One of the more humorous elements of my job (besides Spencer Pratt’s face) is when reality shows are reported as if the shit happening on them is real. In this case, Kristy Morgan (above) who “won” this season’s A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila but turned down Tila on the finale. People caught up with Kristy to find out why she chose not to date a fake bisexual. It’s called a script, folks:
“I really went with what my heart said,” Morgan said. “Sometimes you date people, and then it’s not always the happy ending.”
Morgan, who is bisexual, said she was “emotionally unstable” living away from friends and family and in a house full of lesbians and straight men. “It helped me learn what type of woman I want to be, [but] I started to emotionally break down,” she said.
Meanwhile, Tila Tequila is feigning rage on her website and unleashed some angry leprechaun poetry while telling MTV where to dump the pile of cash for a third season:
Thunderfuck my mouth is shut. Been a while, feel like a cunt.
Can’t wait for this drama to pass.
Oh the joy…..fuck you. My ass.
Live a lie.
Tell my mind.
Over soon. I can’t deny.
You will all soon see, the truth in my eyes.
Smile on my face, the loving embrace….but instead I’ll punch you in the face.
For a long time coming….I let you touch me….now that it’s over bitch….You better start running.
Pent up inside….telling these lies….this has gone too far…..the world will soon die.
Only 1 more day. To feel this way. Tomorrow I smile….brings another day!
Back to myself. Nobody else. Fuck all this bullshit. I’m back to myself. Yes. Thank the fuck God.
Wow. That’s quite a verbose entry for someone who has to hop from key to key.
Frank | July 3, 2008 at 9:01 am
Stupid Tequila bitch deserved it anyway. haha
Hydro1974 | July 3, 2008 at 9:01 am
That could be the funniest fucking “poem” I’ve ever read. Tila Tequila – you’re awesome.
Do her legs get tired when she types? I can just see the beads of leprechan sweat forming as she misspells her name.
swexy | July 3, 2008 at 9:02 am
first!
Angry Beaver | July 3, 2008 at 9:05 am
The only “shot” she got was the pearl necklace given to her by her agent, the show’s handlers, the director, the camera crew, the guy who brings in donuts and coffee and the bum sleeping in the alley behind the lot. I keep waiting for her to ask someone on the show for 5 dollars before she loves them long time.
wet newspaper | July 3, 2008 at 9:08 am
Wow. That lady is really yucky looking. And she has a red neck…. literally. I definitely would NOT hit it. Not even with a wet newspaper.
mixedmartialartvideos.com | July 3, 2008 at 9:10 am
too bad i missed the show
toolboy | July 3, 2008 at 9:16 am
Keep aray from my Rucky Charms!!!
numbers | July 3, 2008 at 9:18 am
eighth
rebecc | July 3, 2008 at 9:19 am
WHY IS HER NECK SO RED
JimmyBachaFungool | July 3, 2008 at 9:20 am
(yawn)
Stephen | July 3, 2008 at 9:25 am
you crack me up man; no matter how shitty the day is starting out, you get me laughing right into my cornflakes. And my wife thinks I only come to this website to look at all the pictures of hot women in bikinis.
z | July 3, 2008 at 9:27 am
one fairy die if you don’t believe tila’s a bi
Deacon Jones | July 3, 2008 at 9:33 am
She looks like Meliissa Etheridge with 3 foot hair extensions
TO ZE GAS CHAMBA!!!
jrz | July 3, 2008 at 9:40 am
Shh…if you listen very carefully, you can hear Wiliam Shakespeare rolling over in his grave.
Is Wicca right for you? | July 3, 2008 at 9:41 am
TipToeChick did a new video on youtube. I’m surprised they let her run it for 12 minutes and 51 seconds.
Frist gets really mad at TipToeChick | July 3, 2008 at 9:45 am
This is the answer to TipToeChick’s bar trick. Frist doesn’t like TipToeChick; I made Frist watch TipToeChick’s bar trick question about a week ago and Frist never bothered to figure it out, so I decided to post this in order to annoy Frist some more!
Yay for annoying Frist! : D
gerard Vandenberg | July 3, 2008 at 9:46 am
This tala kitila finds definitely work as a FULL TIME PROSTITUTE!!
wet newspaper | July 3, 2008 at 9:48 am
@ 9 – Because she’s a redneck? HAHA
Sportsdvl | July 3, 2008 at 9:56 am
She wins the award for best looking lesbian of 2008.
theloglady | July 3, 2008 at 10:00 am
THUNDER-FUCK!!
yodolayheehoo | July 3, 2008 at 10:10 am
oh Sportsdvl…I have to disagree with that. :( sadness. Tila Tequila may be the grossest lesbian EVER. and like Superfish says…she’s a freakin leprechaun…ugh. Now Portia de Rossi…now that lesbian…oh sweet jesus…yes please. :)
nikkfa | July 3, 2008 at 10:16 am
she is really sexy, isn’t she?
nikkfa | July 3, 2008 at 10:21 am
my space.com
nikkfa | July 3, 2008 at 10:23 am
http://www.myspace.com
Sunny | July 3, 2008 at 10:44 am
She is pretty and sexy. I think I will love her. LOL. Every time I sign in to the celeb club R I C H L O V I N G.C O M, I can see many new topics talking about her. She has created a nice profile for seeking a great man for hook ups.
