Tila Tequila plot thickens (Now with more leprechaun naked time)

September 11th, 2009 // 51 Comments

Seen here sporting bruises yesterday, San Diego’s 10news.com has an alleged rundown of the Tila Tequila/Shawne Merriman incident and it’s a tale rife with jilted hearts, threesomes and naked leprechauns. Enjoy:

The sources told Vara that witnesses at Merriman’s home said the three-time Pro Bowl linebacker went to his bedroom with two women.
Sources said Tequila walked into the room and Merriman asked her to join them. However, the sources said Tequila reacted angrily and threatened to have sex with a member of Merriman’s entourage.
According to sources, Tequila was intoxicated, and she got naked and attempted to leave the house.
Sources told Vara that Merriman, 25, tried to stop the 27-year-old Tequila, and that is when she called 911.
Tequila accused Merriman of choking and throwing her to the ground while she was trying to leave the house. Tequila signed a citizen’s arrest warrant accusing Merriman of battery and false imprisonment. Both are felonies.

Here’s what I don’t get: If Tila Tequila was running around stupid drunk trying to bang the entire room, which I’d bet money happened, why not just let her leave? Seriously, what the hell is she going to do that anyone will believe? “Hey, a nude Keebler elf Twittered in a pool of her own urine that Shawne Merriman’s an asshole. Let’s cancel his contract.” C’mon.

superficial

  1. Mike

    Big surprise.

    Now please post something worth reading.

  2. Town Pump

    Well, that explains it all. It was just an orgy gone wrong. Too bad I can’t sue somebody every time that happens to me.

  3. butt

    Superficial writer, please stop making rude comments about her height. I am about the same height as her and I know how it feels. Tila is a good person.

  4. ROUGH daddy

    So you’re saying she got treated like a chicken head and was not pleased? Typical, her type always mis-calcutated their place…

  5. Bobbysox

    Merriman is douche. He has been since college in Maryland (UMD is known for producing losers). Moreover, he is a crybaby and a poor sportsman. Screw him and his “lights out” dance. Funny, how he has not been productive since getting busted for juice. What a loser

  6. Mac

    3….

    Tila is a good person… classic.

    Good people don’t get others arrested when they were doing them a favor. He should have let her leave. Public intoxication, indecent exposure… if not those things then it’s probably because her crazy drunk a** walked into traffic. Sounds like he was doing her a favor and she returns the favor by getting him locked up because she is an attention wh*re. She is a good person though.

  7. Mac

    5….

    I hope you’re a Boston fan.

    Red Sox won a championship because their two best players were juicing. Also, Schilling faked a foot injury with fake blood to fool batters into thinking he wasn’t fully healthy.

    Rodney Harrison also juiced. The Patriots won every Super Bowl by 3 points and had a library of everyones play calling. Without that library they win 0 super bowls.

    How about Paul Pierce flashing gang signs and getting stabbed in a gang related incident? Kevin Garnette treating waterboys and equipment managers like s***? He insults them and c*cks off. Classy

    Yep, your Sox and Boston teams are real classy.

    So, Merriman is a cry baby cheater? Ha.

  8. bobbysox

    #7, I am not a Boston fan. Merriman is a douche. I know him personally from college and he was a “roided” douche there.

    You could go on an on about how athletes have character issues, I would agree. But, Merriman has been pathetic since he got off the juice

  9. Aaron

    If I had a quarter for every time that I was humiliated by being a groupie, I would be a very rich person. The black guys are especially cruel sometimes.

  10. NEVER BACK DOWN MAN

    This turboslut had it coming. Either bang all the guys as advertised or stfu and be normal.

  11. huh

    What bruises?

  12. Mr. Obvious

    that’s a pretty wild story, but given the people involved it’s also believable.

    Damn, did Tila just age 20 years in 2?

  13. Midget toss

    @ #3- Do you have a squeaky little voice that goes weeweewee? I will set my beer can on your head for you.

  14. huh

    I take it back. TMZ has more photos that show pretty bad bruising on her arm.

  15. Meg

    @3– Just because shes short , shes a good person? LOL I am vertically challanged as well and I would not act like this hoe EVER. She pimps herself out on reality shows and twitter. AND who’s closet did she rob for that outfit? She is really playing up the victim for attention and I don’t think that makes her a “good person”. Merriman could have restrained her easily, but being so small its easier to be wirey and get out of it, bruises would be the out come. Acting like a skank 98% of the time and living the party lifestyle is going to result in shit like this. She would be smart to learn from her mistakes and STFU.

  16. Hoe

    Tila, who made a career of being a slut, is offended when a NFL player treats her like a slut and ask her to join his threesome.

    She should be happy she’s not inside a suitcase, inside a dumpster.

  17. Ragman

    So she has bruises now? Funny that the hospital didn’t find anything.

    Thankfully for her “career”, this incident stalled the clock at about 14 minutes. Chances are she’ll milk this thing for all it’s got.

    Allergic to alcohol?!?! We’ve seen her drink on her show!!!

    If she can’t make up her mind between boys and girls, then maybe she can hook-up with Spencer and Heidi — they were all made for each other. They can keep their fame afloat by promoting each other.

  18. alex

    omg shes so ugly up close like when u really take a good look at her!

