Getty

superficial

  1. I will be happy to see her naked

  2. dp'd

    F this site. Nothing but pop-up ads anymore! I enjoy the posts but the excessive ads make me feel violated.

  3. SATAN

    About 10 years too late

  4. Turd Ferguson

    How the hell does anyone get $50M in debt?
    What a joke.

  5. Deacon Jones

    “UnnnBreak mYYYYY Boneeeeerr….
    Say you’ll Loovvve me againnnn”

  6. chesty

    I’ll still put my cream in her coffee

  7. Righteous, dude

    Sounds great. I love naked women.

  8. Mortimer Duke

    When all else fails, resort to doing Hoe Shit.

  9. Well she hasn’t done a record YEARS, so she must REALLY need the money. Love the dress…

  10. Rough of virtue

    Satan was never keen on keeping time, so Ill have to add 10 more to her being late…

  11. Yep, let Ron Jeremy dump a couple loads in your ass Toni and you will be debt free in no time. You Go Girl!

  12. brit

    She’s 43 years old. And why would I want to see her naked?

    • Richard McBeef

      It’s not about seeing braxton naked as this not a jack off type of porn. This is about the public humiliation and shame that comes with having to resort to porn because you aren’t willing to work like the rest of us… you know the common folk who didn’t make millions of dollars in the mid 90s and fritter it away.

    • Charlotte Corday

      Your 26 year old girlfriend has too many stretch marks.

  13. I’m going to buy tissue and lotion in anticipation! YAY!

  14. City of Hope? More like “Titty of Hope”.

  15. RoboZombie

    Jesus, what is wrong with that woman? it looks like she was put together by a stoned Dr. Frankenstein! Eyes are a mile apart, man-hands, big freaking balloon head and wonky tits. Yeah, I want to see THAT naked…just so long as it’s “tastefully done”.
    Hork!

    • Hank

      Absolutely. Very bad plastic surgery. She thought she was just going to be “refreshed” and instead she just looks weird. Hollywood hos are such effing idiots.

  16. If you’re not going to show the hatchet gash, don’t bother posing…….

    .

  17. ntlj

    Love, love love the dress.

  18. Tiffany and Debbie (Deborah) Gibson were relevant nude because they were teen stars that guys in the 80′s always wondered what their tits looked like. Toni Braxton has shown her tits already and like Havoc said, if there’s no snatch, WTF is the point. This would be a good investment for PB is it was 1997.

  19. Richard McBeef

    burger shots or GTFO.

  20. Diane

    Well, if she wants to appear nude anywhere, she’d better get some new breast implants because those are looking a little weird and lopsided.

  21. HeyNow

    She must have lost her money by investing in parenting classes for African-American males.

  22. Toni Braxton
    duckbutter
    Commented on this photo:

    Cause shes black, they target them because they are so bad with their finances.

    Someone call Al Sharpton!

  23. Cash

    And who is this bitch, exactly?

  24. JRS

    How does someone go $50M in debt? Hopefully she OD’s the night after posing for Playboy.

  25. Toni Braxton
    Lisa
    Commented on this photo:

    I hate wigs.

  26. abe vigoda's eyebrows

    She wore a rip-off version of the J Lo Versace Dress to the Grammy awards years ago. I think she is gorgeous,but reeks of desperation.

    ….and she is maybe 50 mil in debt? what an asshole.

  27. Ray Sist

    This would have been good news 10 years ago. It’s like Christina Hendricks 15 years from now agreeing to pose nude. Do it when you’re young and relevant. Not when your saggy and out. Then again, Playboy could airbrush Betty White into fappable material.

    • Mmmmmmmmmm Betty White ….

    • MollySchtuck

      Elle McPhearson is 46 – would you not like to see HER naked? Braxton still looks damn fit and her body is amazing. Agree with others though – how the hell do you get 50 million in debt?? Makes me feel better about my lousy 50 thousand debt!

  28. Toni Braxton
    I'm Obama and I approve
    Commented on this photo:

    About 15 years AFTER she was famous…but, better late than never, I guess.

    HOLLA!!

  29. Toni Braxton
    karl anglin
    Commented on this photo:

    While Toni Braxton is a great looking woman
    I do not think any Playboy appearance will
    get her out of the financial mess she is in.

  30. J-Dizzle

    DP’d… Get Firefox and install the Adblock Plus add-on. No more ads ever.

  31. Grimmer

    People should spend more time developing their character. Your character can grow, evolve and get better, help you become a more interesting person.
    The way you “look”, your “Coolness” or “Sex Appeal” all evaporate in time, and you are left with your personality encased in an old body. If all that personality can come up with is “ME, me, me!” You will find yourself alone and detested.
    And 50 mil in debt? Who gets to pick up the tab for this self-centered pathologically narcissistic freak? She’s living the dream on the backs of others.
    It’s criminal that celebrities have such a hold on our culture. They are malignant.

    • amy chicken sandwich

      Excellent post. Thinking beauty is everything is an American artform. I’m a victim of it as well. Vanity will be my downfall.

  32. mfb

    is she doing PLAYBOY playboy or MAXIM playboy?

  33. Ari Ola

    If she’s going to do a spread, I hope that’s the position of her legs – I love the colour pink!!!

  34. latam2012

    she might be 50 million in debt but I doubt she experiences debt like the rest of us. When she’s scrambling around for food stamps I’ll start caring.

  35. Big whoop. Being in Playboy now is like being in the Sport Illustrated Swimsuit edition. In fact, I think SI shows more skin than playboy now. Not a big deal. She won’t show clam and even if she did, who’d want to see it now? The only way Playboy becomes relevant again is if they go completely hard core with their photo shoots, or they get a real big scoop by having someone completely unimaginable to pose nude. Say someone like Hillary Clinton or Michelle Obama. That’d fuck everyone up.

    Or Betty White … Mmmmmmmmmm Betty White …. hahahahahaha

  36. Chris Brown

    You all are just HATERS. Toni Braxton is STILL FINE A** Hell. I would the first in line to buy it. Toni has Lupus. You all should pray for her instead of hate on her. Haters make the world go round.

  37. Chris Brown

    You all are just HATERS. Toni Braxton is STILL FINE A** Hell. I would be the first in line to buy it. Toni has Lupus. You all should pray for her instead of hate on her. Haters make the world go round.

  38. Shannon Jones

    She’s $50 million dollars in debt because she had a pre existing medical condition. She couldn’t quilify for Health Insurance. Also her son has autism. I can’t stand Hating A** B****** on this site. Toni still looking good.

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