They all get girlfriends.

May 17th, 2010 // 128 Comments

Should I have said Spoiler Alert?

Here’s Pauly D and Vinny of Jersey Shore posing with their “girlfriends” in Miami because apparently MTV’s going to shoehorn in a storyline that doesn’t involve these kids forgetting what their nicknames are and/or drunkenly banging Cuban immigrants as they wash ashore. “I’m pretty sure I’m Cannoli and you’re Andy Garcia Jr. Now help me tip this raft over, dawg, because you know I gots to be gettin’ laid.”

(As for Snooki, everyone finally acknowledges she’s a sea lion and drop her into the harbor in hopes she’ll find her real family. She’s killed three days later by the propellor of a speedboat. There was Cool Whip on board.)

Photos: Splash News
superficial

  1. Hater

    Okay seriously what is in that dickheads hair? Glue?

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  3. minx

    @ 19

    The lady in the green bikini has thighs like Gisele, but she probably shouldn’t be wearing a thong in public either.

  4. bernard

    that tall, skinny one must fuck like animal…

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  7. Jose Limon

    I must be drunker than I thought I was: I thought the tall chick looked hot (from the back). Squinting, from the front, not so much.

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  36. Jon

    It’s sad that the only hot piece of news lately is trash like this for MTV trash TV shows showing trashy wanabe celebs.

    Nice asses though.

  37. turd da third

    just ugly people doing ulgy things,, NOT news

  38. Jen

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  39. Van Halen

    The short one’s ass is quite fine. so what else is new?

  40. Deacon Jones

    @68

    They show the Jersey Shore in England? Holy shit, I can’t believe they’re still our allies..

    And I would fuck the shit out of that chick in the green bikini and use the other one for fish bait, she’s wicked

  41. Rasputins Liver

    *

    The chicks who think the rest of the world wants to gaze upon their bethonged cottage cheese asses are such country-ghetto hobags.

    Bimbos. Sluts. Trailer trash. Skanks. By any name they’re still human garbage and a waste of this planet’s valuable resources.

    *

  42. Rasputins Liver

    *

    The chicks who think the rest of the world wants to gaze upon their bethonged cottage cheese asses are such country-ghetto hobags.

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    *

  43. gigi

    yikes, Vinny’s chick looks like some kind of human/spider hybrid that or a kinda cute guy…. Pauly’s girl is cute– cottage cheesy but I’m sure he wants her with a little insecurity… easier to manipulate

  44. Doc Schweinstrudel

    They look so retarded, stop posting them, I’m sure nobody even watches the show!!!!

  45. Jwhoa!

    I don’t know who these people are, I just come here for the shoe and handbag commercials.

  46. Major Problems

    PLEASE somebody, anybody ride these wax heads off into the middle of the Bermuda Triangle, PLEASEEEE!!!!!!

  47. esb

    The poster children for melanoma.

  48. itsamanbaby

    That’s a man in a green bikini. The shoulders and straight hips are give away. Also his hands are as big as the other men’s hands. Pretty gross really.

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