Tiger Woods Got WASTED

May 8th, 2013 // 41 Comments
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It was then, at that moment, that Tiger Woods realized Lindsey Vonn wasn’t Elin Nordegren this whole time.

So remember how Tiger Woods made an uncharacteristically public appearance with Lindsey Vonn at the MET Gala because he’s trying not to be a withdrawn, secretive hooker banging machine hell-bent on golf and fucking? Turns out he was so uncomfortable he got shit-hammered drunk and she had to carry him out. Us Magazine reports:

At one point in the evening, the once-divorced golfer got up to dance awkwardly, bopping from side to side and grabbing Vonn’s butt affectionately as she giggled.
When it was time to go, around 2 a.m., a seemingly tipsy Woods fell while walking up a small flight of stairs — and didn’t move from the spot until Vonn, clenching her teeth and looking embarrassed, helped him up and guided him (swaying a bit as he walked) to the exit, according to a witness.

In Tiger Woods’ defense, at least he didn’t marry her, have kids, then plow the entire world behind her back making her look like a doormat gold-digger to the entire world. In fact, by comparison, this is probably the most romantic thing he’s ever done for a woman. He probably wept afterward he was so overcome with emotion. “I’m sorry.. *wipes tears* I’ve just.. I’ve just never felt comfortable enough to be this nice in a relationship before, you know? *pukes on her shoes* Okay, you can blow me now.”

Photo: Splash News

superficial

  1. Tiger Woods Drunk Lindsay Vonn MET Gala
    stinkfinger
    Commented on this photo:

    That is a really good photobomb.

  2. Am I the only one seeing a little Jenna Bush Hager in Vonn’s face?

  3. Tiger Woods Drunk Lindsay Vonn MET Gala
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s looks like he’s rolling his balls off….I dont think this was from a couple too many Coors Lites…

  4. Tiger Woods Drunk Lindsay Vonn MET Gala
    Commented on this photo:

    Tiger looks like he just got visited by the ghost of pussy past.

    • Cock Dr

      Doncha just hate it when that happens?
      Tiger should not have accepted that sugar cube from the fashion model while they were discussing her golf game in the ladies room handicapped access stall. Big mistake.

  5. Tiger Woods Drunk Lindsay Vonn MET Gala
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    In every picture, there’s a hispanic man in the background providing a surprise anal penetration to a famous golfer.

  6. Tiger Woods Drunk Lindsay Vonn MET Gala
    etr
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m way behind the times. Didn’t he beg his ex to take him back and sign over all of his money to convince her?

  7. That is an odd reaction to alcohol. First beer?

  8. Tiger Woods Drunk Lindsay Vonn MET Gala
    Commented on this photo:

    “Elin spelled backwards is Nile? This changes everything, Tigey. EVERYTHING!”

  9. Jesus Christ. He looks like one of those troll doll wrist exercisers where the eyes pop out when you squeeze.

  10. Tiger Woods Drunk Lindsay Vonn MET Gala
    Commented on this photo:

    ” Mr Woods Congratulations for winning the US Open ,here’s the green jacket presented by your ex-wife and the gopher from “Caddy Shack”
    Tiger,”er thanks?”
    (body shaking)= supernova wasted

  11. Tiger Woods Drunk Lindsay Vonn MET Gala
    Booboo
    Commented on this photo:

    So Lindsay going to play but she cant believe he’s changed at all…still don’t buy this setup. Elin never played the fame/PR game and kept it classy at the recent President’s Correspondence Dinner. She also rocks a bikini like few others and track pants with ball cap at her daughter’s ball game.

  12. Tiger Woods Drunk Lindsay Vonn MET Gala
    Commented on this photo:

    “Tiger! Tiger, did you hear the that the PGA just announced a steroid testing policy?”

  13. UJ

    That’s the same look he had when Rodney Dangerfield ran him over with his yacht.

  14. nk

    Holy shit what happened to his face? Was he always this ugly?

