To celebrate her first Mother’s Day, Tom Cruise has thrown down almost a thousand dollars on a bouquet of flowers for Katie Holmes.
Tom Cruise enjoys Mother’s Day
May 8th, 2006 // 70 Comments
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Fisher55 | May 8, 2006 at 2:58 pm
first, fuckers
BarbadoSlim | May 8, 2006 at 2:59 pm
What a sicko he’s even forging the baby’s signature on the card.
* I know it’s cheap, but I couldn’t help myself
Fisher55 | May 8, 2006 at 2:59 pm
first, but then i was censored
suzy | May 8, 2006 at 2:59 pm
well, he kind of blew the surprise.. mother’s day isn’t until NEXT sunday lol
jemfysh | May 8, 2006 at 3:01 pm
Why is there never any mention of Isabella & Connor these days (Nicole Kidman’s adoptees). Anyone would think this was Tom’s first child…
BarbadoSlim | May 8, 2006 at 3:12 pm
#5 you hit the nail right into the cocsucker’s skull. In his book, for all intents and purposes the adoptees already served their purpose: publicity.
Now they don’t matter, but, THOSE were his first children, Maverick’s an ass.
Agatha | May 8, 2006 at 3:12 pm
Has anyone actually seen pictures of Suri???
hurley | May 8, 2006 at 3:13 pm
maybe mother’s day is today on the scientologist calendar.
Grphdesi23 | May 8, 2006 at 3:14 pm
He also told Katie that the flowers were blessed by L. Ron Hubbard.
Jacq | May 8, 2006 at 3:16 pm
She won’t be able to see the flowers when she’s locked in the closet with no lights.
Not like she can see through the tears any of the rest of the time. Maybe Sherry can describe them to her.
BigJim | May 8, 2006 at 3:17 pm
Dear Tom:
So I see you got that whore you married a whole truckload of flowers for Mother’s Day. What the fuck did you get for me, the woman who squeezed you out of her bleeding twat, you cheap piece of shit?
I spent fifty-seven hours in labor to bring your cock-loving ass into this world and all I get is a fucking e-card and a coupon for a free scientology personality test? I thought you were supposed to be some kind of fucking millionaire!
Where’s my thousand bucks worth of roses? I’m so pissed that I’m tempted to post those pictures I have of you going down on Val Kilmer. You may have said you were confused about the name “Val” but everyone knows better now.
Love,
Mom
Jacq | May 8, 2006 at 3:17 pm
Maybe they’re meat tulips? Just kidding – GOD I love that name! :)
eatmyass_sherry-co | May 8, 2006 at 3:20 pm
Tom Cruise loves the cock.
Just a fact, I mean reminder…
BigJim | May 8, 2006 at 3:23 pm
Bastardize this, sherry-cunt:
Tom Cruise Loves The <============3
Fisher55 | May 8, 2006 at 3:23 pm
when did Tom start dating Sigourney Weaver?
Kenton | May 8, 2006 at 3:24 pm
Watch the David Letterman interview on thevelvethottub.com…
David: Being a star you must have an enormous staff… Dont you?
Tom: Huge.
Jacq | May 8, 2006 at 3:26 pm
He can celebrate the day, too. After all, he is one gay mother. Motherfucker!
saltpeanuts | May 8, 2006 at 3:28 pm
I have the scoop, I spoke with the florist. Here’s the story.
:spoken with lisp::
“The Lemoges is a spectacular long pink vase with raised veins of baby-blue, accompanied by two smaller globes shaped vases in the same magnificiently tender pink colorations. It will make a wonderful addition to the Cruise’s boudoir. Upon, request, I am going to deliver it personally to Tom’s backdoor.”
jemfysh | May 8, 2006 at 3:28 pm
Hey #6. Check out this quote from Tom just after Suri’s birth…
“It’s indescribable. You hold this newborn, and you realize you’ve got responsibilities like you’ve never had before.”
http://www.usatoday.com/life/movies/news/2006-04-23-cruise-sidebar_x.htm
Seems he never felt responsibility towards to first two…
Tetsuo | May 8, 2006 at 3:28 pm
So, which “mother” did he give these to: Katie, or the poor woman who REALLY carried Xenu Jr. to term?
Tetsuo | May 8, 2006 at 3:29 pm
Oh, and TCLTC.
