These Take Me Back

So remember how Britney Spears was looking somewhat decent the other day? Welcome back to a land called “Reality,” my friends.

Here she is leaving Starbucks in Calabasas yesterday where she reminded all of us she’s never more than one java chip away from shitting in our faces because she custom designs her clothes for elegance not function. I wonder how many times her bodyguards have to lie and say she looks hot before pulling straws to see who gets to be the one shot in the groin with a pistol.

BODYGUARD 1: But, dude, you got to be shot last time.
BODYGUARD 2: The straws have chosen- Oh, God, she’s stripping in McDonald’s PlayLand again. Attack pattern delta!

Photos: Fame, Splash News