  19. Ralph

    What a piece of shit she is.

  20. Granny's grandchild

    My sweet Grandma would say “Lay down with dogs, get up with fleas.”

  21. Athena

    No one here knows what its like to be a woman and be abused by a much larger boyfriend like I do. I don’t care how annoying or drunk or abusive she is, no woman should ever be touched except lovingly. It doesn’t matter if its not fair, men have had it too good for too long, and now its time to pay up. Not that you american idiots would understand this. If you treated ALL WOMEN with respect, regardless of how they acted, your country wouldn’t be bankrupt!!!

  22. hide your beagle Vicks and eagle

    #16……now that was some funny shit

  23. Willie Dixon

    Nice PR move: stop dressing like a stripper and have sleeves that show the “injuries”.

  24. Zach

    Ya know 21 I agree that abusing a women or touching her in any sort of way is not right however, there are times, especially when intoxicated where women decide to do stupid things and have to be manhandled. Case in point my ex decide she was gonna go for a joy walk on a freeway after getting smashed at a club. I had to manhandle her to get her back into the car. She bit, kicked screamed bloody murder swung and punched me. In the morning she woke up with nasty bruises on her arms and midsections where I had to grab her and fight her to get back to the car.
    So, until you know the fact I wouldn’t side either way. And that’s a pretty feminist and sexist thing to be saying that regardless of what you do you should be treated nicely. The street runs both ways. Also if you know anything about our current economic crisis our country (which is yours as well) is current trillions of dollars in debt, so women aren’t do THAT great of a job.

  25. Zach

    Ya know 21 I agree that abusing a women or touching her in any sort of way is not right however, there are times, especially when intoxicated where women decide to do stupid things and have to be manhandled. Case in point my ex decide she was gonna go for a joy walk on a freeway after getting smashed at a club. I had to manhandle her to get her back into the car. She bit, kicked screamed bloody murder swung and punched me. In the morning she woke up with nasty bruises on her arms and midsections where I had to grab her and fight her to get back to the car.
    So, until you know the fact I wouldn’t side either way. And that’s a pretty feminist and sexist thing to be saying that regardless of what you do you should be treated nicely. The street runs both ways. And calling us American idiots really helps show just how educated and superior you are.

  26. Aunt Jemima

    Has anyone checked her immigration status? Can we get her deported please?

  27. Richport's Ghost

    @16 – right on!

  28. EvenSteven

    @25, Zach,

    Well said.

    The world has become so politically correct, that shamefully, common f*cking sense has become politically INCORRECT.

  29. oishii

    @26 Aunt Jemima: stfu and go make me some pancakes bitch!

  30. Nero

    It looks like they had a lil orgy there.

  31. Nero

    The question arises here,and that’s the whole problem.How reliable are these witnesses? They’re probably part of his entourage and some bitches.

  32. Nero

    For sure his entourage would protect him.How reliable are the bitches?

  33. Darth

    @32
    You’ve good point there mr. Holmes.

  34. yeah.

    Battery isn’t always a felony.

    *clears throat*

    Don’t ask how I know that.

  35. Daryl G.

    I don’t care what’s going on, you generally don’t want people you know, that are coming out of your house, running around a neighborhood drunk and naked.

  36. Aunt Jemima

    #29 and especially #3, if I was to go make some more flap-jacks they’d be taller than this whore.

  37. Aunt Jemima

    P fucking S! Why does her face always look like she’s pulling 9 Gs in a F-22 Raptor?

  38. go bye

    DA tossed the case AND the dwarf!

  39. she looks like an addict..

  40. mm

    A place someone who can treat you as a king or who can spoil you like a queen, this is the great place. It’s dedicated for those sugar daddies ^^^^^ Sugarloves.Com ^^^^are rich and successful to support and pamper women who will treat you like a king and for sugar babies who are attractive and young to seek a generous benefactor to mentor and take care of you.

  41. It's me

    I can’t believe anyone would stick anything in this drippy skank

  42. denise

    Only MTV could find this used up, over processed, over exposed
    whore good looking.
    YUCK

  43. tom

    I’m gonna need some Tequila to get the image of her face out of my head

  44. dee

    Hey Aunt Jemima, you’re funny , keep it up
    Like the pancakes too!!!!!

  45. Nerdy

    Hong Kong Blonde
    Hong Kong Blonde
    Hong Kong Blonde
    Hong Kong Blonde
    Hong Kong Blonde
    Hong Kong Blonde

    Over 9,000

  46. blond … but I think not stupid ….

  47. Dude

    @ #9 Why you pathetic little creep! You’re a fucking self-admitted groupie, yet you want to whine about being humiliated? Priceless!

    You’re a piece of shit by definition, jerk! Of course they humiliate you, that’s what you’re there for, asshole! They let YOU hang around for THEIR amusement, that’s the price of being a groupie, asshole..

    Unbelievable! You’re a groupie and you don’t even understand what your role is, it’s a trade-off, bitch!

  48. Tim

    Get a life people! You’re all arrogant and egocentric no wonder your country is bancrupt! Go get you a job lol

  49. This turboslut had it coming. Either bang all the guys as advertised or stfu and be normal.

Leave A Comment