The Superficial Ketchup

August 9th, 2006 // 37 Comments

  1. cookiemonster


  2. griffmills

    I love the picture of the yawning lady beside Robin, she must be watching RV

  3. I Fucked Your Honor Student

    First I fucked cookiemonsters honor student then I fucked his cookie.

  4. Yeah, I’m with you. It’s been an awfully slow newsday.

  5. herbiefrog

    Robin Williams has entered rehab to treat alcoholism, after being sober for 20 years and finding himself drinking again.,26334,1224730,00.html

    …its just fuel man
    …you are sposed
    …to be smart enuf : )
    …to figue it out

  6. thesarahficial

    this news is so exciting

  7. I really don’t believe he was sobber for 20 years, there is just no way he wasn’t on something.

  8. Maybe the whole Mel Gibson got Williams thinking again.

    Or maybe because he lost the role of Joker to Heath friggin Ledger?

  9. combustion8

    shanna moakler kicked to the curb.. too bad she used to be “amazingly” hot.. it’s a shame what drugs and shiting out 3 babies can do to a playmate.

  10. robin williams = unfunny all the time

  11. Ivana Mandalay

    I’d divorce that bitch Shanna too if she named my poor kid “Alabama”

    Total hick name, I’m surprised Britney Spears didn’t sue her for taking the white trash hick name first.

    Besides, First she was with Dennis Quaid, then Oscar De La Hoya, then Travis Barker??
    You’re supposed to UPGRADE, not fall into a downward spiral of ugly, overly tattooed, toothpick skinny, has-been rock stars. Damn girl, have a little respect for yourself.

    Well, wait…
    She IS after all a has-been Playmate who looks about 40 lbs heavier so she’s gotta take what she can get to support her bon-bons habit.


    Robin Williams – He had to blame RV on something. He only has a “problem” when he mixes his coke with alcohol (and I’m not talking Rum and Coke). I can’t recall a Tonight Show appearance in the last 20 years where he wasn’t hyperfrenetic. But I’m sure he doesn’t see nose candy as an issue as he thinks it only enhances his comedy.
    Bruce Willis – What kind of friend are we talking about, and how damaging the photos to demand that much? I mean, is there a pic of Bruce doing a Tom Cruise impersonation (toking on a cock)? Or fellating a goat smeared in the blood of an unborn child? It can’t be something so lame as a mullet shot or Bruce wearing parachute pants and moonwalking.
    The Barkers – The MTV curse is as real as King Tut’s. First Nick and Jessica, then Dave and Carmen, now Travis and Shanna. All had MTV shows and all took the short drive to splitsville. I am curious as to it being Travis filing and not Shanna. I bet he caught her smothering a poolboy with her twat.

  13. KristinMichelle

    It’s about time Travis dropped that golddigger! She already weasled over $60 million out of Oscar De La Hoya in some weird palimony suit. Her strange fascination for older or egregiously tattooed men shows that the only common denominator in the rainbow of men she has dated is that they are famous and past their prime.

  14. Me

    My god leave the poor woman alone. In one forum you are all bashing a kid for saying Nichole Richie is too thin, now you are calling an average sized ex-miss usa a bob bon eating hippo. No wonder girls have such fucked up body views. You just cant win.

  15. krisdylee

    Male “celebs” I’d like to punch in the nads:

    Robin Williams
    Jim Carey
    Nicholas Cage
    Dave Navarro
    Regis Philbin


  16. Me

    Im sorry, I ment bashing a kid, saying Nichole Richie is disgustingly thin, yet vulgerly bashing Shauna for being hugely “fat”.

  17. Robin Williams-

    Addictions are rough, I feel for him. It is not easy living in this world. People can be so terribly cruel, self esteem is so easily damaged and the fact that he is trying to overcome his addiction is admirable.

  18. RichPort

    Robin Williams was arrested for talking erratically while walking down Hollywod Blvd, angrily channeling his oft performed, annoying personalities. Police department officials report he had a BAC of an inhuman 53%, muttering endlessly “Are you from Ork? Everyone knows Orkans are responsible for all the wars in the world!”, before an ecscape attempt that ended steps later in an embarassing face plant on the hot sidewalk. When officers tried to calm him, he crazily reached for a faded wallet sized photo of Pam Dawber with the edges slightly torn and frayed, screaming “SUGAR TITS!” incessantly, holding it before him as if it were a talisman. Officials with the police department report he was only awoken from his stupor after being restrained and forced to watch his own asinine movies, prompting the actor/ comedian to admit he has a problem with alcohol, namely that he had just run out of it.

  19. YoMamma

    @#15…I’ll jump on that nad punching.

    David Hasselhoff
    Mel Gibson
    Tom Cruise
    Tommy Lee
    Emeril. I hate that guy. BAM!! FUCK OFF!

    oh yeah…Robin Williams. Twice. In his hairy stinky OLD balls.

