There’s a Jon Gosselin sex tape
Let’s not act like this wasn’t always one booty hunt through Ponderosa away from happening. Via the National Enqurier:
Jon’s bodyguard Thomas Meinelt has been subpoenaed to testify in TLC’s lawsuit against Jon, and The ENQUIRER has learned Meinelt claims he saw Jon snort cocaine many times, and that he’s watched Jon’s secret sex tape!
“Tom told me that Jon was secretly videotaped having sex with a woman in Los Angeles in October, and he’s seen the tape!” said Stephanie Santoro, Jon’s former flame and family nanny.
“Tom said people close to Jon put a camera in his hotel room, and paid a girl to flirt with Jon and have sex with him.
“He also told me that he saw Jon snort cocaine on more than one occasion, and that the more Jon got into partying, the more cocaine he used!”
Well, this explains all the spiritual awakening and self-parodying that’s been going on lately. Although I was kind of hoping it’d be for something a little more original than a sex tape. Like Jon Gosselin secretly trained his kids to be an elite squad of dead hooker disposers. Or he gave his social security number to Michael Lohan for a shoebox of Lindsay’s old bras which, in hindsight, I probably shouldn’t rule out. Keep that one open.