Your Fat Mom | July 3, 2008 at 11:08 am
She looks like one of those white trash bitches from Arizona or New Mexico who try to switch up and act all “in the know” once they get to Los Angeles, but then when their brother comes to visit he wears flannel shirts and listens to Limp Bizkit.
Yeah, so she’s pretty much a worthless skank.
Tila Tequila is an asian worthless skank, so the white worthless skank probably didn’t want the bitchy attitude of self-entitlement when she could get the same thing from a woman whose pussy doesn’t smell as much.
Albi, The racist Dragon | July 3, 2008 at 11:10 am
Fuck Whitman, Poe and Alighieri……..Tila should be appointed Poet Laureate.
Me so horny.
Bigheadmike | July 3, 2008 at 11:15 am
She blond is quite ugly…
Breasts look good but the face has got to go!
mimi | July 3, 2008 at 11:22 am
OLD FISH NEWS… I mean OLD NEWS FISH!
Kristy Morgan turned Tila down so she would have a clean slate for…
DUN DUN DUN DUN
A SHOT AT LOVE #3
Do they think we are ALL stupid?
Corlyss | July 3, 2008 at 11:49 am
Angsty teen poetry ftl.
Maggie | July 3, 2008 at 11:58 am
That was fucking amazing, she like.. totally expressed what’s been in my heart. She’s a master wordsmith.
mar.mar | July 3, 2008 at 12:03 pm
29# yah dude!
they prob told morgan shed get an extra 1000 to dump her…..
“tila you told me to be true to myself andi if i take this key im not being true to myself”
taking extra money was being true to mtv yay
tp | July 3, 2008 at 12:18 pm
Thunderfuck?!?!???? What the hell does Thunderfuck mean?? She’s so fucking worthless. And that blonde bitch his hideous.
Seriously... | July 3, 2008 at 12:20 pm
What did she win? Sterilization? A mouth full of shotgun?
Please, God, let it be a mouth full of shotgun…
*crosses fingers*
Erica | July 3, 2008 at 1:34 pm
The guy was slightly attractive.
wtf. | July 3, 2008 at 1:43 pm
if bo won… i would give the show a chance.. but… i read this spoiler a MONTH ago, and it held up true. this show is bullshit. why is tila, publicly, angry now, a month later?!
justifiable | July 3, 2008 at 1:51 pm
Dear Jesus, my one prayer for the future is that Tila Tequila will fall hopelessly in lust with Heidi Montag and blow away Spencer Pratt with a 12-gauge in order to have her. Then they both die in a murder-suicide pact. Really, Jesus, is that to much to ask for?
Tila's ginormous head | July 3, 2008 at 2:01 pm
HAHAHAHA #7….thats fucking classic. Tila needs to go back to her native midget land and frolick with all the other Leprechauns. Oh, and #37 I second that!!!
wow | July 3, 2008 at 3:28 pm
Holy shit. That was the most senseless, ill-constructed, useless, crude shit i’ve ever read.
Who actually is buying into the show? I have a terrible feeling that there will be a season 3… and 4. And… oh god kill me.
wtf | July 3, 2008 at 3:52 pm
SOMEONE INTRODUCE HER TO AMY WINEHOUSE!!! That would surely be a Gruesome Twosome of EPIC proportions and a definite ratings winner.
douchebag Mcgee | July 3, 2008 at 6:20 pm
I don’t care what anyone says.
I’d bang the VD out of tila, if i ever got the chance.
And yes, my sperm can even cure cancer.
Flavio | July 3, 2008 at 6:47 pm
that girls actually pretty hot, at least in the breast dept. I’d much rather put stick it between her boobs than stick it in any of Tila’s orifices…
Racer X | July 3, 2008 at 7:19 pm
She looks like Memphis Monroe.
/for reals
Dizzy | July 3, 2008 at 10:07 pm
I second # 34-
PLEASE…. let it be a mouthful of shotgun!
Roxinater | July 3, 2008 at 10:51 pm
Makes you wonder how she types capital letters.
Humanwreckage | July 3, 2008 at 11:13 pm
Well, considering Tila’s a fake bisexual…it’s no wonder this thing won. She looks like a 50 year old post-op tranny with dollar store hair extentions, the worst fake tan I’ve ever seen, and the poise of a horny male gorilla. Hot. If I had a penis it would be begging me to put it out of it’s misery.
omgwtf | July 4, 2008 at 4:12 am
Is she a Lindsay Lohan impersonator?
Steffen | July 4, 2008 at 5:29 am
She is pretty and sexy. I think I will love her. LOL. Every time I sign in to the celeb club R I C H L O V I N G.C O M, I can see many new topics talking about her. She has created a nice profile for seeking a great man for hook ups.
the thompson | July 4, 2008 at 11:05 am
Wow… Tila can rhyme face with… uh… FACE! She’s so talented
devilsrain | July 4, 2008 at 12:34 pm
I guess you have to give the whore some credit, she is on tv and we are talking about her. Of course that doesnt change the fact that she is an ugly asian whore with breast implants. I forgot, talentless. (unless you count blowjobs as a talent, which i guess you could)