Tomi Lahren Is Going To FOX News… Surprised?

Tomi Lahren has fulfilled the dark prophecy and secured a contributing gig at Fox News. The wannabe gun magazine model hasn’t stopped spewing her racist bullshit since being fired from Glenn Beck’s The Blaze a few months back; she’s been broadcasting her rants from the only studio that will let her fart freely atop a seat warmer… her sedan.

I was going to post her latest video from Tuesday, but fuck that. She doesn’t deserve the views. I’ll happily summarize though:

  1. Tomi is mad about the Berkley protests.
  2. Tomi found a video of three people protesting in an equally relevant place… University of Nebraska-Lincoln.
  3. Tomi used it as an example of triggered snowflakes killing free speech when campus police told some nazi-loving supremacists that they had to get a move on…
  4. Tomi still looks pretty hot without a lot of makeup.

The complex political phenomenon that is Tomi Lahren is simple… it’s sex. Conservatives who subscribe to her “white rednecks are the real victims” rhetoric want to bang her because she looks like an SMU sorority dropout who talks all learned n’ junk. On the other hand, the folks who recognize this woman as the racist, hypocritical fame-whore she is, the kind that will explode in her pants over Kaepernick taking a knee before turning around and defending free speech for white nationalists, want to hate-bang her like an ex-girlfriend who is bomb in bed but impossible to bring around your friends.

It’s all good though. I’m glad she got the job. She is the lady version of Bill O’Reilly and Fox needs the most stubborn, blindly conservative voice they can get to polish the tweet turds that get flushed into their newsroom every morning by Supreme Leader Covfefe.