This Betty White Thing Needs to Stop

Let me start off by saying Betty White is a national treasure. She’s an adorable, whip-smart, progressive old lady with decades of comedic timing under her belt, and her resurgence this past year has been a sincere, well-deserved little movement that no one could speak ill of without looking like a purse snatcher from a Bugs Bunny cartoon. That being said, it’s time to pay the bill on this one, and that bill is octogenarian sex talk. Via People:

“Does desire melt away with age? I’m waiting for that day to come,” the 88-year-old tells AARP Magazine in its November/December issue. “Sexual desire is like aging,” she continues, pointing at her head. “A lot of it is up here.”
“The secret to our marriage was enthusiasm,” White says. “When I knew Allen was coming home, I would freshen my makeup and put on a new blouse.”
And the sex was apparently great, too. If Ludden were alive today, White thinks they’d still be sleeping together. But if he were unavailable, White has a second choice. “I don’t have a fella,” she says, “but if Allen – or Robert Redford – were around, we’d have a very active sex life.”

I guess this kind of talk is unsettling to me because I have basically the quintessential 72-year-old grandma who lives across town and there’s really only three things I need to know about her:

She bakes delicious cookies.
She likes Nicholas Sparks novels.
She drinks white zinfandel out of the smallest glass I’ve ever seen in my life on special occasions.

But now, thanks to Betty White, I’ll be at this poor woman’s funeral trying to erase the words “melting with desire” from my brain. I knew this would happen.

Photos: Splash News

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