Tiger Woods pretends to answers questions

March 22nd, 2010 // 39 Comments

Obviously not one to let Jesse James steal his poon thunder, Tiger Woods granted ESPN a five-minute-only interview Sunday night for the sole purpose of repeating his press conference verbatim while making sure everybody knows he banged every single one of those women:

Rinaldi: You’ve said you’ve made transgressions. How would you, in your own words, describe the depth of your infidelity?
Woods: Well, just one is, is enough. And obviously that wasn’t the case, and I’ve made my mistakes. And as I’ve said, I’ve hurt so many people, and so many people I have to make an amends to, and that’s living a life of amends.

Of course, judging by his monotone speaking voice the entire time, this could all just be a clever PR ruse to trick the Masters’ audience into believing Tiger Woods is a robot incapable of human emotions. “He can’t help his heart is nothing but a mass of futuristic diamonds and whore magnets. Let the android man play golf!”

Photos: Getty

  1. ur mom


  2. ur mom

    I agree, it’s between Tiger & Elin…I really don’t care who Tiger sleeps with and after hearing about it over and over these past few months, I wonder when the media will finally come to the same conclusion.

    Even though he’s famous, I fail to see how that means he owes the public anything. He’s free to do what he wants with his life, just like everyone else.

  3. Kirk

    He golfs, he’s the best, by far, of the current golfers, maybe the best of all time. Why would anyone care about what he does or did in his personal life? Oh yea, jealousy and schadenfruede.

  4. Mr. Nice Guy

    The big lie was the answer to why did you Marry Elin. The Truth is she pretended to be a Hot Sexual Women long enough to have his child, and then shut down.
    Derek Jeter & George Clooney get it right, don’t get married until later in life, if at all. With a prenuptial agreement.

  5. lauren

    that photo looks like he pretends to play golf also..

  6. Crabby Old Guy

    The slut media continues to prop up stuff like this (especially ESPN with the Brett Farve – will he or won’t he retire????) because they are as much of a whore as Tiger was/is. Then they can act all “concerned” about him – like they really give a crap if he wasn’t a great golfer. They do the same crocodile tears about John Daly and his drinking. So he liked some strange – it’s between him and his wife and his God.

  7. Bob Vila

    “I’ve hurt so many people” – Tiger:Sent: 04:06 PM 08/29/2009:
    Slap your face. Treat you like a dirty little whore. Put my cock in your ass and then shove it down your throat…

    Yeah, sounds about right.

  8. cc

    ‘Treatment’ my ass. Are their Douchebag Clinics?

  9. Doc Schweinstrudel

    I liked how South Park made fun of this nasty douchebag!

  10. abby

    I caught the South Park last night, it was funny.

  11. He has become irrelevant. Let him slither away to the dregs of the earth where he belongs.

  12. Crusty

    This year’s Master’s tournament will break every viewing record for televised golf.

    And Tiger will again be the sport’s current savior.

    And we’ll all move on.

  13. This ape probably has 10 mulatto kids running around with mommy porn stars.

    Gotta love Elin, no gold digger there, no sir…..

  14. All here I thought that men golfed because they couldn’t get laid!….Please visit my link and sign the petition. It would mean alot to me. Thank you.

  15. Okay, Greatest Golfer ever!!…Also Greatest Ratings ever, on his return to the Masters!…The stupid robot is a moron who happens to be programmed to play great golf. Otherwise he is a sub-human…albeit a very rich sub-human. Forget the “nicey-nicey” act Tiger, you idiot! As long as you pull in the ratings…nobody cares. NOBODY !!!

  16. Fruit Loop

    “I have hurt so many people, not just my wife………….

    mostly those bitches that I was choking out while I was ramming them up the ass……but through therapy I’ve learned that savage assfucking wasn’t what I really wanted, all I really wanted was love”

  17. Smarm

    “11. Giggles – March 22, 2010 11:17 AM

    He has become irrelevant. Let him slither away to the dregs of the earth where he belongs.”