  15. Tiger Woods Drunk Lindsay Vonn MET Gala
    Commented on this photo:

    “What if i have a long lost twin brother…who is a tiger… whose name is Human City!!!!”

  16. Tiger Woods Drunk Lindsay Vonn MET Gala
    Commented on this photo:

    “Holy shit, is that a tiger in the car?! Wait no i am just seeing things…but if i get in, then there will be a Tiger in that car!!!?

  17. Tiger Woods Drunk Lindsay Vonn MET Gala
    Doctor_Joystick
    Commented on this photo:

    “Whatchu mean they ain’t gonna do 5 dollar footlongs no more?!?!”

  18. Tiger Woods Drunk Lindsay Vonn MET Gala
    Commented on this photo:

    The beauty part is that the way this picture looks to us is the way the whole world looked to him at that moment.

  19. Tiger Woods Drunk Lindsay Vonn MET Gala
    Thomas
    Commented on this photo:

    I didn’t know Isaiah Thomas was into photography

  20. Tiger Woods Drunk Lindsay Vonn MET Gala
    Kat
    Commented on this photo:

    “Did that photographer just tell me he’s the black Tiger Woods?”

  21. anonymoose

    Tiger is a chinless wonder. That blond is more man than he is.

  22. peanut

    sorry…but tiger woods is a complete scumbag. i think he is a total trash.

  23. Tiger Woods Drunk Lindsay Vonn MET Gala
    Gail
    Commented on this photo:

    So he had a few too many drinks, who hasn’t? He need to let some steam out and have some fun the way the Media has been attacking him ,so he stumbled and fell,Hell , I’ve done that and I don’t drink. So why make a big issue out of nothing. Be real people he is not a angel ,none of us are and if you think you are then youj have a rude awakeing coming to ya.

  24. Tiger Woods Drunk Lindsay Vonn MET Gala
    Mama Pinkus
    Commented on this photo:

    gawd he is one FUGLY man

  25. So Tiger got drunk at a party, not sure what the big fucking deal is? OMG, the horror.

  26. Tiger Woods Drunk Lindsay Vonn MET Gala
    Commented on this photo:

    MmmmK, Ima make a prediction right here. right now.

    If Tiger Woods keeps hanging with blonde white women, bleacher or otherwise, he will come to no good. Because they’re actually not quite human. Especially the bleachers. They’re vampires without the cool thang.

  27. Tiger Woods Drunk Lindsay Vonn MET Gala
    Commented on this photo:

    so he was banging all those women to prove to himself he wasn’t gay, just look at his face, he loves anal so much

  28. cc

    Vonn is such a fucking idiot, it’s depressing.

  29. tom

    That guy is such an hypocrite. Why don’t he go around banging chicks if he likes that?

  30. Tiger Woods Drunk Lindsay Vonn MET Gala
    Oz Matters
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey! Tiger, Tiger! Do that impersonation again of the Michael Jackson autopsy!

  31. Tiger Woods Drunk Lindsay Vonn MET Gala
    Commented on this photo:

    There’s a time and place for every thing . It shows that Tiger has no class , even if he’s wearing a Georgio Armani suit he still has no class !!! This was their first appearance together besides the FB photos ,He was supposed to prove and show to his critics that he at least was trying to change and show his date respect ! But,then again she’s a piece of trash just like he is !!! Because no woman in her right mind would touch him with a 10 foot pole. After she made that comment in th 2010 Olympics, ” Tiger, I too have a sex problem” Who knew she wasn’t joking ? Lindsey has no class or self respect for herself . He was a deviant sex addict cheater and now you could add drunk too the list , and I truly believe she is the same !!! She’s not the the girl next door and role model for our kids , as the media make her out to be ! Two narcissist . !

    • I always liked him, but now I see your point – I mean, really, a rich young famous athlete drinking alcohol and having sex with women! Ha! What a jerk he is! Who does that?

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