Feed_Me_Chocolate | May 8, 2006 at 3:34 pm
The florist was laughing all the way to the bank. It seems TC is the laughingstock of the whole damn planet.
Feed_Me_Chocolate | May 8, 2006 at 3:35 pm
What an asshole. I bet his other kids haven’t seen him since he got with Katie. Well, I guess it’s better that way. Maybe Nicole can shield them from the gay freak show that is Tom “I LOVE the cock” Cruise.
sweetcheeks | May 8, 2006 at 3:36 pm
I’m getting my mother a cashmere throw for mother’s day, along with a handmade card that I…
What, nobody CARES about my mother’s day gift? That isn’t newsworthy? You don’t want to read an ENTIRE article about it? My bust.
Christ Almighty, SF guy, give me some fucking gossip already!! Gossip that doesn’t include Tom Cruise’s mother or Lindsay Lohan’s twat.
sweetcheeks | May 8, 2006 at 3:37 pm
P.S. We aren’t officially broken up, SF guy. Just on the rocks.
Feed_Me_Chocolate | May 8, 2006 at 3:40 pm
I believe in giving kudos to funny/creative posts.
#5, 11, and 18,
You all have gold stars beside your names.
BigJim | May 8, 2006 at 3:48 pm
Tom Cruise isn’t interested in gold stars, only chocolate ones.
Zed | May 8, 2006 at 3:50 pm
Oh, look! Katie’s smiling and she has teeth again:
http://www.thesuperficial.com/archives/2006/04/17/katie_holmes_still_really_preg.html
Thank heavens! She was lookin’ mighty homeless-like for a while. And ugly. Just plain old ugly. And fat. But that was probably slightly due to being preggers and all. :)
Aimtrue | May 8, 2006 at 3:51 pm
This is a fatal flaw of many men, even if they like the cock. Never set the bar high. NEVER. Your first aniversary, Mother’s day whatever, make sure her expectations from then on are low. I have spent years, living down the crappy first gift of a nice pecan log from Stuckey’s-but every gift at that has been increasingly, albeit slightly, better. Do you think she ever expects me to do much better than the pecan log? If I surprise her with the gift basket of select meats and cheses, she complains, and so do all her co-workers, but a smile and I say well at least its not a pecan log and I’m home.
I knew a guy who surprised his g/f with a suprise trip, a pre-packed bag of new clothes, money to spend, 4 star hotel, the whoel works- I was impressed, really, but then I said, what do you do next year, or the next five years- you should have seen the look on his face-He is three years in going broke and can’t top it- I’m ten years in and I have not peaked yet and still have money to spend on beer. Trust me on this one-she won’t be disappointed if you keep the expectations low.
boredmilf | May 8, 2006 at 3:59 pm
#29
What the fuck are you talking about? What is $900 bucks to TC?
shankyouverymuch | May 8, 2006 at 4:31 pm
#30
I have to agree with you… According to Forbes, TC has a person fortune worth over 750 million dollars… I think 900 hundred on flowers is barely a piss drop in the ocean for this MoFo…
Man I wish I had a tenth of what’s in his bank account… even if he does love the cock!!!
Jacq | May 8, 2006 at 4:35 pm
#29 – That’s not necessarily true. My ex surprised me with an AmEx card on his account in my name and a trip to Las Vegas for my birthday, TWO MONTHS after we started dating. Turns out, motherfucker didn’t know how to spell my name – so the next card came and he still didn’t have it right. Then, we get to Vegas and he doesn’t plan anything to eat or shows to go to, even though he had been many times before. I spent most of the trip playing video poker because I could be close to the bar and I didn’t know how to play real poker and tables were $5/10 minimum. We had sex once on the trip, when he was so wasted that I ended up putting him in the shower mid-screw. We didn’t even get to the end of the summer together.
So, the moral of the story is that you can try to be ostentatous and it can totally backfire. Or maybe Tom, like mine who was also a Tom, also has a baby-dick. Or maybe she’ll break that vase on his face while he’s sleeping.
Jacq | May 8, 2006 at 4:41 pm
Was it pink peonies or pink penises (?) – I guess we’re back to typo-ville.
