Posted by Photo Boy
Kate Winslet secretly wed something called ‘Ned Rocknroll’ earlier this month, so let’s all go ahead and assume that’s just a hairdoll made from Leonardo DiCaprio‘s beard trimmings and move on to a much more pressing matter. That pic up there. Yep, that’s Jessica Simpson‘s husband, Eric Johnson, gazing at his sister-in-law’s bikini-clad ass. And did I mention he’s drunk? Because he’s probably also drunk. I used to wonder if Eric Johnson might be the smartest man in the world, but now I’m positive of it. Not only did he manage to permanently link his DNA with Little Debbie’s fashion empire, but he also doubled down on that shit as soon as he realized Weight Watchers was onto their $3 million design plan to convert their pool into a deep fryer. “What? Your sister’s butt? No, no honey, she sat on a bag of Cheetos in the car and I was just trying to brush off the crumbs for he– AHH, MY FINGERS, SHE BIT MY GODDAMN FINGERS OFF!!” (They were chocolate decoys. See above: Man in The Word, Smartest)
Photo: Fame/Flynet, INFdaily
Will she turn him gay too?
ewwwwww
WTF is that? Bag lady.
poundable
O HAI DERE
Look at how closely their assistant is shadowing this nutjob.
Like at any second she could snap and drown that kid in the ocean.
(OK, did Ashley take 4 Adderall today, or only 3?)
While the rest of us are staring at her ass, he’s actually just looking at the little girl…wait, that doesn’t sound better.
Little boy. That’s Bronx Mowg … I can’t with that name.
Thank you! Completely agree that he’s watching the little kid play.
Ashlee Simpson’s Thought Bubble: “Is he looking? Is he checking me out and wanting my ass? Screw my idiot sister…if she can’t hang on to her men it’s not MY fault!”
idk but I’d wager that Ashlee could find her own batman trucker hat wearing unkempt doofus without bothering to mess with her sister’s. then again, she’s retarded, so maybe she hasn’t figured this out yet.
Why go out and search when there’s one right there?
“Ashlee, get your hand out of my pocket. For christsake, I’m trying to stay flacid here…”
WTF AM I LOOKING AT
Well, hello there. This is the best I’ve ever seen her look. That’s a nice Christmas ham.
Jessica must be out breaching with her pod
The squid blew its ink sack again.
Ashlee’s face looks great from this angle.
not to spoil the fun, but he’s looking at the child or something in that general direction. however, due to the effect of a long focal length lens, you get what’s called “compression” making everything look like its on the same plane and duder’s checking out her ass.
i wish i could somehow randal this response up, but i’m not that smrt.
Everyone here is vacationing on Jess’s Weight Watchers dime.
If doofus cowboy fucks that up, and right after successfully implanting another Simpson fetus in the primary Simpson moneymaking womb, he’s even dumber than I thought.
Where her burka go?
Ashlee has a very nice ass
This just looks like Ashlee (Ashley?) Simpson looking to see if anyone is looking at her ass….. whatshisface isn’t though….. story of her life really.
Kesha?
He looks like Ted Nugents retarded brother…and thats relative to Ted being pretty retarded himself.
Is he looking? I’m looking. It’s no Meester-level ass, but I’ll check out anything if it’s bent over like that.
You know you’re fucked when they appoint Bertneh in her 2007 wig to watch over you watching over your kid.
Damnit Fish! Disable the stupid back-and-forth scrolling with the arrow keys already! STOP FIXING WHAT ISN’T BROKEN, DUDE!!
Nice view!!
He’s not looking at Ashlee’s ass. He’s trying to determine if Ashlee and her son would buy him enough time should Oahu run out of cheese and barbeque sauce. Jessica gets kind mean when places run out of cheese and barbeque sauce.
Ashlee in her natural form. “Neigh! Neigh!”
I guess I’m the only one who likes Ashlee
Perfect position
My damm husband is queer, my daughter named her son after cartoon characters, and my other daughter’s babies daddy is staring at her tight ass.
My life sucks officially.
Tina
Are you blind? He’s not even looking at dat ass.
You’re trying to create a story that isn’t there. He’s not looking at her ass, he’s smelling her fart and liking it.