  20. 19. Don’t mess with The Hoff!

    However, feel free to employ as ballistic pendulums the miniscule scrotums of any of the following fucktards.

    Floyd Landis
    Clay Aiken
    Jay Leno
    Rosie O’Donnell
    The Baldwins
    Tom Hanks
    Hayden Christensen
    George Bush
    Laura Bush
    Nick Lachey
    The Senate
    Gnarls Barkely
    Bill O’Reilly
    Hugo Chavez
    Sean Hannity
    Alan Colmes
    Sean Combs
    Steve Guttenberg
    Major League Baseball
    Hillary Clinton

  21. Sir Psycho Sexy

    Yes, I know that Hillary is also in the Senate, so kick her twice, …

  22. Ivana Mandalay

    Dear “Me”:

    ” now you are calling an average sized ex-miss usa a bob bon eating hippo. No wonder girls have such fucked up body views.”

    Did you ever watch “Meet the Barkers”? Shanna was ALWAYS in bed. The only time that bitch wasn’t in bed was when she was out spending Travis’ money on ridiculously expensive baby furniture or Louis Vuitton luggage. Must be nice.

  23. Ivana Mandalay

    Major League Baseball wears cups…

    Put on yer steel toed boots, baby.

  24. krisdylee

    Sylvester Stallone

  25. LL

    #18,19,20: damn, I’m still laughin…

    RE Robin Williams: good actor (no, really) but his “comedy” must be like stealth technology or something cause I just don’t see it. His nonstop babbling and sound effects and funny voices make him seem like Rainman. And not in a charming way, but in a shut-the-fuck-up-already way.

    RE Travis Barker and his wife: I have no idea who either of these people are. They actually have a TV show? Jebus, they really will put anyone on TV. Why the hell don’t I have a TV show? I can lay in bed all day and babble incoherently. I can trade legal tender for goods and services. She gets to be on TV cause she has huge boobs and no dignity whatsoever? Life is so unfair.

    RE Bruce: Bruce, whatever happens, just start screamin about Jews, and all will be forgiven.

  26. Binky

    There’s a thin line between alcholism and ‘coping’
    But, hey, you’ve got to admit – ‘Mindy’ carried this guy for years in the TV days.
    The guy’s lucky to have a career. Comedy only goes so far now-a-daze.

  27. Cleosneedle

    Re: Barkers

    All I ever saw her do on that damn tv show was lay her fat ass in bed. She didn’t really work, slept all day, spent too much money on crap and had a nanny take care of her kids. It’s about time Travis got that leach of him.

  28. Me

    I am actually not a Shania fan, more of a Travis fan… but if you visit her website you can see she isn

  29. likeyoureanybetter

    Someone has to explain something to me. OKay, I don’t know who writes this bul*s*it, or why everyone seems to f*cking love it, but why is everything I’ve read, just insults to every celebrity. Seriously, the only way anyone could like any of this is if you hate every single famous person. How the hell does that work?

    There are some celebrities who I don’t like for whatever reason, but I don’t make a website about them and come up with stories about what they did and how retarded they were to do it.

    And really- about Robin Williams, I’m not a big fan, and I don’t really care what goes on in his life, but everyone’s so god da*n harsh.

    Screw all you guys, who have nothing better to do than insult famous people.

  30. Binky

    Likeyouremisusingthebutter is right.
    Screw you guys.
    Everyone’s cool. Everything is cool.
    But I’d better get back to the monastery. My bell ringing class starts in an hour and this connection blows.

  31. ch474

    I think Robin’s flug his share of poo over the years.

  32. jrzmommy

    I liked Robin Williams better when he was running around amped on coke.

    My top 5 Punch to the Nads Winners are:
    John Travolta
    Graydon Carter
    Al Gore
    Michael Douglas
    Lorenzo Lamas

    Hall of Fame Status, which means it goes without saying:
    Tom Cruise
    Tommy Hilfiger
    Osama bin Laden bin bang bang
    Prince Charles
    Kim Jong Il
    Hugo Chavez
    Fidel Castro

    20–ha ha, Rosie O’Donnell.

  33. jrzmommy

    29 reminds me of Cartman on South Park, “Screw you guys; I’m going home.”

  34. knowhere

    alcohol isn’t a problem. it’s the solution!

  35. YoMamma

    We ARE better. Deal with it.

  36. happy_bunny

    Any one of these stories here in Ketchup is way more interesting than Nicole Richie and her creepy mystery man.

  37. ImSuicidal

    biatcho – Hopeless_ ask me to invite you to a party over at: . He’s got a new name “cock”- something or other
    He’ll want you to bring a gift!

    PS He’s in the witness protection program so keep it hush, hush.

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