Libraesque | May 8, 2006 at 4:43 pm
PEONIES!!!! are you fucking kidding me? how ghetto, they’re like, filler flowers, they’re 50 cents a piece!!! hahahahah what a jackass, maybe on their year anniversary he’ll try even harder to look “straight” and get her carnations. His lover Gregory is probably a florist, and he couldn’t do any better than that. And what’s up with him getting flowers in West Hollywood, the gay mecca of L.A……. For Fathers Day I think I’ll send him a Tom Loves The Cock t-shirt and mug set
brewdick | May 8, 2006 at 4:44 pm
tom: ok katie act suprised when i come out of the closet.
katie: http://www.katieholmespictures.com/gallery/displayimage.php?album=lastup&cat=0&pos=108
Aimtrue | May 8, 2006 at 4:53 pm
#30 & 31
Oh I guess you are right-so then He is a cheapskate- excpet when your $750 mill. is earmarked for L. Ron and male hookers- you just don’t have that much disposable cash laying around so $900 is a significant portion of what is left after paying to get to level theta eata blow and buying underoos ro his consorts.
Jacq | May 8, 2006 at 4:55 pm
#35 – Are those peepers photoshopped? What the fuck? I don’t even need to sleep to have nightmares now. Thanks, brewdick.
Aimtrue | May 8, 2006 at 4:56 pm
#32- call me- I won’t try to impress you with my cash, I will learn how to spell your name Jacq – and I am not a baby dick. I promise I’ll be a step up from your ex- he really set the bar low.
Jedi Kevin | May 8, 2006 at 4:59 pm
It’s good to see that the nursing bra is back where it belongs: on Tom.
prideofchucky | May 8, 2006 at 5:04 pm
Wow, Suri can already WRITE!?!??! Proof of alien intelligence possibly?
Oh great Xenu.. Have mercy on my people, thee doth not mock thou greatness…
ImCurly | May 8, 2006 at 5:11 pm
Man, Amazon woman, I mean Katie Holm-ly looks like SHIT … She has a long way to go before she gets her old body back … I think she needs the number for Brooke Shields trainer, as she already look as vibrant and beautiful as before she gave birth … lmao !!!!
amazed | May 8, 2006 at 5:14 pm
I’d take one look at those peonies and shove them up his ass. Hopefully the Limoges vase is the size he likes!!!
Sweetsens8tion | May 8, 2006 at 5:22 pm
#6 it is so true, by reading all his expressions since having Suri, you would never know he had 2 other children. They were adopted at birth also, so its not like he has never dealt with a newborn…
what irks me is when I read his expressions, he always says “its sublime” wtf?
If I were TC adopted children I would be feeling alot of abandonment. Kinda sad when you think about.
Oh, remember when they were all going to seminars at the Celebrity Center to learn about what the woman’s body goes through during pregnancy and then also on how to take care of a new born, and it stated that the kids were gonna have to take care of the baby in “shifts” wtf? are they hired help now or what?
Sweetsens8tion | May 8, 2006 at 5:42 pm
ive been looking at all those pictures from the movie premiere, and what keeps going through my mind is..does her boobs really look like breast-feeding boobs? I remember when I was breast-feeding they were plump as hell, hers barely look like they are there. And its not like she was flat chested pre-pregnancy…anyone else here whos breast fed? what do you think?
Jacq | May 8, 2006 at 5:46 pm
#38 – That makes me feel a lot better. There’s still a lot of good loving left in me. He never hit bottom – just fucked up the sides. I still owe that “inny-penis” fuck a kick to the jimmy-jammer – low bar-setter.
krisdylee | May 8, 2006 at 5:49 pm
I just overheard my co-worker saying that she thought Tom was a really great guy… Dammit, now I’m gonna have to beat the shit out of her and get fired.
TaftHartley | May 8, 2006 at 6:00 pm
#11 LOFL
Odium | May 8, 2006 at 6:25 pm
wow, i hope they never break up…i think that their “relationship” is a good thing…i think that all bitches as dumb as katie should have to be in realtionships with cock-loving wackjobs, that way they wont procreate(for real, i mean, they can pretend all they want) and there wont be all these mentally impaired, brainwashed cult babies running around…
Odium | May 8, 2006 at 6:27 pm
and #11, thats the funniest fucking thing i’ve heard in a long time
Sodomy_is_for_Girls | May 8, 2006 at 6:31 pm
Jacq:
Did we have a passionate affair in the summer of ’92 where we said we loved each other in a tent?
Nah, probably not…