    That has to be the dumbest fucking thing I’ve read yet today, and lets be honest, there’s no shortage of dumb shit said on this site… sorry, ‘giggles’, but you wishing Tiger was ‘irrelevant’ does not make it so. Hes still the best fucking golfer on the planet, still could buy your house about 6 billion times over (then again I could probably do the same with my change left over from nickel beer night), and still is a huge draw. So just because you dislike him, means, well, jack shit. Shut the fuck up, and choke on a dick- if you can find anyone who’ll fuck you. A stretch, I know…but you can dream.

  18. StEvec

    To Smarm:

    El Dick is still a douchebag and so are you. You sound like you talk from personal experience when you talk about “choking on a dick,” so go ahead and keep gobbling those big ones, asshole.

  19. Billy Boy

    It’s all the wizard alien’s fault!

  20. Doc Schweinstrudel

    HA HA #19, exactly!

  21. One of Tiger's beat-up hookers

    Why make a personal apology then set up a sbsequent interview and say it’s all an entirely private issue?
    Albeit, I’d say it was private too if I was caught out fucking VD-infected bacon rashers.

  22. who dat

    That interview was lame and so was the guy asking the questions. Tiger said “he loved her” as in past tense. He was obviously lying in the important questions. Watch how he closes his eyes when answering the tough questions. It’s called a “deceptive tell”. Tiger is a fucking lair trying once again to deceive.

  23. Kickass

    TIGER is an Arrogant Retarded Ass . He is such a Cheap Moronic Ass. Worth Billions and yet he can not spend 30.00 dollars to buy a Separate Hoe Phone.He gives his Hoes is Personal Cell# and he enters their numbers into it. Then just leaves the phone lying around the house when he is home. This dumb ass asked for that ass whipping from Elin. After watch that so called Apology on TV. I can say with full confidence Tiger Woods will be getting his ass kicked by Elin Again. The Boy just is not smart enough to be a Player.

  24. Respectful Critic

    This guy is just retarded. It’s not so much that he cheated; but with all those women and the evidence against him.

    Every word outta his mouth was either rehearsed or a lie.

    Elin needs to dump this loser.

    Although I will say; he doesn’t owe the mistresses anything. Rather; they should be kissing Elin’s feet hoping she doesn’t beat them over the head with a golf club.

  25. farang

    the guy is part Thai. What does anyone expect… fidelity? 99.99% of thai people don’t know the meaning of the word let alone practice it.

  26. Thank you for sharing out

  27. Thank you for sharing out

  28. He has become irrelevant. Let him slither away to the dregs of the earth where he belongs.

  29. captain america

    just ask…………………………………BUT NEVER ANSWER!!

  30. TMZ

    I don’t know why you have such an obsession with bashing woods. I understand you bash most other celebs on this site but wood’s is no different than any other celeb in that they don’t answer questions about their personal life so if most other celebs like having a private life, then why should wood’s let the world know about his? You’re ridiculous with bashing wood’s and his “robot incapable of human emotions”, have you not noticed that most other celebs are the same way? Why are you crucifying wood’s? So what, he’s a unfaithful infidel who did what a good portion of married men so often, what’s the big deal?

  31. why even talk about it now, the hype has died down. just say i was a an ultra-douche, sorry, and do you know anyone who fixes cadillac windows?

  32. Del

    My question is this, is Woods and obama related some how? The reason I ask is they are both good at not answering a question straight.

  33. he has so many women!

  34. best wishes to you

  35. Thank you for your sharing.

  36. I think, Media slut continues to support things like this (especially with ESPN Brett farve – or it is not ????) retirement because they have much of a bitch that Tiger was / is. Then they can act all interested parties "about him – as they really give a shit if it was not a great golfer. They crocodile tears over John Daly herself and her drinking. So in love with a stranger – is between him and his wife and his God.

  37. My question is this, is Woods and obama related some how? The reason I ask is they are both good at not answering a question straight.

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